He pulls back sharply and blinks at her, looking rather refined in his dark grey suit. “What?”
Kara spells it out. “One. Single. Drink. Maybe two, if I’m feeling very generous. I don’t trust you.” She doesn’t trust him, nor does she trust herself. Unfortunately, she may need some liquid courage for what he has planned.
Not quite caring or understanding her reasoning, Calais scoffs. “Fine. Either way, I’ll meet you there. We’ll have a drink.” His tone turns mocking, “Like we’re already alovingcouple.”
“Are you asking me on a date? What sort of dippy sap are you? What the fuc-”
Ignoring her, placing a hand over her mouth, Calais continues, softening dangerously. “Then, we will get in an argument,just like couples do. I’ll pay the bill and we will go home tofinish our argument. When we walk in the door, I’m going to do what I want and you willtryand stop me. You’ll get what you need and I’ll get mine.” He pauses, an ugly little grin shaping his lips. “The best part is that it will feel real, because I’m going to be angry and you’re going to be scared.”
It takes a few moments to absorb the words. The scene he paints is obscene, yet exciting. A night out, like a normal couple, a sense of normalcy, only to end in a nightmare of fury and struggle. Her heart races, imagining him holding her down, bruising her. A fight that she’d lose. Her belly heats and Kara despises herself. She shouldn’t be like this. “That sounds like…a rape fantasy,” Kara replies carefully, watching his face. The words taste like blood in her mouth. “I don’t think I’m okay with that. That’s sick…and…wrong…”
“Will you knock it off?” He looks irritated, brow furrowed. “Who here is judging you?” He pretends to look around. “Me? I think not.”
He’s right. It’s almost like he’s echoing her psychiatrist. The woman always told Kara she’s the only one judging herself for her anger and for the circumstances that have shaped her. But, this is tasteless…vile. Morally bankrupt. She’s never done this with anyone. All her relationships ended because of the fighting she would always start.
The fighting, the arguments, because deep down she wanted to see what they looked like angry, their veins thick in their arms, blood hot under their skin, eyes vicious, ready to go at her.
It’s a lie. She’s actually done something like thisonce.
She’d been twenty-two and had a boyfriend that had a slow temper. However, when his temper broke, it was indeed something to behold. They’d been watching a movie in his basement, talking, when they had a severe disagreement. Kara had gotten so upset that she’d tried to leave the basement, to get away from him, but he grabbed her ankle and yanked her right back down the stairs.
They’d grappled on the basement floor, thankfully carpeted, and she’d dug her nails so deep into his arms that he’d bled from multiple gauges. When he grabbed her wrists to stop her, he’d squeezed so hard that she’d had to beg him to let go.
His response had been to tell her that if she stopped fighting him, it wouldn’t hurt so much.
She had sagged to the ground, lying on her back, panting. He was aroused, she could see his erection in his jeans. More horrifying; she was wet and horny. She knew it wasn’t a normal reaction to what had happened. After a few moments of calming down, he’d told her to go home.
Kara went home regretting that hehadn’tgone all the way, that he hadn’t ripped her shorts off and fucked his anger into her. He ended up breaking up with her shortly after; he hadn’t liked who he was when he was with her, apparently.
Fast forward to now with Nicholas Havenwood-Calais telling her that’s his wet fucking dream.
And, he’s not judging her or himself for wanting it.
“Just like that. No strings attached? No one has to know?”What are you saying!Kara thinks to herself in dismay, unable to stop the words from tumbling from her lips.Have you lost your mind, girl?
Calais looks downright predatory now, eyes dilated, as if he’s thinking through exactly what he wants to do to her. “Just like that. Very simple. Friday night.”
This is very high on a list of things Kara should never, ever entertain doing. Yet, here she is, thinking it through, sitting on a bad man’s desk with her legs spread as his eyes mock her. He wants to pretend he doesn’t care if she rejects him, but Kara can tell he wants her to say yes.
He wants it bad enough that he’s told her no judgement. That he sees himself in her, despite how disturbing that is.You don’t know who he really is. What if he’s involved with-
Before her mind can make the final leap into darkness by finishing that thought, Kara focuses on Calais, on his rapidly darkening gaze. Strangely exhilarated, yet horrified of herself, Kara hears herself uttering the terrible words, “Why not?” The final nail in her coffin.
Nicholas Havenwood-Calais smiles like an angel fallen far from heaven.
Kara already knows that he tastes like hell.
Chapter 16
She considers standing him up.
Kara beats herself up for a few nights, telling herself it’s all a rather terrible mistake. Only a fool would even consider meeting him with the intent of going home with him after, knowing his intent. Sadly, instead of being entirely repulsed, Kara is intrigued.
On Friday night, she puts on a sleek black skirt that hits mid-thigh and wears a tasteful white and black top that she can easily tuck into the skirt. It’s an outfit that makes her look slightly ‘too good’ in the way of sexuality, yet it doesn’t cross the line into trashy. Cubic zirconia in her ears and a dark choker around her neck bring some flash to the ensemble. With a flash of deviousness, she wears more makeup than she normally does, giving herself a smokier eye with dark shades of midnight and bronze.
A hint of red lipstick makes her feel like she’s looking for too much attention, but she sees plenty of girls seemingly get away with it in public. Why not her? Every time she sees someone with glamourous lipstick, she always thinks they look daring and bold. When it’s on her, she feels like a child playing dress up.
Looking at herself in the mirror, somehow sultry and mysterious, Kara decides she can play the game for tonight, her dark hair waving like the sea. She can truly wear a mask that she isn’t familiar with, on top of the mask she normally adorns.