Page 11 of Protecting Bianca

He wasn’t mine.

That last one I’d been struggling with for a while. But it was true. He was here, and he didn’t try to explain what had happened all those years ago. He was here, but he wasn’t with me.

Being present with him, I realized that he had moved on and made something of himself. Our lives were so very different. Seeing him here, his hand over mine, and he said nothing, finally made me see that it was over. It was truly done. And now, I could finally move on, too.

4

Jager

Despite the darkness, I maneuvered around my apartment as though it was the middle of the day. I was used to it. I walked around every night, sometimes for most of the night. I never slept. I couldn’t. My dreams were too awful. Too many bodies. Too many innocent lives.

I knew the military would be tough, but I’d thought worrying about my own life would be the worst of it. It wasn’t. By the end, I ran into buildings without even thinking if I would make it out alive. I just knew that I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t try to get one of my brothers out, or God forbid, a civilian.

I was sure I hadn’t even seen the worst of what humanity had to offer. I’d just seen enough to lose sleep over it.

I’d finished importing everyone’s thumbprints into the scanner hours ago, and now checked on the cameras I installed at the entrance. Before Mr. Towers finished for the day, I’d held a meeting with his driver, instructing him to pick up Mr. Towers from the building’s underground garage and take him straight to his home where another security guard that I hired would meet and stay with him overnight. I preferred staying at my place after work since all my equipment was set up and I could monitor the cameras in the home and office from here.

I walked over to the bar and poured myself a drink. Just one finger, though.

There was a time when I wouldn’t stop pouring until the amber liquid hit the rim. It was the only way I would sleep, passing out drunk.

But my brothers quickly disabused me of that method. Cold showers, bodily threats, and genuine love made me realize that I needed to feel rather than be numb. So, I took my ass to therapy two years ago and have kept it to one drink a week.

This week, however, I had two. But it was an exceptional week.

I sawheragain.

I knew seeing her would be difficult. I knew I would feel some sort of way about it. I hadn’t expected to feel so much. I buried it in the pit of my stomach. I had no right to touch her, but I couldn’t stop myself. She was even more beautiful than I remember. Her hair was longer, the waves looser. Her rounded cheeks were sculpted above the most sensuous mouth I’d ever seen.

That body. She wasn’t a cute girl anymore. She was a damn fine woman.

I fucked up.

I was too late.

I had to move on. She had. She was a brilliant publicist for one of the most successful companies in New York City, maybe even in the world. She didn’t need me.

That wasn’t true.

She needed my protection. If someone decided to deliver a more explosive package the next time, she could get hurt. Or they could show up at the office with a weapon instead.

No. I would do whatever it took to keep her safe.

I placed the glass in the dishwasher and grabbed a mug. I didn’t need the coffee to stay up, but I liked how it tasted.

I placed the brew on the dining room table and picked up a pen.

Who would want to scare or hurt Towers?

There was the list of people who wrote nasty things online that Janis had emailed me, but they rarely ventured far from their keyboards.

Besides, this message seemed personal. My gut told me that Towers knew the person responsible. I brainstormed some possibilities: former employees, current employees, business partners, failed business partners, current lovers, and past lovers. The list kept growing.

It would take weeks, if not months, to compile background checks on all these people and set up surveillance. The first thing I needed to do was secure the office and its employees. So, if the threat was within the company, I had to know that now.

Grabbing a red file folder, I pulled out the employee list and their employee record. This record would have their birth date and other information to do a background check. I logged into the police database. The police chief had never denied my request for background checks, so I didn’t feel guilty hacking into their system. It would take days to get all this information from their clerk. There was no time to waste.

As I searched their background files, perhaps five or six employees drew red flags. Two had been to prison for assault, one was arrested but released for stalking another employee, and the last two were misdemeanors, but I kept their files handy.

---