Page 56 of Meet Me at the Metro

“Your room,” I admit. “I used to go toWiltonswith my Dad all the time when I was little.” The name falls from my lips before I have time to stop it. I push away my father’s memory as quickly as it resurfaces. “I knew they had Barbara Streisand nights on Mondays, and I connected it with all those posters you have of her on your walls.”

I would never admit it out loud, but I loved the way she decorated my old room at the flat—the way playbills and musical posters wallpapered nearly every inch of its four walls.

“I forgot about you seeing my room.” Her eyes immediately fall away from mine.

I’m suddenly remembering how that last night ended for the both of us.

God, I hate thinking about the way I acted after my near episode. For the past few days, I couldn’t stand replaying our argument over and over again in my head. I’ve been such an asshole to her, and all for the sake of keeping myself from opening up to her. I would do anything to have the opportunity to make a better and more meaningful impression.

“I was a dick to you that night,” I blurt. “I was such a dick, and I didn’t mean it. I didn’t really mean any of it. You didn’t deserve the way I acted toward you.”

“It’s fine,” she whispers. “I probably shouldn’t pry into things. You weren’t ready to talk.”

The air between us grows thick at the sudden change of conversation, but I refuse to back down from its heaviness this time. “That still doesn’t excuse me for acting like I did, Nora. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for ruining the night like I did and that I wasn’t able to help you out more. You were hurt, and I couldn’t even pull myself together and help clean and bandage you up.”

“You don’t have to apologize for that. Look at me, Theo,” she commands. “Do you understand? You helped me more than you want to give yourself credit for. You made sure I made it home safe. Made sure I changed out of my freezing clothes. Made sure I had ice for my foot. That meant a lot to me.”

“It’s not just that,” I sigh.

She’s too forgiving.

Words fail me. There’s so much I want to say to her but so much that I’m afraid to admit. My fingers nervously trace the table as I try to calm the restless thoughts running through my mind. As if Nora can sense my uneasiness, she gives my hand a light squeeze, and a sense of peace settles over me. Her skin is electricity as it connects with mine, and somehow, I find the courage to speak again.

“I shouldn’t have dismissed what you said because nothing you said was wrong. You were right that night. I shouldn’t be back and forth with you the way that I am. It’s not fair to you, andfuck—I’m tryingso hard to keep my shit together and figure everything out because I do like you. This just scares me.”

“What scares you?Me? You’rescared ofme?”

A smirk crawls across my lips as I realize how foolish what I just said was, considering our circumstances. I was the one who was being a dick to her, not the other way around.

“I never intended to scare you, Nora. I would never want you to be afraid of me.”

“Pssh, I’m not scared of you,” she snorts, brushing off my concern. “Tell me why I scare you. Why doesthisscare you?”

“Y-you just,” I stutter so fucking pathetically. “It’s just getting harder to hold my guard up around you.”

“I don’t want you to hold your guard up around me. I’ve told you this.”

“I know, but I can’t help but try to. I’m terrified of putting too much of my mess on you—on anyone, for that matter. It ended up being too much for Millie, and the thought of it being too much for you is so fucking heavy.”

“Can I ask who Millie is?” She asks the question so sweetly.

And while I would’ve denied her the answer, this time, I find myself unable to do so. “She’s my ex. We’ve been broken up for a long while.Years. I’ve moved on, but it was just a lot at the time. Things started getting bad with my mental health toward the end of our relationship, and she ended up cheating on me and left. That’s not to say I’m blaming her for leaving because I understand it. I’m a lot, Nora. I’m fucked up.”

“Don’t say that. Don’t say you’re fucked up, alright?” She looks at me with such sincerity as she tells me, “You’re more than your bad days, Theo. I’m sorry things ended the way they did with Millie, but I don’t want you to be scared of this between us because Ireallylike this. I like our stupid little banter. And I like that you’re opening up to me. I want to know you more.”

Our sentimental moment turns sour as a waiter steps up to our table, two plates of food in his hands. “One prawn and chive dumpling and one vegetable dumpling?”

“Yeah,” I bite out, annoyed by his inconvenient timing.

“Is there anything else I can get for you two?”

“No, I think we’re all good here,” Nora answers. “Thanks.”

I’m thankful it was her and not me because I’m not so sure my words would have come out as friendly.

Dinner passes with Nora cramming vegetable dumplings in her mouth voraciously, and I find myself profoundly impressed when she finishes her plate minutes before me. I ended up feeling grateful for the interruption in our heavy conversation earlier because it allowed us to have a much more light-hearted one for the remainder of our meal.

I know I have a lot more to tell her, but for now, it can all wait. I just want to enjoy this moment for what it is.

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