Page 15 of Ghost Of You

Bright lights cut through the chaos, their beams slicing through the confusion and coming into direct contact with me, blinding and disorienting. The sensation is jarring, like a harsh wake-up call that only adds to my mounting sense of bewilderment. It feels as if I’m floating in a disorienting dream, the edges of reality blurring as if I’ve been sedated or drugged.

The cacophony around me is a symphony of chaos: the blaring, unrelenting sound of a horn, the shrill, piercing screech of tires on asphalt—each noise punctuates the disarray. It’s a relentless assault on my senses, and I’m unable to make sense of it all. Then, as if the world itself is collapsing in on me,everything suddenly fades to black. The tumultuous noise, the blinding lights, the vivid images—all dissolve into an engulfing void. Silence and darkness envelop me, swallowing the chaos whole, leaving nothing but an all-consuming, impenetrable blackness.

Shooting up in bed, my chest heaving and heart pounding like a jackhammer, I wake in a fog of disorientation, struggling to piece together where I am. The room, bathed in soft morning light, slowly comes into focus, revealing that I’m alone. Laelia isn’t beside me. She must be down in her office, hard at work, or perhaps she’s already left for the day. Her absence is evident, an emptiness that lingers in the stillness of the room.

Usually, Laelia’s morning routine involves gently waking me with a kiss before heading off to her demanding job. But since the accident, her routine has shifted. The weight of her responsibilities seems to have taken over, and with her return to work, it’s clear that the workload has become overwhelming. I understand why she might not have the time or energy for those small but cherished rituals we once shared.

With a heavy sigh, I run my fingers through my dishevelled hair and flop back onto the bed, letting out another frustrated groan. What the hell was that dream about? Fragments of it flicker at the edge of my memory, elusive and haunting. It felt so real, unlike any nightmare I’ve experienced in years. I’ve grown accustomed to dreams filled with playful fantasies about celebrities or hopeful glimpses into my future with Laelia. But this—whatever it was—felt disturbingly different.

I flip over, burying my face into the pillow and letting out a muffled moan of discomfort. My body aches, a reminder of myrecent injury. I must have slept in an awkward position, and it’s certainly not helping my already sore ribs. I need to be cautious about my recovery, but going back to work so soon has already set me back. The longing for my motorbike, which has been absent from my life for just a month, only adds to my frustration. I miss the freedom it offered, the thrill of the open road that now feels like a distant memory.

Raising myself up, I take in the room’s details. My gaze falls on the bedside table, where the blue roses I placed there last night are now wilting slightly. Next to them is an empty coffee mug. Laelia’s choice of decaf, though she’s always yearning for the real thing. Her love for coffee has remained consistent over the years, always with the same order from Costa or Starbucks, accompanied by her signature cherry red lipstick, leaving its mark on every cup she uses. The sight of the lipstick stain on the mug is a small but poignant reminder of her presence.

As I move the cup to examine it more closely, something catches my eye—a glint of light reflecting off something hidden behind the mug. Reaching forward, I discover her engagement ring nestled in the small space. She must have removed it before her shower last night and forgot to put it back on. It’s a common occurrence, and though she often panics when she realises, I always reassure her that it’s not a big deal. Gently, I slide the ring back onto her finger whenever she’s around.

Holding the ring in my hand, I admire the diamond’s brilliance and the engraved words ‘Always and Forever’ on the inner band. The memory of presenting this ring to her just over three months ago rushes back, filling me with warmth and nostalgia. It was a moment of profound significance, a symbol of our enduring commitment and love.

4th March 2023

As much as I might not look it, sitting here next to her on this long plane journey, enduring the tedium of two layovers before we finally reach Tromsø, Norway, my heart is racing with a mix of excitement and sheer terror. We've been travelling for seven hours now, and as the anticipation builds, I find myself nervously counting down the minutes.

We've come all this way to witness one of nature’s most breathtaking wonders—the Northern Lights—and to fulfil a dream of hers. But more than that, I have an even greater plan in mind: to ask her to marry me beneath the shimmering aurora.

What could be more magical than a proposal set against the backdrop of the Northern Lights, dancing in the Arctic sky? I can hardly imagine a more perfect setting to take this monumental step, and I desperately hope that everything goes according to plan. The pressure is on; I’ve faced my share of mishaps in my quest to propose.

There was the time we went to that restaurant, and in a bizarre twist of fate, our table caught fire. Then there was the day at the fun fair when a child’s unfortunate accident left me covered in vomit. And let’s not forget the romantic picnic we had planned, which seemed perfect until a torrential downpour turned it into a soggy mess. Each time, my hopes seemed to slip away like sand through my fingers.

