Page 49 of Love Her

Chapter 22

Felicity

It’s been only a week since Connor and I had our first date. In many ways, it feels like a lifetime ago. Somehow, he’s found a place in my day-to-day life like he’s always been there. Whether it’s a coffee and pastry delivered with a smile and a kiss at his PT appointment or a simple text to tell me he’s thinking of me, this man is wooing me right into believing in things I thought were non-existent.

He’s appeasing me and keeping our relationship between only us for now. Although, I have a strong suspicion that is a topic he’s going to want to address sooner rather than later. Connor thinks he understands my reasons for waiting to go public but he’s only scratching the surface. Yes, I want to make sure he’s someone who is going to stick around for a while before I introduce my kids to him. They lost a life of luxury and traded that for living with grandparents they used to only see once or twice a year. Their father, who was never really around, has gone completely MIA from their lives. It wouldn’t be fair of me to bring someone around only to have him leave us too.

Deep down, I know that’s my true reason. Fear and disbelief he’ll stick around. While we haven’t touched on the topic of his friends, I know enough to think the moment they find out I’m the person he’s spending his time with they’ll convince him to dump me. I want to believe that isn’t the case, that we’re all mature enough to compartmentalize everything. But at what sacrifice? I’d never want Connor to feel he has to choose between them and me, but the truth of the matter is, he may have to. Until then, I’ll live in ignorant bliss.

“Lis, do you know where the iron is?”

After pushing start on the microwave, I turn to face my mom. She’s dressed in her “travel clothes,” which is a nice way of saying she’s in a velour sweat suit she’s owned since I was in high school. She only pulls it out when she and my dad are going on a long drive. I’m grateful for that.

“I think it’s in the cabinet above the washer,” I reply, turning my attention back to the microwave as my popcorn popping begins to slow.

“Found it,” she shouts from the laundry room. “I never think to look where something belongs. I’m so used to your father leaving things in random places. What’s on your agenda tonight?”

Pulling my dinner from the oven, I shake the bag in the air. “Popcorn and a movie.”

Frowning, she sighs. Normally on a night like tonight, when I’m all alone, I’d pull on my cowboy boots and head to Doris’s for dancing. That was before working full-time, baseball practice twice a week, and meeting Connor. Now, the idea of putting on makeup and real clothes on a Friday night sounds like too much effort.

“Are you all packed?”

“I just needed the iron.”

“Mom, you know the hotel will have an iron, right?”

Pursing her lips, she gives me a look I know far too well. It’s the one that says, “I’m not an idiot, daughter.”

“The hotel irons are like the hotel blow dryers. Sometimes they work great and other times you’re walking around with wrinkled clothes and half dry hair.”

Before I can respond, the doorbell rings and the tell-tale sounds of Jacob running at full speed toward the door echo through the house. Abandoning my popcorn before I’m able to add the extra butter and cheese, I join him in the entry way.

“Jacob, did you check before opening the door?” I ask before mouthing a hello to Janet.

“Yep. We gotta go, Mom,” my independent boy says as he takes a step toward the door. Before he makes it to the threshold, I tug on his collar.

“Not so fast, buster. Did you remember your cleats? I don’t want a call in the morning when you realize you don’t have them for pictures.”

“Pop put them in a separate bag and that bag in my bag. It’s a lot of bags but I have them all. Can I go now?”

It’s in this moment I realize we really do become our parents. As I stand here, looking down at my little boy, my lips pursed just like my mom’s. Bending down to eye level, I turn my cheek and make him give me a kiss.

“We’ll see you at the field tomorrow. Have a good night,” Janet says as she follows the boys down the steps.

Closing the door, I catch Clem’s eye as she carries her bag from her room. This is a big night for her. A sleepover with a couple of girls from her new class. I didn’t tell her, but I called the host mom yesterday and confirmed she was aware of the issues Clem has had to deal with and that these girls were not part of the old crowd. She was horrified that such behaviors happen at this age. The truth is, it’s a harsh reality all parents need to be aware of.

“Are you all set, honey?”

Clem has a flare for the dramatics but right now I see nothing but trepidation on her face. Walking to her, I pull her to me in a tight hug and kiss the top of her head. When she tries to pull away, I don’t let go. She begins to fuss but eventually that turns to giggles. The exact reaction I was hoping for.

“It’s going to be fun, don’t be nervous. You’ve spent time with Bella at her house before.”

Nodding her head, she moves toward the couch and sits down at the same time my parents walk out of their room. I love my family. My children are by far the most important people in my life and my parents a very close second. Okay, it may be a tie. But I am counting down the minutes until they are all gone. It’s just going to be me and a couple of romantic comedies and a bowl of popcorn. Maybe a glass or two of wine.

“Okay, kiddo we’re outta here. No wild parties,” Dad teases before stepping toward Clem and whispering something in her ear that puts a smile on her face.

“Don’t listen to him.” Stepping up next to me she whisper shouts, “You should have a friend over. No sense in being home all alone.”

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