Page 66 of The Cowboy's Unlikely Love

“Sure.”

“I might be wrong, and I know it all happened so fast, but I thought you saw me as more than just some guy you met in a bar.”

“Oh, Tanner! You were so much more than that.”

“Iwas?”

“Yes. We connected, there was something special there.”

“I thought so, too. But what I meant was … Is it a case of Iwasmore than that, or can I still be more than that?”

“I … What do you mean?”

“I think you know what I mean, Ev. I don’t want this to be over.”

She had to swallow around the lump in her throat.

“I understand if I blew it. You can tell me. But…”

“You didn’t blow it, Tanner. If anyone did that, it was me.”

“No. I guess when it comes down to it, it was just circumstances. If we’d had a little bit more time, you would have told me when you were ready. I would’ve been surprised, but I need you to know that it wouldn’t have put me off.”

“No?”

“No. I know it’s easy to say now that I already know, but…”

“But you were honest when my dad asked you… You said that you’re not ready to be a father. And dammit, I hate how that sounds. I’m not asking you to be – I wouldn’t ask you to be. We still barely know each other. But if this… whatever this is between us… There’s no point in even thinking about any of it if… Ashton’s my whole world, Tanner. Even if you’ve discovered that you’re at the point in life where you want to have a family, you can go out and meet a girl and start a family of your own. Ashton and I are already our own little family unit. We’re a package deal.”

“I get that. I’d like to meet him. I don’t want to go out and meet a girl. I already met you. And you and Ashton being a package deal isn’t a problem for me.”

“But Tanner, only yesterday, you said that you’re not ready to be a father.” She was reminding herself of that fact as much as she was reminding him. She’d love to believe him, love to think that maybe he’d turn out to be the kind of father figure she wanted for her son. But that was crazy thinking, and she needed to remember that.

“I’m not denying it. It was true, when your dad laid it on me like that, I didn’t think I was ready. Because I’d never considered needing to be ready yet. Not until now. Until you. I didn’t think I was ready for a real relationship – but I figured that out in a hurry. And since you left, I haven’t thought about much of anything else. Obviously, I can’t promise you I’ll be great at it. I’ll have to learn, but the thing is… I want to learn, if you’ll let me.”

She covered her eyes with her hand. “It’s not that I don’t want to, Tanner. You’re an amazing guy. But I have to think about Ashton. About what’s best for him. And apart from anything else, you seem to be forgetting that we live a thousand miles apart.”

“I know. It’s crazy. But that’s not going to stop me. The only thing that’ll stop me is if you tell me that you don’t want me. If you say that you don’t want me in your life, or in Ashton’s life, I’ll leave you alone.”

She stared at the phone. “I don’t know, Tanner.”

“That’s a start.”

“It is?”

He let out a short laugh. “It is. I was dreading an outrightno. Since you don’t know, can we at least keep talking while you decide?”

She smiled as she felt the tension leave her body. “Yeah. I’d like that. I really don’t know if this can go anywhere, but I’m not ready to say goodbye to you.”

“Then don’t. We can keep talking on the phone like this whenever you have the time. We can text. If you like, I’ll come down there and see you – meet Ashton…”

“Slow down. I need to take this one step at a time.”

“Right. I just need you to know that meeting him and coming to visit you are steps that I’m willing to take – that Iwantto take.”

“Okay.”

He sighed. “Am I going too fast? Coming on too strong?”

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