Page 31 of Eagle

“Well, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I just didn’t think you needed to know because it was so long ago and we were never a thing.”

Blowing a breath through puffed cheeks, I said, “My guess is he’s been around quite a bit. It’s kind of nice that none of you wanted to rub it in my face. I don’t even know why I asked him. Maybe deep down I knew and just wanted a reason to be mad.” Looking over at her I chuckled. “I was about to cave right before I blurted that out.”

“If it’s any consolation, I’ve hung around a few years and I’ve never seen him like that. Ever,” she said as she swiped a hand through the air.

Looking back at the TV, I clenched my jaw. “I don’t know if that makes it better or worse.”

“Lacy, you’re welcome here as long as you like, and I knowyou had your reasons, but maybe hear him out.”

My head whipped in her direction and I winced again as my head felt like it was splitting. I put my hand to my temple and squeezed my eyes shut until it passed. “Eh tu, Bruté?”

“I’m just saying. He was shaken up. These guys don’t get shaken up. And I’ve never seen Eagle so unhinged.”

“I don’t know if I should be excited about him being unhinged.” Although it did make me feel some kind of way I couldn’t describe. Where was that when I was around, though?

“Do you think he’d ever really hurt you?”

“Not that way. But sometimes the cuts you can’t see are the ones that sting the worst.”

“You been abused before?”

Thinking back to all the losers I’d been with over the last few years, I had been through it all. Some started fairly soon, those were the ones it was easy to get away from. It was the ones who charmed you at first then gradually got physical over time that were tricky. They’d get into your head. And it was small and slow. Before you knew it, you’re crumpled in a ball, covering your face. But then came the love bombs. It was a toxic cycle. You don’t realize how hard it is to walk away until you’re in that position. And I didn’t even have kids. I couldn’t imagine the torment a mother in that position must feel. You know it’s not safe, but something just won’t let you go. Plus, the fear that if you left and they found you you’d be as good as dead. The stats don’t lie. Women who leave either end up dead or struggle for years. The resources are limited and cops can’t or won’t act until it’s too late. But my statement was true. Bruises healed, but the anxiety, fear, and depression that followed was what really messed you up.

“Yes. I have been. And I think that’s why I tried to stick it outwith Eagle. He never gaslit me, no head games, and never laid a hand on me. But he also didn’t realize I existed until he was ready for bed. One thing I’ve tried to learn through each failed relationship is when it’s time to go.”

“Well, you gotta do what’s best for you, girl. Like I said, you’re welcome here as long as you want.”

I smiled over at her. “I appreciate it, Jeannie. And seriously, we’re good. I’m sorry I threw that out there. I didn’t even really want to know. It just came out.”

“Well, we were pretty hammered. But hell, we were here and had nowhere to go. No men lurking around. I figured it was safe to throw ‘em back,” she said as she sipped her coffee.

“Well, I don’t need to drink anything for five years.”

After we both had a laugh, knowing we’d both probably drink again at least within the month, we sat in silence watching TV for a few minutes when there was a knock at the door. We both looked at each other and Jeannie stood up. “Fucking salesmen. When you’re home during the day midweek you get them a lot. At least out here.”

Being secluded at the clubhouse meant never getting any random knocks at the door. Jeannie was in her pajamas with her hair piled on her head. She put her mug on the side table and shuffled to the door.

It was a little muffled, but I heard her say, “Oh shit. What are you doing here?”

I turned, trying to look but the short hall leading to the front door was blocking my view. But my stomach dropped when I heard the response. “I’m not here to start trouble. I just need to see her for a minute.”

Why was he back here? Looking down, I cursed myself for throwing his shirt on. Then my hands went to my face when Iremembered I hadn’t even swiped mascara on. I was naturally blonde so my lashes were light and thin. Add light blue eyes and I looked like a ghost without a little color on my face.

Wait…why did I care? I’d figure that out later. I got up and headed to the door. Jeannie shouldn’t be responsible for running interference. I cleared my throat as I walked behind her. Jeannie turned back and she scrunched her face.

“It’s okay, Jeannie. I got it.”

Jeannie stepped out of the way and squeezed my hand before she went back to the living room. My eyes squinted. I couldn’t look up. The sun was bright. That was my story and I was sticking to it. But even without looking at his face, I couldn’t help the flutters at seeing him. Something about him with his worn jeans, black boots, and his leather cut was just sexy.

“Hey. How you feeling?” Even his voice was sexy.

“Like hot garbage. What do you want, Eagle?”

“So many things. But for now, I just wanted to give you this.” He held a bag out. When I went to grab it, his other hand grabbed mine and the jolt that went to my chest nearly made my knees buckle. He lifted my hand and leaned down to kiss my knuckles.

“Eagle–”

“I’m sorry. I just needed to feel your skin.” He let me go and pushed the bag toward me. “Please take this.”