Page 45 of When I'm Gone

Easton leans into my palm, seeking contact. He can never get enough and neither can I. “It was so gradual, I wasn’t even surprised the first time it happened. And he always made it seem so normal, something every couple goes through.”

I should have stayed in Florida until we found him. I knew when we left that something awful was going to happen to him, and it would be all our fault for not searching every square inch of that damn state. “You’re safe now, sweetheart. You don’t ever have to go through that again.”

“I’m such an idiot,” he admits.

“This is not on you, Easton. You were a child who didn’t grow up seeing a great example of a healthy relationship to begin with. He took advantage of your age and naivety because he wanted someone he could manipulate. He is the monster; you didn’t do anything wrong.”

He huffs sadly. “Easy for you to say, harder for me to believe.”

“That’s fair, but with time, you’ll get there.”

He murmurs into my heated skin, “I hope so.” I can hold him like this for a lifetime, curled into each other’s space with an open channel of trust flowing steadily between us.It’s a heady thing, how he’s opening up to me. My protective instincts flare wildly. It’s going to be hard to go home and face Brady when I want to lash out at anyone who looks at Easton sideways. It was a lot more manageable to not pick sides when I thought it was just damaged feelings he was dealing with, but now knowing what he went through, I want to be someone he can rely on while he’s trying to heal.

Easton’s eyelids start to fight to stay open, making my decision to call it a day an easy one. “Let’s get some sleep, yeah?”

He bobs his head and tucks himself back to my chest, sending a wave of warm and fuzzy feelings all the way down to my toes.

“Hey, Chase?” he whispers after I turn off the lamp, plunging us into darkness.

“Yeah?”

He hesitates a moment before speaking. “I really like kissing you.”

Truly, I never know what he’ll say next, but I can’t help but be glad about this. “Me too, Easton. Me too.”

CHAPTER 14

EASTON

Sleeping with Chase is nothing like sleeping with Aaron. Chase makes me feel safe and secure, almost cherished. I drift off easily into a dreamless sleep. At least I have the two nights I’ve spent with him. Without him, I can’t get out of my head. It’s torture, but at least I’m alone for it. It has nothing on how it felt to fall asleep next to him for years. The constant mid-level panic that my body had just got accustomed to functioning with, even if I knew I had done nothing wrong that would incur his wrath.

I can’t help but try to make sense of it sitting in Chase’s car on our way back to his house from the airport. How one person I knew for years made me feel sick and scared so often that I learned how to get used to it, but the person I’ve spent less than a week with makes me feel comfortable enough that I use him as a sounding board for my dumbest and most convoluted thoughts. And he’s disgustingly supportive, like, all the time. No matter what falls out of my mouth, he’s just there for me.

How weird.

What’s even more weird is that I really liked going toChicago with him. His family was not what I expected at all. They’re all so fucking open. Even when I went off the rails with his parents, it’s like they didn’t hold it over me at all. This is not what I’m used to, but I kind of like it. His mom literally got teary-eyed when she hugged me goodbye in front of the security line in the airport—she insisted on walking with us as far as she possibly could. Even told me to call her, her exact words were, “There is no such thing as hearing from you too much.”

Back when my mom acknowledged I was alive, she would get annoyed if I texted her too frequently. Anymore than three messages from me and I was going to fucking hear about it.

Chase’s phone goes off with a text message and he spares a glance at it in the cupholder. “Can you see who that is?”

I’ve fallen into this trap before, so I’m skeptical, even with how nice he’s been up until now. “You want me to look at your phone?”

“If you don’t mind,” he says.

What the hell, I guess. He gives me the passcode to unlock it and when I see the message from his sister, my heart constricts painfully. “It’s for me,” I murmur.

He prompts me to keep going, “Yeah? Who from?”

“Sage.”

Chase hums softly.

Logan: Easton, someone is missing you big time already!!

She attached a video taken from the dashboard of her car. Sage is in the back with fat tears running down her face. When Logan asks her why she’s sad, she says Eassin had to go away. You can see she cries in earnest just before it’s shut off.

When I look up, Chase has a soft look of sympatheticunderstanding overtaking his gorgeous features. “She has that effect.”

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