Page 58 of All Our Ghosts

I start to recognize the area as he hits the highway, it looks like the route Holden took when we went to the bridge. It's not long until he makes a turn into a neighborhood I don't recognize and onto a side road. A small secluded home comes into view and, in front of it, a small travel trailer.

Dex kills the bike once again and climbs off, helping me in the uneven driveway. “This is his home?”

He lets out a breath, "it was Becca's home. It was the only thing left after..." Dex taps my helmet before tugging it gently off of my head. I move towards the house but his hand wraps around my forearm stopping me. "Nash won't be in there. He lives in the trailer and hasn't been in the house since she passed."

I knew the feeling. After the first night home from the hospital and the night I spent in the nursery, I couldn't bring myself to go back in there. Maria helped me pack the room and sell the furniture that took up the space. Every time I thought about going in there, I only felt anger and like I was a failure for what happened. Maria constantly reminded me that it wasn't my fault, but it did nothing to quiet the little voice in my head that screamed at me every time I passed the nursery door. My chest aches knowing that Holden has experienced the same.

"Hey, you comin'?" Dex asks. He had already made a few strides over to Holden's trailer while I was lost in thought. I take a deep breath and nod, not knowing what to expect.

“I don’t see his bike, Dex, he’s not here.” I point out glancing around as we approach the door.

He looks down at me before knocking. "He sometimes parks his bike in the garage," Dex countered and I knew it was a lie only to make me feel better and to make me not lose hope that he ran home.

We wait for a few moments, listening for any sounds that might come from the inside of the trailer, but as Dex knocks again, the sound only bounces off of the emptiness inside. My shoulders slump. He isn't here and I'm still not entirely sure if he was at the club but after a third round of knocks I shake my head.

"Can we go back now?" I ask, the question coming out more pained than I wanted it to. Dex's gaze finds mine and reluctantly he nods.

"We'll find him." He reassures me by leading me back to his bike. Silence settles between us, uncomfortable and tight. I had been so sure before and now... now I don't know what to believe.

COLE

The warehouse is dark as usual when Trey and I pull up, the only noise around is the sound of our engines until we both shut off our bikes. I hate this place. Every time we come here, something gets even more fucked up than the last.

“Stokes’s not even here yet,” Trey sighs, climbing off his bike.

I shrug. “Probably waiting for us to arrive before he graces us with his presence.”

Deep down, I’m grateful Stokes hasn’t shown up yet. We need a break and something to hold over his head. Him not showing up to a meeting he called would give me the ammo to avoid him that much longer.

Trey nods. He’s been suspiciously less chatty since we left the clubhouse, and even though I already know why, I enjoy the chatter. It keeps the nagging voice in my head at bay long enough for me to be able to think.

“You think Nash is good?” Trey asks, pulling open the metal door, the creak of it hard against my hearing.

“No,” I say plainly. I know he’s not. I’ve only seen that look in Holden’s eyes twice and the first time, I lost my friend to grief and alcohol until recently.

Trey nods. “You wanna tell me why we’re risking the club for this girl?”

“We aren’t risking the club.” It's a lie, and from the look Trey shoots me he knows it too.

“Right, so letting a random woman who apparently is now a fugitive and missing person live above the shop is not putting the club at risk?” He shakes his head. “Remind me, wasn’t it you who said we keep our business in the inner circle? She’s been here for a week, O’Neil and she already knows way too much about the shit we’re in, more than any of the other Lunas that walk around the club.”

I scoff. “If you think the Lunas don’t know about the shit that happens at that table, you’re clearly more oblivious than I thought.” Trey never questions me unless warranted and even then I hate it. This ismyclub,mymen. I have final say. “And since when do you question my decisions?” I ask, turning to my vice president.

“I’m only curious as to why Nash, you, and now Wolfe have a fascination with helping Kadence.” He shrugs. “Especially after what happened to Becca.”

My jaw clenches at her name. Becca is still a sore subject and Trey knows that. "I'm helping herbecauseof what happened to Becca." Which isn't the total truth but Trey seems to believe me when he sighs. "If this asshole is truly after Kade then... we should help her."

“But why?” Trey questions again.

Why did I want to help her so bad? I could have treated her like any other customer, but instead I treat her like a bird with a broken wing and coddle her. Offered her a job, a place to stay.All because in those green eyes, I saw a familiar face. Scared, worried and terrified of the world around her.

“Look.” Trey straightens himself. “I know you couldn’t save Becca,”

“Falcone–” I growl in warning.

“No, Cole, you couldn’t save her. None of us could. But I figured dragging some innocent chick into our shit would be the last thing that you’d do. You can’t save them all.”

I lunge at him, my hands fisting around the collar of his cut as I shove him against the closest wall. My chest heaves with the anger I'm failing more and more to keep hidden.

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