Page 78 of Ordinary Girl

“I’m done. Dad.”

And I walk away, out of the house I’d so badly wanted to go back to, in the beginning. But now, I have a new home. One I’m forcing myself to get used to, because I can’t go back. I can’t bring Mama back, I can’t change what happened. I canonly move forward, and I’m trying to do that. I’m walking away from that house, and a man who claims he’s changed but I don’t believe him. And there were a hundred more questions I wanted to ask him, but now wasn’t the time. I need to talk to Joel: Iwantto talk to Joel, not that man in there. He isn’t a part of my life, he never was. But Joel, maybe he is. Maybe…

I let her go, because she’ll be back. She’s not done, no matter what she just told me. I could see it in her eyes, she wants to know why I’m really back, but I can’t tell her that. She could work it out, of course, she’s smart, and that’s fine. And if she does work it out for herself I’ll be interested to see what she does with that information, would she tell those men who took her under their wing? The men who protected her. Men I want to bring down, and yes, they protected my daughter when she needed protecting, but they are also to blame for Sofia’s death. The Blackhawks, they too are to blame, they were the ones who pulled the trigger: the ones who killed her. They took my wife down with a single bullet, one that wasn’t meant for her but that is irrelevant. And then there’s me. I’m to blame for all of it, I started the whole messed-up domino effect that led to Sofia’s death: that led to my daughter becoming involved with an outlaw motorcycle gang. It was my fault, but the only way I can deal with that guilt: the only way I can try to get my daughter back is to bring those two clubs down. Capitalize on the hate they already feel for each other. Push them toward an end game they were always going to come to anyway, at some point. But I need to make sure Ana isn’t caught in the crossfire. She will not succumb to the same fate as her mama, I won’t let that happen. Her involvement with the Viking Bandits is coming to an end, and I will make up for all the damage I caused, all the years I wasn’t with her. I will make up for all of it, and she’ll see that the new life I can giveher is what’s best for her. She’ll see that, because what I can give her is everything she’s been looking for since her mama died. And I could have told her now: gave her that information, now, but it’s too soon. She needs time, but I can’t give her too much of that. I need to move quickly, but I also need to be careful. I don’t want to push her away, I need her to come to me because it’s whatshewants. And shewillcome back, I know she will. In the meantime, though, I have work to do. The past is gone, the present can be dealt with: Ana’s future is with me…

Thirty-Two

Joel

Iwas right. She told me herself, Emil Renard is her estranged father. He told her he’s in Denmark because he wants to make amends for abandoning her and Sofia, but she doesn’t believe that. With good reason. He’s not telling her the whole truth, but that’s no surprise. He left out the fact he’s now heading up of one of the biggest crime families in Europe, he’s a dangerous man, with an agenda, he was never going to tell Ana that, was he? And teaming up with the Blackhawks to get to us: he’s looking for some retribution of his own, of course he is. This man is one we need to watch closely, for so many reasons.

“So, what do we do now?”

“She needs to keep seeing him.” Skip leans back, tipping his chair so it’s resting only on its two back legs, his feet up on his desk. “She needs to keep those channels of communication open. She needs to get him talking.”

“She’s not going to go for that.”

“Then make her see sense.”

“Why the fuck is this all on me?”

“Because you’re the closest person to her right now, Joel. Whether I like it or not.” He lights up a cigarette and takes a long drag. “She talks to you.”

“She talks to you, too. She trusts you now.”

“Not as much as she trusts you. She still thinks I’m going to force her to come away with me, and quite honestly, I’m not dropping that idea.” He takes another drag on his cigarette, blowing smoke up at the ceiling. “Maybe Renard isn’t lying when he tells her he wants them to start over. Make a new lifetogether.” He drops his chair back on all four legs and leans over the desk, elbows down, cigarette pointing at me. “That isn’t happening, Joel. Over my dead fucking body is she going with him. He’s come to take us down, it’s fucking obvious now.”

“So why work with the Hawks? They killed his fucking wife, it was their bullet that hit her, not ours.”

Skip gets up, comes around the front of the desk and leans back against it, arms crossed. “He’s obviously a clever man, and a dangerous one. The Balke family don’t employ weak people, so whatever he’s doing, there’ll be a reason. Keep eyes on the Hawks’ compound and Renard’s house. And tell Ana what she needs to do.”

“Why don’tyoutalk to her? You keep claiming she’s like family to you but you pass all the fucking dirty work onto me.”

“Because you’re going to be in my shoes one day, Joel. And that day isn’t far away now.”

“Jesus, Skip, this isn’t fair on her.”

“She can handle it. She’s not that same girl who first came to us, she’s all grown up now. She’s tough. She’s strong. And she’s capable of doing this. Go on, get out of here. I’m going to call Rik, fill him in, see what he can do to help us.”

I leave Skip’s office and head back out into the clubhouse, but Ana isn’t there. She was, before I went to talk to Skip, but now she’s gone.

“Where’d Ana go?” I ask Jep.

“She and Cady went to the store. It’s the official opening tomorrow, they want to make sure everything’s ready.”

“Okay. Thanks.” I need to talk to her, need to tell her what Skip’s expecting her to do, even though I don’t agree with it. I feel like I’m putting her in harm’s way, and yeah, the irony of that isn’t lost on me. But the thought of her being in any kind of danger, it fucking kills me.

The door to the store is open, and as I park up out front the sound of music and laughter drifts out from inside. I hear her voice, and she sounds happy. She’s made a good friend in Cady, and that’s important. She’s making a life for herself here, and that in turn means, I hope, that she really is serious about staying. With me? I hope so, even though there’s a part of me that knows this world isn’t hers. And it shouldn’t be hers, but she’s chosen to live in it, now. Her choice. Nobody forced her, least of all me.

“Hey.” I flash a grin in their direction, and they both look up from behind the counter, big grins thrown right back at me from both of them. “Everything good here?”

“Everything’s fine,” Ana replies as she and Cady exchange a look. “Is something up?”

“No.”

She eyes me warily, frowning slightly, and I sigh quietly, dragging a hand back through my hair.

“Can I have a word?”

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