Page 83 of Ordinary Girl

I frown, because that kind of talk makes Skip sound weak. Like he’s giving up on her. “You think of her like a daughter, right?” I ask what I hope is a rhetorical question.

“She’s family.”

“So why would you want her anywhere near him? For Christ’s sake, you controlled her every fucking move for months after Sofia died, why are you suddenly so keen to let her havethiskind of freedom?”

“Becauseshe’s family.” Skip’s eyes bore into mine. “I want her to trust me. And you should be the last one who’s complaining about Ana having freedom because, believe me, if I thought I could actually stop her from doing anything, she wouldn’t be anywhere near you.”

I drag a hand through my hair and turn away, sighing quietly. “This is a mess.”

“You got that right.”

And I don’t know where it came from, or how long it’s been lying dormant, but all of a sudden there’s a fight welling up inside of me that I can’t hold in anymore. “I fucking care about her, Skip. I care about what happens to her.”

“We all do.”

“It’s not the same. I want her in my life. I want her withme.”

Skip’s expression doesn’t waver. Stoic as ever. “You love her?”

I take a breath. A deep one. “I don’t know what the fuck love feels like, I don’t know how I’msupposedto feel, all I know is I will kill anyone who hurts her. Anyone who tries to take her away, anyone who threatens her, I’ll fucking end them.”

Skip’s eyes are dark, but he’s smiling now. “I never wanted her anywhere near any of you lot, but hearing you talk like that, you genuinely care for her, don’t you?”

I wasn’t sure, before. I think I’d tried to block out those feelings because they confused and scared me, but they’re refusing to lie low now. And Skip doesn’t need an answer to that question. He knows.

“Then I guess we’re taking Emil Renard down, along with the Hawks. He chose the wrong side to play with first. He’s a threat we don’t need, a threat Ana doesn’t need, so we take him down. Call a meeting for tomorrow, let’s get this shit done.”

“And then what?” I ask.

“And then I’m out of here. And you take over.”

“Replacing Presidents isn’t always that simple.”

Skip eyes me warily. “You don’t want the job?”

To be completely honest, I don’t know. I don’t. “I want the job.” But it’s easier to tell him what he wants to hear. His head isn’t the only one that’s all over the place right now. I’m not sure I’m thinking straight, either.

“Then you take over. I’m in charge here, Joel. What I say goes. Everyone respects you, they listen to you, why the fuck would I want anyone else to run this place?”

“Do you still want Ana to go with you? When you leave?”

“What I want and what’s going to happen are two very different things.” Skip sits back down at the head of the table in the chapel. “Ana’s got her own mind, she knows what she wants,all I can do is hope she’ll visit once I’m settled. She might even bring you with her, if you’re lucky.”

Skip smirks, and it’s a gesture that lightens the mood, a little.

“Do you really think she might want to see Renard off her own back? He is her dad, after all.”

“You’ve spoken to her about this more than I have, Joel. What doyouthink?”

“I don’t know.” I don’t know much when it comes to Ana, that’s something that’s becoming more and more obvious. “I have no idea what’s going on in her head.”

“Yeah, well, that makes two of us. Look, just keep an eye on her. If she does start seeing him, we might need to watch her even more closely. Given what we think we know now, she could be putting herself in the middle of something she really doesn’t want to get caught up in.”

I leave the chapel, a million thoughts going round in my head, and none of them are making any sense, but I’ve got to focus here. I’ve got to get my head in the game, I’m going to be running this club very soon, sooner than I’d like. And when I do take over I want this place to be stable. Free of the shit we’re currently involved in. I want Renard dealt with and out of Ana’s life, I want the Hawks put in their place: brought down by us, we need to win this war because, if we don’t, I haven’t got a fucking clue what’s going to happen…

Thirty-Four

Ana