Page 65 of Love Her

Chapter 29

Connor

My attitude and demeanor have been less than endearing the last two weeks. At least that’s what I’m told. By my co-workers, my sister, and now a pint-sized kid with a baseball hat that’s too big for his head. Unlike his mother, he doesn’t bite his thumbnail when he’s nervous. Actually, I don’t think he’s nervous to call me out on my shit. In fact, he’s quite sure of himself as he stands before me, hands resting on his hips with narrowed eyes.

“Jacob, grab your mitt and let’s work on some ground balls.”

“My mom was crying, Coach. We’re on the field so I’m calling you Coach, but so you know, she was crying. Then my Grammy drank wine with her, and they tried to say they weren’t crying together, but then that dumb movie was on that they always cry when the boy and girl kiss in the rain. I don’t know why the boy and girl kissing makes them cry but it does. Clem said they were lying because Mom is sad that you made her cry. Then Clem cried. Coach, all my family was crying! Except Pop. And me. But the rest were.”

His words flow between his lips so quickly I’m not sure I even understand what he’s saying. I know he’s telling me Lis was crying and there was wine and somehow, I’m to blame for them watching a movie. If he only knew how shitty I’ve been feeling. No, I haven’t cried, but I’ve not been okay either. These two weeks have sucked. Seeing her at practices and knowing her true feelings, that’s been the hardest.

Well, until today. After our last game, I offered to meet with a few of the players that struggled a little. Giving them a little more one-on-one attention. When I saw Lis’s dad cross the field with Jacob in tow, part of me was relieved while the other was disappointed. No matter how angry I am at being played like a fool, not seeing her is a bit of a letdown.

Mr. Remington only offered me a nod of his head in greeting. He’s been standing off to the side the entire time Jacob has berated me. I’m a little proud of the kid to be honest. Seeing him stand up for his mom reminds me of myself as a kid. It also makes it hard for me to reconcile the woman I was falling for with the words I heard her speak. How could someone with that ugliness in their heart raise such great kids?

“Jacob, I’m sorry to hear about all the crying. That must be tough to listen to.” I have no idea what I’m saying, but my little adversary nods in agreement.

Sighing, he releases his hands and hangs his head. “It’s bad, Coach. Can you buy my mom like a watch or a car or something? Clem told me when we lived with my dad and he would make Mom cry, he’d buy her fancy presents. Maybe if you did that she would stop.”

Isn’t that exactly the point? If I gave her expensive gifts, she’d be happy. I’d be the punk who was buying affection and love but hey, seems to be how things are done with Felicity.

Bending over so Jacob and I are eye level I say, “Look, bud, the stuff you’re talking about is adult business. Why don’t you just focus on being an awesome kid?”

“And baseball player.”

Smiling, I lift his hat off his head and muss up his hair while he groans and swats at my hand. “Come on kiddo, grab your glove and let’s see what you’ve got.”

Picking up the bucket of balls, I move behind home plate and follow Jacob as he rushes to his grandpa and his things. Catching Mr. Remington’s eye, he nods my direction. Did he hear what I said to Jacob? Hell, did he hear Jacob chastising me?

For the next hour I work Jacob over with drills. He’s filthy dirty and his practice pants are going to need a good soak but it’s worth it. Here on our own, without the other players and pressure of the game, he’s doing well. Most of all, he’s smiling and laughing. Demanding high fives from me and his grandpa.

“Okay, I think that’s enough for tonight. You did good, Jacob.”

“I know! I’m so ready for the game on Saturday.”

Following him as he runs toward Mr. Remington, I pick up a few of the balls he’s left behind, tossing them in the bucket. I chuckle at his antics, jumping around and reenacting the last ten minutes of our work as if we all haven’t been here.

“Coach, do you think I can play center field on Saturday?” he shouts as I turn and make my way toward where they stand.

“Maybe. We’ll have to see what Coach Owen has planned.”

“Jacob, why don’t you go run two laps around the bases.”

“Okay, Pop!”

Shifting the bucket from one hand to another, I’m not sure what to do. This is awkward as hell.

“That boy has a lot of energy. It probably doesn’t help that I let him have candy this afternoon. Lis will kill me if I bring him home bouncing off the walls.”

“Running is never a bad thing. He did well tonight. I think a few more practices like this, without the pressure and distraction of his teammates, will be helpful.”

“I agree.” Lis’s dad is quiet as we watch Jacob run. “Look, Connor, you seem like a good guy. I’m not one to get involved in my daughter’s business.”

A but is coming. I doubt I want to hear what is to follow, but I brace myself anyway.

“While I’m not sure exactly what is going on with you and my daughter, I know my girl hasn’t been the same the last few weeks. Well, that’s not true. She’s a lot like she was when she first came home. After everything that scumbag ex of hers put her through. It was nice to see her finding her way, lightening up. Laughing. I had almost forgotten her laugh.”

I don’t turn to face him or offer any sort of acknowledgment. We both watch Jacob round the bases and sliding when unnecessary.

“My wife is worried. She’s afraid Lis will take the kids and move away again. Lis has always struggled to find her place. Never feeling like she belonged here but not really sure where she was supposed to be. Lately, I’ve seen her making plans that included being here with us. It was like everything her mother and I had prayed for was coming to life.”

“Sir—”

“It isn’t my intention to pry. I wanted to thank you. You’ve made her happy. Made my grandchildren happy because their mother was laughing again. That’s all I wanted to say. Come on, Jacob. Time to get you home before your mama starts calling.”

Running our way at full speed, Jacob doesn’t stop and makes a beeline for the parking lot. Mr. Remington and I laugh at his antics, but nothing further is said. I heard him. I may not understand why he is giving me the credit for any happiness his family may have had but I take it to heart.

I take my time crossing the field to my truck. Once I’ve secured the equipment and bucket of balls in the bed, I climb into the cab and settle behind the wheel. Mr. Remington’s comments about Lis have served their purpose. I’m curious. Not just if she’s okay, but why she’s only started laughing. What was she like before I met her? Was she not vivacious? Outspoken?

For a few beats I consider texting her. I also consider driving to Doris’s for a few beers. I’m not ready to communicate with her in any fashion. Being out with a bunch of strangers holds no interest for me. Instead, I pull out of the parking lot and in the direction of my apartment. Another night off at home and alone. Tomorrow is a different day. At least tomorrow night, I’ll be at work.

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