Page 119 of Going All In

“Sometimes you say things in the moment.”

“I’m calling bullshit on that.” Darcy couldn’t lie to her best friend. Ally always saw through her.

“Fine. Yes. I’m in love with him. But that wasn’t supposed to happen, and I’m not going to give up everything I’ve worked so hard for.”

“Hold up,” Ally said, holding up her hands. “You’re sliding into hysteria right now. Being in love with Jake isn’t going to derail your plans for school. You’re scared and you freaked out. You need to get it together. Jake loves you and you love him, and that’s all that matters.”

“But sometimes being in love isn’t enough. It’ll be better in the long run.” Fuck, she wished she believed that.

“Keep telling yourself that, but you’re giving up on something that might not still be there when you finally pull your head out of your ass.”

“Hey,” Darcy said, sitting up straight on the couch. “A little harsh. Shouldn’t you be on my side?”

“Not when you’re being an idiot. I love you, Darc, but so does Jake, and you are throwing that away.”

Ally grabbed Darcy’s hands. “Now, are you going to go talk to him? I know they are leaving for Vegas soon. Also, I can’t believe you would break his heart in the middle of playoffs.”

“I had to,” Darcy said, but she was beginning to doubt herself. Hell, she’d been doubting this decision since it first filtered into her brain after her missed meeting with Dr. Maguire.

Ally dropped Darcy’s hands and stood up from the coffee table. “Figure out what you want, Darcy. You’ve spent so many years focused on school. That’s not everything there is in life. Jake woke you up and made you happy, and that should count for something.”

“I know,” Darcy whispered, her regret building, even when her head warned her that they would’ve ended eventually. Every doubt and insecurity reared up, and she hated it.

“I know you’re not going to go over there now. You’re going to stew and study and probably stew some more. Just don’t take too long. The two of you fit. Everyone can see it. It stopped being fake almost from the beginning, if you can even be honest with yourself about that.”

“When did you become a relationship guru?” she asked.

“Don’t they say those who can’t, teach?” Ally said.

“Oh, Ally, is this about Dom? God, I’ve been a terrible friend. We haven’t talked about him in a while.” Darcy would do anything to change the subject.

Ally waved her hand. “It’s nothing. We had our fun, but it wasn’t anything more than that. I’ve been dating around. Nothing serious. And it’s not a big deal.”

“Ally.”

“No. I promise it’s not. Stop deflecting. You need to focus on figuring your shit out and talking to Jake soon.”

“I’ll think about it.”

Hell, that was probably all she would do. Which was exactly what the problem was to begin with.

Dammit. Why did she have to fall in love with him?

They had towin this game tonight. They didn’t want to go home tomorrow down three to two. If they won tonight, they could end the series at home in game six and then be on to round three, but it wasn’t looking good. He did not want to go to a game seven to decide this. Especially when the next team they played was St. Louis, who’d beaten Dallas in five games.

Tonight, the Strikers were down four to two at the end of the second period, and Bugsy had already ripped them a new one during the intermission. They were playing behind and needed to get back on track.

Jake’s numbers had been strong. He’d had three goals and five assists, including an assist tonight. He was plus five, but he was off. His head wasn’t fully in the game, and his heart sure as hell wasn’t. He couldn’t stop playing that night over and over, and it was fucking with his head. It’d been two days since Darcy had dropped that bomb and made him question how he hadn’t seen it coming.

He knew she was stressed with school, and he’d still convinced her to come to games and team parties. She might’ve protested and said she had to focus on school, but she always gave in quickly. He thought she was okay with everything. That she loved him as much as he loved her. They’d even said the words a few times.

Had it meant nothing to her?

Fuck, he’d never been in this situation before. He’d worked his ass off to make sure he was never in this situation. His mom was right. Don’t get invested and then it won’t hurt when they leave.

Aside from his mother and grandmother and Toula, he’d never believed any of the other women that casually threw out I love yous. He tended to bail like his ass was on fire when the words fell from their lips. But not Darcy. He craved those words from her. Not from the beginning, because that would be insane, but he struggled to find the exact moment when he fell in love with her. But the moment she’d crushed his heart—he’d remember that forever.

He hated that he’d stormed out of her apartment, but he knew that reasoning with Darcy at that moment wasn’t going to happen. Though he thought she would’ve reached out by now. The silence was getting to him.

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