Page 34 of Releasing Darkness

“His name is Max.” I pulled the shirt from my body, noticing how my flesh was stained red. “He belongs to my mate.” I looked up and stared him in the eye. Varek smiled, then backed up, closing the door as he went. Before the door clicked shut, I heard a muttered “understood”. Somehow, knowing that my mate was well protected, I was able to breathe a little easier than I would have thought possible while not being able to have my eyes on her.

I stripped off the trousers and then reached my hand inside the glass cubicle, checking the stream of water. I wouldn’t have cared if it were ice cold as long as I could get cleaned up and return to my mate’s side as quickly as possible. I just wanted to know what I was stepping into. I had been told that these ‘showers’ were hot, but I hadn’t quite understood that they truly were.

I walked inside, ducking my head under the spray, allowing it to soak my hair thoroughly. The heat seeped into my muscles,and I closed my eyes. I rested my forearms against the glass wall as I breathed deeply. It had been over three thousand years since I had experienced a warm bath, and never one that got as truly hot as the water that was spraying down on me. Something broke inside me as the thought flitted through my mind, and for the second time, my knees failed to hold my weight. I collapsed to the shower floor and let the water wash away the proof of my pain.

I hadn’t cried since I was a young boy, always too proud to allow others to see me as weak. As I was kept in chains, as I suffered through tortures that lasted for days, even as I starved, I never shed a tear. The emotional pain I felt at the fear of never seeing my brothers or mother again, though debilitating, wasn’t enough to break me. I wasn’t sure what was causing me to fall apart now. Maybe it was fear for my mate. Maybe it was finally sinking in that I was free. It was probably everything hitting me at once. I wasfree. I had a mate. My mate wasdying.

I wanted to curse at the gods for giving me my life back, for giving me everything I could have dreamed of asking for. My brothers, my mate, my freedom. Instead, my heart was crumbling in my chest. My mate had done this. She’d practically carried me out of the dungeon up multiple flights of steps, then across fields and through the forest until she found a safe place, all while I’d treated her as the enemy. She never gave up on me. Her care and nourishment brought me here.

I lifted my head back, letting the water stream into my face, pretending that the moisture there was only water. Then I let out all my rage and pain with a bellow that rattled the glass enclosure dangerously. When the last sound left my body, I stopped pretending and let the tears flow.

I was uncertain how long I knelt there, it could have been hours, but I finally had no more to give. With a hand pressed to the wall, I rose to my feet. With bleary eyes, I looked around,uncertain what to do next, when my gaze landed on a strange contraption that looked as if it were filled with three different types of liquid. I remembered what my brother said about soaps and shampoos.

Studying the labels, I chose one that I believed was the shampoo he’d instructed me to use on my hair. I took a sniff, finding it pleasant, but unable to place the scent. I brought it to my hair and began to scrub. Then I used my claws, remembering the thousands of years I’d spent with only the very occasional bucket of icy water tossed over my broken body to wash away some of the blood. I rinsed the shampoo and then immediately took another handful, filling my palm until the liquid dripped over the sides. Again, I scrubbed furiously. As soon as I was done, I ignored the conditioner and went for the other soap.

My entire body was lathered with thick suds. There wasn’t a single spot that I missed as I scraped with my claws. I watched as some spots turned bloody, but instantly healed from the scratches I’d made.

After rinsing, I hesitated and then took a small amount of the conditioner, applying it to my tangled hair. I could tell an immediate difference in the texture. I took a few more pumps until my long hair was coated before rinsing that as well.

With nothing more to do and with the water no longer as hot as it was at the start of my cleansing, I twisted the handles. A blast of icy water had me sucking in a breath. I quickly turned until the handles could no longer twist, and finally, the cold water shut off. I stood there dripping for a moment, then noticed a thick drying cloth hanging from the top of the glass door. I held it in my hands and began to pat down my body. I’d never felt such a soft drying cloth before. As a boy, our drying rags were always a touch rough, making the experience a bit… unpleasant. This realm was definitely different.

I opened the door and stepped out onto another drying cloth laid out on the floor. I stepped over to the wash basin, noticing the clothes folded in a pile that Varek had set out for me. Staring at the looking glass covered with steam, I hesitated, then swiped my hand over it until I could see my distorted reflection.

The first thing I noticed was the broken horn that I suspected would never grow back. That made me think of my mate. If I couldn’t heal from the damage that fucking metal had done, could she? As I stared, I decided I no longer wanted a reminder of my torment and allowed the glamor to take over. Demons rarely, if ever, used glamor in the Underworld, though most were taught early as yet another skill we all possessed. It took just a slight bit of concentration, and then, instead of the soulless black eyes I was used to, bright green eyes appeared.

I looked around, opening drawers, until I found a brush similar to the one Sasha had used in the cave. I ran the brush roughly through my long black hair until the snarls were all removed, and it fell over my shoulders smoothly.

I dropped the drying cloth from around my waist, where I had tucked it securely, and picked up the garment on top of the pile of clothing. It was another black shirt, nearly identical to the one my mate had given me. I pulled it on over my head and then reached for the undergarment resting on top of the trousers. It was unlike any I’d seen before, but once I had them in place, I could appreciate the design of the longer legs that came down to my upper thighs.

The trousers fit much more comfortably than the previous ones had, and I knew they must have come from one of my brother’s wardrobes. On the floor were foot coverings, but I ignored them for now. I had no intention of leaving the room until my mate woke. Until then, I would stay by her side, regardless of how long it took.

Chapter

Twenty-One

SASHA

Iwatched the thick fog swirl around as if moved by a gentle breeze. However, I couldn’t feel a breeze from the inner circle where I sat—I felt nothing at all.

Sometimes, I would stand and lean over the fountain my back was currently resting against, peering into the water, feeling as if secrets were to be found there if I only knew where or how to look. But all I ever saw was my own distorted reflection.

Often, my mind would wander as I watched the thick fog that kept me trapped by the fountain. I felt as if there was something important I had forgotten, but then my mind would drift again before I could pursue the thought further.

Time held no meaning in the strange place I found myself in. Neither did emotions. There was no worrying, no stress or fear. There also was no happiness, love, or joy. But I couldn’t bring myself to care about that.

I stood up and walked right to the edge of the swirling fog. There was no looking past it to see what, if anything, lay beyond. I reached out my hand to touch it, but while it was sothick I couldn’t see through, it also seemed insubstantial. Like shadows…

A memory tried to surface, but it was just a flicker before dissipating as if it had never been there at all. I let out a soft sigh and turned to take the few steps necessary to reach the fountain but froze as my eyes found those of another being.

I stared, only summoning up a mild curiosity as to who they were. I tilted my head as I took in the long, shimmering hair that fell clear to the floor and draped there like a puddle of golden silk. I picked up the end of my own heavy braid, taking in the dark red strands of hair woven together before letting it drop to my waist.

The female was wearing a long light blue gown that hugged her curves while billowing outward. She wore no jewelry, only a circlet with a gemstone the same brilliant blue as her eyes that rested against the pale skin of her forehead. She was a flawless beauty and someone who knew far more than anyone could ever imagine. It was there in her eyes as I took in her ethereal appearance.

“Are you God?” I asked, still taking in everything I could about this being who couldn’t be real.

Laughter so sweet and melodious rang out around me that I couldn’t help but close my eyes to properly savor the sound. “Oh, sweet Sasha, how delightful you are. There are many deities in many languages, in many lands, and in many realms. I am but one of many.”

“I sense that you are important to me somehow,” I squinted, trying to understand why I would even care. “Why is that?”

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