Page 74 of Meet Me at the Metro

My gut instincts carry my feet to the bathroom door, and I open it before I can stop myself. Steam is already billowing above the shower, filling the small space and fogging up the sink vanity’s mirror. My heart is beating nervously as I quietly step further into the bathroom. Theo’s heavy breaths are audible even over the noise of the shower stream.

“Teddy,” I whisper, not wanting to startle him.

“Nora,please.”

“Don’t push me away,” I beg.

I hear him take a deep, shaky exhale.

I have no clue what comes over me when I slowly and carefully pull the damp shower curtain back, but he doesn’t shy away as I expose his naked body. He’s too busy working on slowing his breathing, his fingers clutching the roots of his hair tightly. I try not to let the sight of him falter me.

Even broken like this, he still looks so hauntingly heavenly.

I swallow as the water rushes down the solid lines and grooves of his chest and abdomen. I’m thankful his gaze doesn’t settle on mine as it soaks up every inch of him because I need a few seconds to gather myself and steady my racing nerves.

Finally, I find it in myself to speak again. “I don’t want you to feel ashamed or embarrassed. It’s all okay.”

“It’s not okay,” he snaps. “None of this is fucking okay. Don’t you understand that?”

“No,” I shake my head fervently, “I don’t.”

“It’s not okay for me to pull you into this. I’ve got so much to sort out about myself. So much ugly, messed up shit that I’d be dragging you through, Nora. I can’t do that.”

“You aren’t dragging me through anything, Theo. I want this. I love being with you—being us.”

“You love being with me?” he scoffs. “What exactly is it that you love? These panic episodes? The mood swings? Do you love the way I act like I’m acting right fucking now? This isn’t ideal. I don’t see how I can ever make this work. I’m going to ruin you, Nora.”

The words make me angry and hurt. Who said that he got the say in everything between us? He doesn’t get to decide what I appreciate about him or what I find ideal for me.

“God, would you stop with all this assuming bullshit!?” He flinches.“I love being with you because I get tickled by every foul word that rolls off your tongue. I love being with you because you challenge me and because you make me laugh—like, actually, really laugh. And most of all, I love being with you because I get to see this side of you that barely anyone else gets the bliss of knowing.

“Do you remember what you told me, Theo? About how your mind is quiet when we’re together. Well, it’s the same for me, too.”

He doesn’t say anything back to that; he just stands there beneath the stream of water, staring at me.

“Is it me? Because if you don’t want me—or us—orwhatever the hell this is, then just say the words. I won’t bother you anymore. But if this is your way of telling me what’s best for me, then you don’t have a say.”

“It’s not you,” he mutters. “It’s not that simple, Nora.”

“Yes, it is. It’s a simple question. Do you want me or not?”

“Yes,” he sighs, “Fuck, you know I do.”

I peel his oversized T-shirt off of my body, letting it fall to the floor, along with my panties, before stepping into the steamy downpour with him. I take a step toward him, allowing the water to soak my skin.

“Then just be with me.” I press my naked body against his back and allow my hands to trail to the expanse of his chest. “Tell the thoughtsrunning through your head to shut up and let us be. Stop trying to push me away just because you think I can’t handle this.”

Finally, after several long moments, he turns to me. His eyes search mine as if they’re looking for some kind of a loophole in what I just said. I place his hand against the soft skin of my stomach, leading it up until it’s covering my breast. Theo’s breath hitches as his palm meets the pebbled flesh, but I encourage him to touch me, clutching his hand tighter.

“Say the exact words,” I breathe.

“I want you.” He wraps his other hand around the small of my back and draws me against him. “I want every fucking morsel of you, Nora.”

“You don’t need my permission.” He moans as I reach down and grip his already-hard penis, starting to stroke it slowly. “I’m all yours if you let yourself have me.”

Maybe we just need to let our bodies help us speak.

Theo grabs onto my wet hair, tugging my head back so that it’s tilted to his advantage. His mouth collides with mine, and I let my thoughts dissipate to nothing but the feel of his lips and the dominance of his hands as they begin exploring my body. He sucks the skin of my neck between his teeth as he brings his palm down to the apex of my legs. My back meets the tiled wall of the shower as his body presses against mine, and his hand starts massaging my cunt.

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