Page 57 of Fate

He did not grasp her shoulders. Did not pull her up to meet him, to shake her as his expression suggested was to be his aim.

Instead, he knelt. Pushing his way between her legs and she forgot to tell him to be careful of her skirts and the fabric. Could not think of anything at all but the look in his eyes, the way he cupped her face between his palms, ensuring she see nothing but him.

“Do you dislike me as well?” he asked, his voice tight. She could feel his battle for control through the bond, felt the tension and the wrestling just as she experienced it for herself.

She did not know how to answer him. A fervent no rested on her lips, but there was more. All that she did not know. All that she was afraid to know. And yes, she would dislike him as much as the others—perhaps even more so. Her disappointment in him would be so acute if he sided with them. If any part of him could embrace that sort of...

Evil.

That’s what it was.

There were laws about this. Everyone said so. Even if... even if she could recite none of them.

Was that on purpose?

“I want you to be mine,” Firen answered instead. “I want you to want to be. I want you to be as disgusted by your father’ssolutionas I am.” Her own anger flared, and she had to pause before she lost control of it. “I want it to be so unthinkable that you would...” She stopped herself. She could not command his actions. Just because her temper insisted that she leave when situations grew too heated for anything useful to come of them, that did not mean that she must insist that Lucian do the same.

But she could hope. Could conjure all sorts of fantasies. Of Lucian denouncing the entire lot of them. Of claiming his mateand taking her into his arms and flying her back home where they could be safe and happy.

Those pictures came easily.

What to do with this man—the whole of him. Real and damaged, even if neither of them knew precisely how badly.

That was not so easy.

“I am not safe here,” Firen said instead. Lucian rolled his eyes and his hands fell away from her, but he did not move from his position crouched before her. “I... I admit I thought you dramatic. Before. But I think you were perhaps a little too careful with how much I’d be despised.” She could say it so calmly, even though her heart raced, and she saw him flinch. And she hadn’t meant to cause that.

It made it easier to reach for him. To touch his cheek and offer a moment’s comfort for them both. “I’ll not stay here,” she finished. “I know you won’t follow. And that hurts more than I care to admit. But Lucian...”

She did not want to say it. They were family. He loved his mother. But Firen could see little better in her side of it than her mate’s.

“I don’t belong here. They will not let me. So I will go home. Where I am safe. With parents that would do anything within their power to help our bond. Helpus.And maybe...” her throat burned. Her heart raced within her chest, and the bond heaved and tugged because... because she was leaving. And it knew.

Knew more that he would let her.

That he would not choose her.

“Maybe someday you’ll come to appreciate just how good we could have it.” She leaned forward and placed a kiss upon his cheek, and she couldn’t breathe, but that was all right. She’d be flying soon. With all the freedom she missed. And all the pain that seemed to be her new companion.

“You know where to find me,” Firen murmured, and she stood. An awkward thing to attempt when he was crouched so close, but she managed it.

She’d fetch her trunk. It was not so large or so heavy she could not take it home with her again.

She couldn’t look at him. Not when it would only lead to weeping—on her part alone, she was certain. But if he would not care for her, would not protect her, she would go to those who would.

“You know where to find me,” she choked out, turning and preparing herself to fly upward. To his room. Where she would not linger. Would not spare the time to imagine the night they’d shared there. How... perfect it had been. For a little while. “When you’re ready.”

When the bond made him find her. When pain and urgency overtook everything else.

Unless he allowed his family to do that procedure on him.

To be rid of her.

The thought left her cold. Left her shaking. Made her leap upward a stunted effort that would set any fledgling to shame.

But it did not matter, anyway.

Not when he was plucking her from what little air she’d found.

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