Page 75 of Bird on a Blade

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

EDIE

Sawyer was right about the weather turning.

I sit on the sofa in the cabin, the TV turned on low to the local station. ABlood Raisersmarathon, since it’s Halloween, all eight of those stupid horror movies. I’ve had it on all day, ever since Sawyer gave me a long, lingering kiss on the front porch, cold winds sweeping across us. Then he was gone. He has to set everything up for tonight, and I have to be the bait that draws Scott into Sawyer’s trap.

I’m not watching TV, though. I’m staring out the window at the fuzzy grey sky. It’s been years since I’ve watched clouds fill with snow. Years since I’ve seen a real snowfall. Scott prefers warmer weather.

It’s getting darker, too, the sun dropping behind those storm clouds. Scott should have landed in Roanoke already. He should be driving along those windy mountain roads, underneath the heavy snow clouds.

I stand up, jittery with anticipation. I want so badly to call Charlotte and tell her what I’m doing. I know when she hears I’ve disappeared she’ll be devastated. But I can’t. I trust her to keep the secret, but I don’t want to put that burden on her.

She’s not like me, willing to fall into the darkness.

I look out the window, chewing on a hangnail. The driveway in front of the camp is still empty. Part of me hates the idea of Scott coming to this place, the ammunition it would give him to see the fat camp where I failed over and over to lose weight. He’ll probably make some joke about it when he gets here. Look me up and down, his lip curled in disgust. Assuming he doesn’t try to kill me right away.

No. I can’t worry about that. Sawyer is out there in the cold.ThatI’m sure of. Especially after last night, the way his eyes burned black as he told me he loved me. It almost felt like a threat, the way he said it. But everything he says, everything he does, is edged in violence?—

And I love it. Iburnfor it. And maybe that’s the real reason why I can’t call Charlotte. I don’t want her to know what I truly am. I’m not like Sawyer, but I can accept him. I can stand here in this cabin, a lure for his next victim, and know that the next time he fucks me, I’ll come at least in part because of what I’m doing right now. Because of what he’s about to do.

Tires crunch outside. My whole body goes cold, and I take a long, deep breath.

This is it.

Time to burn my life down so I can start it anew.

I sidle up to the window and peer out through the sheer curtain. Headlights sweep across the driveway and then come to a stop, flooding the little patch of dead grass in front of the cabin with yellow light. I drop the curtain, knowing Scott can see me.

Maybe it’s from being with Sawyer, but I sweep my eyes around the room and settle my gaze on the rack of knives beside the refrigerator. One’s still missing, of course.

Footsteps outside. A thump on the porch. Three heavy knocks.

I take a deep breath, and then I go to answer it.

Seeing Scott is startling. I thought I’d memorized his face, butit’s astonishing how much his features have faded from my mind after only a month. Funny how long Sawyer’s eyes lingered even after fifteen years.

“Edie.” Scott pushes inside, his gaze sweeping cautiously around the room. He’s on guard, I realize, a thought that makes my shoulders knot up with anxiety.

He knows.

Scott turns around slowly, eyes still flitting around like he’s waiting to be attacked. I dig my nails into my palm, trying to steady myself.

“What’s wrong?” I hope my voice sounds light.

Scott settles his gaze on me. His eyes are blue and very pale. When I first met him, I found them striking, but now they seem flat and dead.

Just the way they did the night he nearly killed me.

“You tell me.” He looks me over, up and down, the judgment clear on his face. “You wanted to come out here. Totalk.”

His voice drips with condescension. I wish Sawyer had stayed here with me, wish he was hiding in the closet like the villain in one of theBlood Raisersmoviesstill playing softly in the background. But he insisted on leaving. Said he needed to do some final prep before Scott arrived.

I can sense everything that’s happening here,he told me, his arms around wrapped around me on the porch.You won’t see me, but I’m here. You’re safe.

I’m still not sure about that.

Scott stares at me, waiting for a response. I choke one out.

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