Page 68 of Toy Boy

She looks at me, smiles, and comes over. I slip an arm around her waist and pull her against me, and she grabs my shirt collar and yanks me forward, kissing me deep and slow.

“There you go. There’s your second.”

She grins at me and steps out of my arms, and I can’t help smiling. She’s been good for me, even though I hate to admit it. She’s kept my mind occupied, stopped me from thinking too much about Megan, but not completely. That could never happen. She’s a beautiful distraction, but that’s all she’ll ever be.

“Tania?”

She reaches the kitchen door, and spins around on her heels. “Another second?”

“A very quick one. I promise.”

“Okay.”

“You do understand, don’t you? That what we’re doing here…”

“No strings. No ties. No commitment. I understand, Scott. And believe me, right now, I really can’t think about anything long-term, what we have here is perfect.”

“I just wanted to make sure.”

She sighs quietly, puts her bag down on the floor and comes back over to me, her fingers once more tugging at my collar. “I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“You won’t hurt me, Tania.”

“I’m not talking about me. I’m talking about Megan.”

I take her hands in mine and drop my gaze, watching as my thumbs stroke hers. And I don’t say anything, because I don’t know how to respond.

“You want her back, don’t you? You really are serious about that?”

“You know I am.”

“I’d hoped you might see sense.”

I look at her, smiling slightly. “You don’t think she’ll ever take me back, huh?”

“How can I possibly know that? I just think – I think you should be concentrating on moving forward. Looking back, it isn’t always healthy.”

“He won’t be here forever, Tania. Xander, his time in the bay is temporary.”

“And you’re hoping that once he’s gone, she’ll come running back to you?”

“Of course I don’t. It was never going to be that simple… Look, I wouldn’t blame you for walking away from me, none of this is fair…”

“I’m not going anywhere. I like your company, we get on, and the sex is amazing, what’s not to like? We’re agreed this isn’t a long term thing, so let’s just keep on doing what we’re doing and see where it takes us. Okay?”

I once more drop my head and squeeze her hands and I don’t think I deserve this woman.

You didn’t deserve Megan.

Do you deserve anyone…?

“Okay.”

“And if, by some chance, things change between you and Megan then I will smile, I will walk away and wish you all the luck in the world, and then I’ll move onto Rob from accounts because he is ripped!”

I laugh as she lets go of me and heads back towards the door, picking up her bag and throwing me one last smile.

“Want to meet up at The Swan tonight? For pie, chips and some no-strings-attached grown-up fun? No pressure, but, you know, I’m free, if you feel like it. Give me a call, alright?”

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