Page 42 of Toy Boy

“Not because she wanted to seeme, then?”

Greta Featherstone is still determined to make no effort in welcoming me back to Beachcastle Bay. But that’s no surprise. For some reason she’s finding it harder than anyone else to forgive what I did to Megan, but she’ll have her reasons. It’s not a problem.

“She’ll be over soon.” He gives my shoulder another friendly slap. “It really is good to have you back, Scott.”

I’m beginning to think he’s one of the few to say that, and mean it, and I’m not enjoying this feeling of self-pity I seem to be experiencing, I need to snap out of it.

Downing the whiskey Tim gave me, I slam the empty tumbler down on the window sill and make my way through the crowded living room towards the open French doors that lead out onto a huge, decked terrace and sprawling garden, a near-perfect lawn lined with apple and pear trees, and flower beds full of rose bushes and colourful shrubs. It’s a warm evening, so a lot of people have moved out here, making the most of the garden furniture set up under the string-light-strewn branches – not my work. I have a gardener who takes care of all the outdoor space, and a couple of cleaners who look after indoors. Megan never liked having any outside help, but I’m all for it. I don’t have time to mow lawns or dust living rooms, I’m a busy man. Not busy enough tonight, though. I need more distractions, and this party isn’t offering up anywhere near the amount I thought it would. I also need another drink, and I head over to a small outdoor bar set up on the terrace, grab a fresh whiskey, and wander down into the garden.

“You don’t look as if you’re enjoying yourself.”

Tania’s voice startles me, and I spin around to see her standing behind me, tall and beautiful in a striking rust-colored dress and heels, her red hair tied in a side ponytail that’s draped across her left shoulder. And for a moment I’m taken aback, I’d forgotten how different she looks out of her more conservative work clothes.

“Sorry, Tania, I was in a world of my own there.”

“Anything you want to talk about?”

“No.” I shoot her a smile, and she sips her drink, her eyes meeting mine over the rim of her martini glass.

“So,areyou enjoying yourself?”

I lean back against the bar and look around me, at the crowd of people spilling out from inside onto the terrace and into the garden. “I don’t think it matters whether I’m enjoying myself or not. As long as everyone else is, that’s all I care about.” I shift my gaze back to Tania. “Areyouenjoying yourself?”

“Oh, I’m never one to turn down a party, and this is a pretty good one.”

I laugh, so does she, and the air is suddenly filled with the smell of her perfume, a light, bright summery scent. Not that different to the perfume Megan liked to wear…

“Penny for them?”

I give my head a little shake, and frown.

“Is my company that bad?” The corner of her mouth lifts slightly, and I realise I must’ve drifted off again.

“Of course not. I’m so sorry, it’s just – I have a lot on my mind at the minute.”

“Work?”

“Yes, work.” Amongst other things.

“You know what they say, Scott, all work and no play…”

She leaves that sentence hanging, but she doesn’t need to finish it.

“I love my work.”

“And that’s a good thing, but you should also learn how to switch off every now and again. Believe me, it can do you the world of good sometimes. Take it from someone who knows.”

“I’ve never really been able to switch off. It’s just the way I am.”

“Then maybe it’s time you changed. Time you started to live a little.” She finishes her drink and turns around, leaning over the bar to make herself a fresh one. “It’s never too late to make a new start, Scott.” Her eyes once more meet mine. “Again, take it from one who knows.” And then she sashays off, back inside, and I watch as she hugs Tim, leaving a hand on his shoulder as they chat away, and I look around to see where Greta is, because I’d love to see her reaction to Tania’s quite obviously innocent but still close proximity to her husband. Greta never was – and still isn’t – a tactile person. Tania is.

I stare down into my drink, and swirl what’s left of the amber-coloured liquid around the glass. I should probably start playing host again, this is my party after all, even if I probably am the only one not really enjoying it. Maybe I should take Tania’s advice and start trying to. And then I find myself wondering what Megan’s doing tonight, because she certainly isn’t here. Did I even invite her? I don’t think I did, but only because I knew she would never come. So, whatisshe doing tonight? Is she alone? Is she with someone…?

The fact that she could, quite possibly, be with another man, even though I have no proof that she is, causes me to down the last of my whiskey and immediately pour another one, and even though it’s none of my business what Megan is doing, or who she’s with, if she is, indeed, with anybody, it’s getting to me. It’s affecting me.

Megan can see who she wants.

Megan can date who she wants.

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