Page 95 of Gratification in Gluttony

“I ain’t ready for you to talk shit about him, okay?” Toni warned, and Gem settled with an annoyed huff. “But as I was sitting there, I realized you were right. I didn’t want to be his dirty, little secret. So I left.”

“What did Ollie do?”

“He was in the bathroom when I left.”

“You’re nicer than I would have been,” Gem said, and he wasn’t lying.

“I’m not mad at him, not really. I don’t know his reasons, and maybe he’ll tell me one day so I can understand. But I’m not mad. I didn’t wanna hurt him.”

“But you’re hurt,” Gem said, and Toni shrugged.

“A little.”

“Toni.”

Heaving a deep breath, Toni continued tracing the red swirls. “Yeah, I’m hurt. I was too much Toni, you know? Brought it on myself.”

“No, you didn’t. You just love so hard, and not everyone knows what to do with that.” Gem pecked the top of his head as his lower hands rubbed soothingly over Toni’s back and spinal fin. “I’m proud of you for leaving. I know boundaries are hard.”

“I just couldn’t stay in his room,” Toni said.

“And you shouldn’t have had to. You did the right thing.”

“Then why do I feel like shit?” Toni grumbled, and Gem tightened his embrace.

“Sometimes, doing the right thing feels shitty. Doesn’t mean it was wrong.”

They lay in silence for a long time, and Toni’s lids grew heavy. “Can I sleep here?”

“I figured that was a given.”

Toni lifted off Gem’s chest enough for Gem to reach out and click the side table lamp off, bathing the flat in darkness. Moonlight filtered through the curtains, and Toni studied Gem’s face as he settled back on the bed.

“What?” Gem asked, eyes blinking discordantly.

“Where were you, by the way?”

A fang caught his bottom lip, dimpling the skin. “Went for a walk.”

“A walk?”

“Yeah, to clear my head.” Opening his arms in invitation, Gem waved Toni back in, and he went, snuggling back into Gem’s side.

“Where’d you walk?”

He felt Gem’s hesitance as he said, “The Point.”

“What the fuck were you doing at The Point? That’s, like, fancy vacation condos for Pride dickheads!”

“I know that! We were just walking okay?”

That brought Toni up short. “We?”

The hand rubbing Toni’s fin paused. “Oh, uh, Rusty was with me.”

Out of everything that Gem could have said, for some reason, that confused Toni the most. “What?”

Heaving a huge sigh, Gem said, “That’s what I was trying to tell you earlier, when you wouldn’t get off your phone.”

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