Page 71 of Dmitri

He inhales slowly and exhales even slower. “The trick is to always fight against the bad guy. You’re the hero in the cage, not the villain. You’re going against the worst of the worst and can stop at nothing until they surrender.”

Why does it sound likesurrenderis code for something worse?

“There’s less guilt that way,” he explains. “Fighting is just you serving justice. Silas only pits us against criminals and very bad men, Dmitri.”

Is he trying to say all this to scare me off? It’s not working. I’ll gladly take my pound of flesh from anyone who swings their fists at me since I can’t do it to the one who’s ruined my life… and my body.

“I can handle that.”

Dad’s expression falls. “You’re going to get hurt. Badly.”

“I can handle that, too.”

“This isn’t like a fight on the playground, kid. Even if you take on one of the younger guys closer to your age and weight, they won’t stop until you do. Understand me?”

“Yes.” I can’t wait to show my dad what I can do. To prove to myself that I’m not a whimpering little pussy who cowers under his mommy’s hateful hands. The kids I fight at school barely take the edge off my aggression and I need this more than I’ll ever tell my dad. Or my friends.

“I want to do this. With or without you, I’m going in the cage.” I hold his stare, which is nothing as heartless as my mothers, and wait for him to concede or drag me out of the gym.

“Okay,” he whispers, his shoulders falling. “Okay, Dmitri.”

The triumph feels like a loss, but I don’t know why. “I’ll fight the bad guy and win every time. Just watch me.”

Dad’s cheeks mottle with redness that splotches down his neck. “Just remember one last thing.” He presses his forehead to mine. “We’re all bad guys, D. Some of us are just better at hiding it than others.”

Crossing my arms, I keep staring at the floor. “Had to pick up his ashes and scatter them.” I couldn’t keep Dad’s remains. It would have driven me insane having him so close. Even dumping them in the river had my mental health snapping into pieces.

Ryker’s brow pinches. “You should have told me. I could have been there for you.”

“It’s not your place.”

“Itismy place, you asshole.” Ry slams his hand on the desk. “We’re fuckingfamily, D.”

He’s right, but that doesn’t mean I want to burden him with my past. Doing it while I was going through my Hell made me feel shitty enough. I’ve cried in his arms. I’ve hidden in his closet. I’ve beaten the shit out of him because I felt like it and he said I could.

We’ve been through too much already, and he’s finally ina better place, thanks to Tara. She’s been his Butterfly, and the love of his life, long enough for him to work through a lot of his demons and find closure with his past. I’m glad. Ryker deserves happiness because I might have had a rough upbringing, but Ryker’s was fucking devastating and it ruined him for a very long time. Tara’s changed a lot of that. She helped him find peace.

Can Daelyn do the same for me?

Holy shit. That I’d even consider that a possibility proves I’ve lost my ever-loving mind. I’m suddenly beyond grateful Daelyn ghosted me this morning. If she knows what’s good for her, she’ll stay away. If she doesn’t, I’ll fucking make her.

Time to move on and get back to what I’m best at. “So, what’s on the list for today?”

Ryker lets out a long sigh. “A delivery should be here shortly. Last night, we had an incident in the penthouse. Sophie was… tested.”

My hackles raise. “Who am I killing?”

No one disrespects Sophie on my watch.But you weren’t on watch, the angel on my shoulder reminds me.You were balls deep in pussy, being a selfish coward.

You mean getting grief out of your system so you could be a better member of society?The devil on my other shoulder argues.

“Vault took care of it,” Ryker says, cautiously. “And as of right now, you’re on leave.”

I shoot out of my chair so fast it knocks over. “What?”

“I don’t repeat myself.” Ry walks towards the door. “You need to work on yourself, D. That’s not going to happen if you’re distracted with work and pussy.”

“You motherfuckinghypocrite.” Rage has my vision hazing red. “You did the same thing I am when you made Tara the Butterfly.”

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