Page 120 of All Our Ghosts

I take a deep breath and pick up the test. Enough time has passed that the test should be ready. I look down at it and my heart stops.

“Kade?” Reaching over, I open the door. Tears fall down my cheeks as I show Blake the test. Her eyes go wide before looking back up at me. “Oh, honey,” she says softly, throwing her arms around my neck and hugging me tightly.

Our lives are about to change and our world just got a little bigger.

KADENCE

“Kade, sweetheart, what are you doing?” Marlowe’s voice echoes from behind me in the doorway of the small kitchen.

I spin around, sighing. “Iwastrying to make dinner for the guys but I’m failing pretty hard right now.” I’m trying to make my father’s chili. Something I haven’t had since I was a kid and something I’m trying to make from memory. A feeling of defeat washes over me as Marlowe steps into the kitchen, wrapping an arm around my waist.

“I’m sure whatever you’re going to make them, they’ll eat just fine.” She smiles. “Do you mind me asking why you decided to do this?”

“I wanted to give them something in return for taking care of me.” I sound like a child when I say it. I’ve never had anyone do as much as the club has for me and it’s a weird feeling to finally feel cared for. My hand slides over my stomach, a soft smile playing on my lips as I think about the child growing within me.

“You know they’d do it even without the chili.” Marlowe laughs softly, picking up the wooden spoon I’m cooking with and stirsthe pot once more before taking a taste. I watch her with a quiet nervousness hoping it doesn’t taste nearly as bad as I think it does. “Needs some more cumin and it’ll be perfect,” she finally says after a moment and it makes me smile.

“I knew it,” I laugh softly searching the pile of spices I’ve collected.

Marlowe leans against the counter next to the stove, watching me. My stomach flips as I add a few dashes of cumin to the chili again. Both of us are silent as I work. Other than Blake, no one else knows about the pregnancy and I’m not sure if I’m going to tell anyone other than Blake until Holden gets back. There's a lingering sense of dread that fills me every time I think about telling him. I have no idea how he's going to react. We promised everything to each other, and even though we're moving at the speed of a freight train, this feels too soon. Despite that, I already called the doctor who saw me at the hospital to make an appointment once Holden is home. I want to experience those first moments with him. The ultrasounds, the check-ups, all of it. Knowing how much he cares about me is the only thing keeping me grounded and able to sleep at night.

“You’re good for them,” Marlowe finally says after a few moments. “Holden and Cole,” she clarifies.

“That’s what I keep hearing,” I say softly looking over at her. “I don’t want to be a wedge between them but they’re both probably two of the most stubborn men I’ve ever met.”

Marlowe laughs. “You should have seen them when they were boys.” A warm smile passes over her features as if she’s remembering something from their past.

“How long have you known them?” I glance over at Marlowe, stirring the chili again.

“Most of their lives. Cole came to Tony and me when he was four, but Tony knew Holden’s father from the club. Came up inthe military together, started the club together.” Marlowe sighs, “It was a different lifetime then.”

“Cole came to you?” I ask, setting down the spoon.

Marlowe nods softly. “I couldn’t have children. Tony and I adopted Cole when he turned five. No one really knows what happened to his parents.”

“Did you know his parents?”

“Sort of? They were a couple who had moved into town, a little cabin not far from my home. One day Cole wandered into our backyard. Tony found him huddled up in the gazebo and when we tried to take him back home his parents were…” Her voice trails off and she shakes her head as if to rid herself of the memory. “We took him in after that. No one really questioned it, no one really wanted the responsibility of a child, but Cole and Holden made quick friends and the fact that we practically fell in love with him, it was an easy decision to make.”

I realize that’s the reason Cole calls her ‘Ma’.

A twinge of pain aches through my heart. The idea of a small Cole scared and alone wrenches at my heartstrings. “That must have been horrible for him.”

“It helped that he was so young when it all happened. For a while he didn’t understand that his parents had passed, but pretty soon he latched onto us.” She smiles again, glancing over at me.

“Holden hasn’t really talked a whole lot about his family. Other than Becca,” I say softly, wrapping my arms around myself.

“I can’t imagine why he would. His father, although a great club member, wasn’t the best father. We were all relieved when that bastard died.” Marlowe says.

“That’s a little harsh, don’t you think?”

“If you knew half of the things he put Holden and Becca through, you wouldn’t think that.” Marlowe shakes her headagain and moves to taste the chili. I get the feeling that the conversation is over as soon as the spoon hits Marlowe’s lips and she smiles. “It’s perfect.”

I nod, but it’s sullen.

“He’ll tell you everything when he’s ready, sweetheart. Some of those wounds are still fresh,” she says, setting down the spoon. “I have to say, I’m happy he’s found love in you. I didn’t think he’d ever settle down with someone.”

My eyes land on Marlowe. “What do you mean?”