Page 73 of Corrupt Game

Yeesh, I sounded like it was just a business transaction. And it was. Or was supposed to be. It always had been. I had enjoyed each of the women I’d been with. I was proud to show themoff and have them in the office to look at, but there had been something missing that I hadn’t even realized until she’d run into my chest.

Collette had changed things in such a short time that I’d been with her, and it hadn’t even been more than a few weeks.

She was making me fall in love with her, and it was something I couldn’t afford to do.

Fuck, what did I know about love? I was too messed up to be loved or to give love. It was one of the few things that my father had been right about. He was always right when I didn’t want him to be.

How could I expect to have a normal relationship when it could mean that I would do exactly as my father had done?

There were other ways to get what I needed without all of the cloak and dagger stuff.

I smiled as I thought of her attempts to get back at me the past few days with the sexy swaying of her hips or shoving her ass in my face time and time again.

Oh, that ass. I wanted to grab and squeeze it. Or better yet, give it a good firm slap that would make her squeak.

The things I was doing were getting to her as well, but in a good way. Her body was fraught with sexual tension. She was ready for me to have her. If only she would tell me so. I couldn’t act on anything until she gave me permission.

Maybe we were two different sides of the same coin. Both in need of someone that understood what it was like to be on the outside looking in on the normals of the world.

There wasn’t going to be some sort of happy ever after in my world. I’d settle for a few moments of happiness that could be shared with someone like Collette.

When I’d seen the way that my father had treated my mother, I had assumed that it was how love worked. Then as I grew older I knew that love wasn’t hurting someone, but by then it was too late. Some habits were ingrained so deeply that it would take a jackhammer to pry them loose.

I had wanted to try for a chance at love, but nothing had managed to thaw out my cold heart. It was why I’d dated one of the socialites that were on my father’s list of approved women.

We’d gone out for several months, but I’d never even tried to sleep with her. I hadn’t had the urge to do so. I cared about her, she was nice. It wasn’t fair to her to continue leading her on, so I’d let her go.

Rumors had started to pop up about us, they linked our names together. It meant that she was expecting me to ask her to get married. That wasn’t something I ever planned to do.

She’d want kids and then another and another. I couldn’t have kids. I wouldn’t have made a good father. There was no way I was going to mess up future kids’ lives by having me as their sperm donor. The past was proof that the family line should die with me. No one should have to carry around that type of baggage.

After that, I only dated, I hated the tears she’d cried when I’d broken it off with her. That was when I vowed that I would never get married or date someone for more than a month in a social setting. There was no way they could get the wrong idea in that short of time.

At one point, I’d gone to a few clubs that catered to my type of proclivities, but just didn’t like anyone trying to oversee what I did. Everyone at the clubs felt they should know everything that I was doing or who I was doing. It was too public for my tastes.

I’d been telling myself fantasies for so long that I was overlooking the real thing when it was in front of me. She was more than I had bargained for.

The real thing was so much better, but there were only so many times when I had wanted to break my own rules.

Just that morning when I’d ordered her not to get dressed, she had pranced out of the bathroom still dripping from the shower. I had almost shot my load right then.

She had no idea what she was doing to me. Paperwork, working in the lab, doing research on new prototypes all were beginning to take a back seat when she was around.

After she was asleep, I would just watch the monitor as if she would leave me. Not that she could, but I didn’t want her to. I mean, I gave them a choice, but that was more of a formality.

Unsure of what to do about her or the way she made me react, I’d changed things up. It was why I’d started having us go to the condo on weekends. I wanted to be able to get to know her in a less stressful environment while still maintaining some of my control over the situation.

None of the others had even been given the opportunity to come to my condo. This was the first time that I’d broken my carefully created rules.

She’d wormed her way into my heart.

“Damn it.” I threw the glass against the wall in anger. I was losing my touch.

Fantasies continued to run through my mind. All the things I’d done over the years that others had found intriguing, I wanted to try on Collette.

Her innocent naivety was worth watching at things I’d done over and over again.

With her, it was like getting my virginity back and being willing to lose it only to her.

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