Page 91 of Best Kept Secret

"Did you mean it when you said I could see her on weekends?"

Beau gazed into my eyes. "Move innow,and make me the happiest man in the world, darlin'. But I understand that you lost the years most people have to build their lives—so, I appreciate your need to live alone. You're also eleven years younger than me. I've been there, done that, burned the fuckin' T-shirt. You have every right to explore life."

"What does that mean?" Did he want me to date other men? Is that what he was saying?

"It means, you can and should live on your own, do your own thing," he replied tentatively.

"Date other—"

"Don't even think about it, darlin'. You're mine and I'm yours. Full fuckin' stop." He squeezed my arm tightly, possessively. "All I'm sayin' is that you can take all the time you want. I'm just hopin' that you'll come home to us soon. And if you want to start with just weekends, I'm on my knees, thanking the fuckin' universe."

I smiled. "You have such a way with words, Beau Bodine."

He kept looking at me. "Does that mean you'll stay with us on weekends?"

I swallowed. "I'll…be there…I don't know about…you know."

"Sleeping there?" he inquired cheekily.

I let out a deep breath. "I want you, too," I admitted. "It's not that I don't and—"

He yanked me into his arms, pulling me into his lap. He sealed my mouth with his. It was a hard kiss, one that lingered as he kept nibbling my lips while keeping an eye on Pari. He was learning all the important parenting skills, I thought, amused. Kissing a womanandwatching his kid chase a butterfly.

"What was that for?" I asked when he released my lips but not me. I was still on his lap, comfortable, comforted.

"You can't say shit like you want me and not expect me to takesomething. I've been wanting to kiss you forever."

I kissed his jaw tenderly. "Are we dating, Beau?"

"Yeah, darlin', I think we are. We didn't do this right last time. We jumped into parenting, and then a bed. Now, we have the time to get to know one another, build a foundation that's more than just Pari, though she makes us a hundred times stronger."

I snuggled into him. "Are you going to, as they say in the South, court me?" I teased.

He chuckled. "Oh, darlin', I'm going to court the panties off of you."

I laughed. "Like I said, Beau, you have a way with words." I paused for a long minute and then added, "But before we can do that, I need to do something."

"Anything."

I swallowed hard. "I…." I shuddered at what I knew I had to reveal.

"Tell me," he insisted.

I moved away from him and faced him.

"I...the trash bag," my voice wobbled, and he nodded, his eyes shadowed. "I haven't thrown it out."

"Oh, fuck, Mira. I..." His voice cracked as he stared down at the floor. When he looked back at me, there were tears glistening in his eyes, and the sight of them stunned me. "That was...so fucking callous of me. Cruel. I don't even know how to apologize for something like that."

"Why did you do it?" I asked, my voice quieter now, almost afraid of the answer.

Before he could respond, Pari came toddling, her tiny feet padding against the grass. Beau softened immediately, scooping her up and sitting her on his lap. It was like watching someone slip into a second skin—gentle, warm, yet so full of regret.

"Because," he began, his voice steadying as he looked at me over Pari's shoulder, "I was reacting. Fighting. Wanting to hurt you the way I was hurting. It doesn't make it right. It doesn'tmake it forgivable. But that's what I was doing." A single tear slid down his cheek and then another. He didn't try to wipe them away.

Pari's little hand darted up, her small fingers brushing his face as she wiped at the tears. "Bodaddy, are you sad?" she asked, her head tilting as she peered into his face.

"Yes, Baby Girl," he said softly. "I am."

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