Page 72 of Drift

Go back nearly three years, to the threats of prison thrown his way in here off Gray, it had scared him to the core, got him running in so many other bad ways. But now, with the threat of someone outside, possibly making it inside, to Simon? Family?

Light held out a hand, palm flat, and he frowned at how it didn’t shake. It wasn’t that he was passed fear. He felt that enough each time he travelled abroad with Simon. This was just… different.

A chair eased out quietly by him, and a moment later, Gray sat down, his look on Light’s hand.

A moment later, Gray held his out level to Light’s, his run of eye over how neither shook, it seemed.

“Whoever it is, they’re not a threat,” Gray said eventually, his voice as soft as the night as he withdrew his touch. He gave a rough sigh a moment later. “Cattle out of the play pen tonight, nothing more.”

“You can’t know that for sure.” Light looked at him.

Gray tilted his head, then traced a finger over the back of Light’s hand. “You’re starting to.” He eased back and gave a sniff as Light dropped his arm across his knee.

Gray wore suit trousers and a shirt, but he kept his feet bare too. No tiredness infected his eyes, and he seemed more alive in the darkness, more… threatening, the feel entirely different with having him closeinthat dark. It bled from him in all directions, drowning Light, making him want to fight one moment, but back off before he’d started because the air was too ill, and Gray would walk away where Light wouldn’t. Lightfeltthat.

“Sometimes moments like these are the only place we really feel something,” Gray added quietly. “This build to the kill switch moment. It’s why we keep coming back to it. That intense… vibration. Whether it’s fear… hate… passion… obsession over getting our hands on something… what drives us personally to take a life—” He looked Light’s way. “—or to protect someone you care for… you go back into it to feel it,because you can’t reach it anywhere else. So when you can’t feel it around you like now, you know who’s getting close aren’t the kind to make you… feel. They’re not on our spectrum.”

That hit a hard note, but Light snorted. “That spectrum lied to us both about Cath.” He stayed on Gray. “She got close,” he reminded him again.

“We got close,” Gray said gently. “The thing with our spectrum is that we all share it as killers.” He gave a soft smile as he briefly looked away. “More so with father and son. We’re always going to screw each other’s signals up because of it, like we are with being close now.” He shrugged. “It shows we weren’t born perfect, Light. In fact, we’re more flawed than most. We know we live outside of the pen. That the pen exists. Those inside don’t, but they do get to feel those on the outside sometimes.” Gray held up his hand. “They catch on to our vibrations. So when it comes to you, to this?” He tapped the back of Light’s hand. “You know if you feel nothing, there’s no threat, not if these kind of sappers get through. Ninety-eight percent of them won’t ever pose a threat.”

Light cocked a brow. “Onlyninety-eight percent?”

Gray smiled. “Always leave one percent for the accidentals: those who take you out of the field of play before you get there because of the trainwreck they leave behind for you to trip over.”

Light choked a smile. “And the other one percent?”

Gray’s return smile was soft. “They’re the few who find there’s a pen that comes with a door, and they deliberately stop you from getting into the field of play to calm you down.”

“Ah….” Light blushed, just a little. “You’re not worried about Jack and Jan tonight?” He avoided talk on… Simon himself.

Gray shook his head. “Not now. They’re safe and sleeping,” he said quietly. “They stay that way. George is on watch east side with a security team. No one in. No one out.”

“Always the one percent who screw with your head, huh?”

Gray smiled over. “Wouldn’t have it any other fucking way.”

Yeah, Light saw that, understood it. Yet here he was himself, sitting alone.

“Always the one percent who screw with your head, huh?” Gray said gently.

Light looked his way, and Gray’s look rested on his milk back over on the unit.

“Been noticing a few things lying around of a morning in here. You’ve been playing avoidance for a while.” Gray snorted. “Good to know it wasn’t Jack after all, but—”

“Ask his permission to be in his kitchen, right? Grow some balls?”

Gray watched him for a moment, then shook his head. “He’s not in good head space to talk to yet. Keep your distance, okay.”

It wasn’t even an ask, just a polite request that needed to be followed.

“You weren’t expecting cattle tonight. This is culler business.” Light returned the polite… seriousness, wanting the intel given.

A nod came his way, but Gray offered nothing more.

“Simon’s here,” Light added flatly. “I should have been briefed.”

Gray shook his head and folded his arms. “My streets,” he said softly. “By your own rule, you want nothing to do with howI walk them. Don’t start breaking it now. Keep your head where you need it to be.”

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