This time, though, it’s different. This time, I’ve chosen the Northern Lights because they’ve been a dream of hers for as longas I’ve known her. I want to make that dream come true, and I want it to be entwined with a moment she will cherish forever. I hope, with all my heart, that when I ask her to be my wife, she’ll say yes.

Hiding the ring has been its own adventure—one that has tested my patience and creativity. I’ve lost count of the times I’ve had to move it to a new hiding spot, desperately hoping she wouldn’t stumble upon it. Each time she’s come close to discovering it, my heart has nearly stopped.

From the moment we rekindled our love, I’ve known that I wanted a future with her. I’ve known that one day, I would ask her to be mine forever. As I sit here, waiting for our plane to land, my mind is filled with dreams of that perfect proposal and the hope that it will be everything we both have ever wished for.

As the plane begins its descent and the seat-belt signs flicker off, a wave of anticipation washes over the cabin. The usual rush to stand up and retrieve carry-ons ensues, but Laelia remains seated, her eyes barely open. She mumbles sleepily about her desire to sleep longer, and I can’t help but chuckle at her adorable grumbling. Her eyes, half-closed and heavy, shoot me a mockingly stern look, though it's clear she’s more amused than annoyed.

Laelia’s struggle with sleep is something I’ve come to recognise over the past month. She’s been perpetually tired, and it’s no wonder. Her workload has nearly doubled, pushing her to the edge. Her job, which involves working for a learning disability service, is both demanding and emotionally draining. Her role encompasses providing care, support, and assistance with schooling, work, and finances for those in need. Recently, she’s been assigned a particularly challenging case—a child who’s been shuffled through various systems and is now at their last stop, with Laelia’s team being their final hope. The case file she’s inherited is so voluminous that she’s spent an entiremonth painstakingly working through only half of it, ensuring that every detail is scrutinised to prevent any further mishaps.

What I admire most about Laelia is her unwavering dedication and boundless compassion. Despite the immense pressure, she dives deep into each case with a level of empathy that is truly inspiring. Her commitment to making a positive difference in the lives of her clients—be that children, teenagers, adults, or their families—is nothing short of remarkable. She goes above and beyond, driven by a genuine desire to help and make things right.

As we disembark the plane, Laelia reaches for my arm, seeking a steadying presence as we navigate the busy airport. We make our way to the luggage carousel, where we find ourselves waiting for what seems like an eternity as the bags slowly begin to appear. After collecting our belongings, we head towards the coach that will take us to our hotel—a much-needed respite from the relentless pace of life.

During the forty-minute drive, Laelia succumbs to exhaustion once more, her head gently resting on my arm. Her contented sigh and the occasional drool that escapes her lips cause me to smile. In those moments, I’m reminded of her vulnerability and the fact that beneath her undeniable beauty and grace, she’s as human as anyone else, complete with endearing imperfections.

As the coach rolls on towards our destination, I’m filled with a sense of warmth and gratitude. Despite the challenges she faces, Laelia remains a source of light and inspiration. Our upcoming holiday will offer her a much-deserved break and a chance to recharge, and I’m eager to share this time with her, to unwind and revel in the joy of simply being together.

As we arrive at the hotel, I gently raise my hand and tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear. Her eyes flutter open, and she quickly looks around, a bit disoriented. She hastily wipes hermouth and glances down at my sleeve, noticing the drool from her unintended nap.

“I’m so sorry,” she murmurs, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment as she bites her lip.

I can’t help but chuckle softly. “You’re lucky you’re so beautiful,” I tease, trying to lighten the mood.

Once we step off the coach, we linger beside it, eagerly waiting for our bags to be unloaded. I’m bubbling with excitement, especially since I’ve upgraded every aspect of our trip as a surprise for her. I can hardly wait to see the astonished look on her face when she realises just how luxurious our stay will be.

As we approach the hotel, the grandeur of the lobby begins to unfold before us. The space is bathed in soft light, highlighting the ivory satin-painted walls that complement the rich oak beams crisscrossing the ceiling. The reception counter, crafted from polished oak, stands at the heart of this elegant setting. In the centre of the lobby, an impressive oak table is surrounded by satin-upholstered chairs, their colour perfectly harmonising with the walls. The entire atmosphere exudes warmth and sophistication.

Overhead, a magnificent chandelier dangles gracefully, its crystals casting a mesmerising dance of light and creating shimmering diamond patterns across the floor. It feels as if we are strolling beneath a canopy of stars.

To our left, a cosy alcove beckons with its cream-coloured chairs and pale green couches, adorned with intricate beading that forms swirling patterns on the arms. The space is filled with guests engrossed in lively conversations, enjoying the comfortable and inviting ambience. Families, friends, and couples alike seem to be savouring the serene and homely comforts this exquisite hotel provides.

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