Page 80 of Lethal Infatuation

"Fuck you, Ares," I said bitterly. "If you love your brother as much as you claim you do, you'll get rid of that thought."

He tossed his head back, laughing loudly. "Yet you still have the audacity to tell me you don't have a girl. All I'm saying is, just try to be on your best behaviour. There are better ways to solve your issues other than making use of violence."

"You know, I haven't been violent since we joined the FBI." That was clearly a lie. "Also, you sound exactly like her." I laughed softly, the memory bringing a smile to my face.

Ares smiled. "Whipped." He laughed. "I know your restraint is hanging by a thread, and setting someone's car on fire counts as an act of violence," he stated matter of factly.

"Okay, buddy, seeing that we're having a genuine heart to heart, are you ready to admit that you have feelings for Amala?" If he was going to press me, then I'd have to do the same. Hitting him below the belt where it hurt the most.

"Please, hell will freeze over before that happens," he grimaced. "The only feelings I have for her is fucking hatred, she's insufferable." He crossed his arms.

"Really?" I couldn't help but chuckle. "That explains why you're always looking at her when you think nobody's watching. I also know you better than you know yourself, Valiente."

"I don't know how this conversation suddenly drifted in my direction, but I still stick by my statement. Don't do anything reckless, Calisto. Besides, if you kill a man because of jealousy, I'll have to clean up that mess."

"You don't have to do a damn thing, I can take care of myself," I scoffed.

"Shut the fuck up," he said calmly. "When you were in a coma and on the verge of death, I was the one who came to check up on you every day, so don't give me that bullshit."

I sighed loudly, not wanting to be reminded of those dreadful memories. "Do we have to discuss this right now?"

"Yes," he said sternly. "I don't think you understand how it felt for me to watch my partner bleed out on the fucking floor. The doctors thought you weren't going to make it. That damn bullet to the chest just missed your heart."

The memory was still fresh and I shuddered at the thought, blinking slowly.

"Nicolas." I heard Ares' voice in the distance, but I could still feel his touch on my chest and arm. If he sounded far away from me, then how was it possible that I still felt his hand? "Stay with me, man, fuck!"

I was losing consciousness and I could feel my body becoming colder. My limbs felt numb and my eyes were so heavy that I couldn't keep them open anymore.

"Nicolas." Why did he sound so far away? Why was it so cold? "Don't close your eyes." There was some shuffling, a static sound and then I heard his voice again. "Braun, we've got a man down. It's Nicolas. He's been shot and he's losing a lot of blood."

Sirens blared in the background, but I couldn't stay awake any longer. "Ares." I tried talking, but my voice was hoarse.

"I'm here."

"I feel tired." My fingers twitched and that's when I finally closed my eyes.

"Nicolas." Everything went black, everything went silent apart from Ares' voice that was slowly beginning to fade. "Nicolas, wake up. Please. For fuck’s sake where's the medic?"

"You okay?" His voice brought me back to reality and I flicked my eyes back to his face that was etched with concern. "You zoned out for a minute."

"It's those flashbacks again," I sighed, placing both hands on my head in frustration. "They've been plaguing me day and night. I'mso fucking sick of it. The only time my mind experiences an ounce of peace is when I'm with her."

Ares didn't say anything for a few minutes, but he nodded his head in acknowledgment. "What about your anxiety?" he questioned. "Has therapy been helping with that?"

"I suppose it does," I answered truthfully. "I'm just a complete dick towards Natasha because she forces me to relive those fucking moments."

"How else will you overcome it?"

"I don't know," I said. "Not only did I just barely escape death, but I also failed. I couldn't complete the task assigned to me." I pinched the bridge of my nose. "I wasthis closeto arresting Antonio.This fucking close."

"Calisto," he said sternly. "You didn't fail. You did your job as best you could. We didn't know he was armed, we weren't prepared for that."

"I appreciate you," I said gruffly. We weren't the kind of men who spoke about our emotions. "You know that."

"I know you do," he answered. "You're one of the best agents I've ever worked with. I don't mean that from a biased perspective, just in case your train of thought goes in that direction."

"You know me so well." I laughed.