Page 70 of Protecting Bianca

17

Bianca

I stared at the bricked homes as the black SUV drove down my street. Jager had insisted on calling a cab for me since I wanted to speak to River alone. I was glad to have this time to collect my thoughts.

At first, I was livid. I couldn’t believe my brother would have the audacity to take away my choices. Then, after Jager explained that he understood why River had done it, I wavered a bit. But not for long. He wasn’t my father, although he had taken on that role when my father walked out years ago. It didn’t give him the right to make those decisions for me.

Now, sitting in the back of this tan leather upholstered car, I rubbed my sweaty palms over my black pants and tried to decipher what I felt and what I would say.

I imagined storming through the front doors and slamming the door behind me, demanding an explanation. I also imagined packing my bags and leaving without as much as a ‘see you later’. None of those felt right.

The car pulled into my driveway, and I had run out of time.

“Thank you,” I said and climbed out of the backseat.

My heels clicked on the concrete pavement leading to our front door. The door was locked, as usual, and I dug out my keys from inside my purse.

When I walked in, the TV was on and the hockey game was playing, but River wasn’t in the living room. A waft of fresh tomato sauce lured me toward the kitchen.

River’s back was turned as he stirred the steaming pot on the stove. The image should have been soothing, but it reminded me so much of my mother that my arms went numb for a minute. I knew River wasn’t her, but I couldn’t help but remember all the times she threw her acts of service at us. She would remind me of all the things she had done and how little I appreciated them. Even though I could easily list the ways I contributed to the family, she never saw them. Or at least chose not to. So, River cooking dinner on the night I planned to confront him, actually bothered me more than it should have.

When he turned and saw me standing there, he didn’t smile or ask how my day was. “About time you came back home.”

“Excuse me?”

“Since when do you stay overnight two nights in a row and I don’t get a text from you? I know you’re grown now, but I’m still your brother.”

Oh, this man had no idea what he just started.

“Right. You’re my brother. You’re supposed to support me. So, why are you acting like such a dick?”

He crossed his arms and squinted his eyes. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Bianca?”

I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes. “We need to talk.”

“Yeah, I agree. Two days with Jager and you’re calling me names.”

“I shouldn’t have said that, but I’m mad, River. Livid, actually.”

“What are you mad about? I haven’t even spoken to you in two days. What could I have done to upset you?”

I crossed my arms and mirrored his angry stance. Then I held his eyes and with a controlled voice, I told him.

“You never gave me his note.”

He stared at me for a minute, then shook his head and laughed without humor. “He just couldn’t wait to blame this on me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Did he tell you that he dropped you like a bad habit when I made him choose?”

“Yes.”

He pursed his lips and blinked, surprised that I knew. “He also regretted that decision and wrote me a letter the next day.”

“Did he regret it right away or did he regret it after he was arrested and thought he would never be free again and wanted you there to visit him in prison?”

“How can you say that? He was your friend!”

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