Page 18 of Bone Echo

She smiled, gave him a squeeze back. “I’m glad I could help. I want to help.”

Her sweet words made him realize something else he wanted to say right now. No more putting off what he wanted the people he cared about to know. “I made a lot of mistakes with Liz. I didn’t listen the way I should have. I wasn’t fully present. I don’t want to ever make that mistake again.” He stared at his untouched tea. “I’m worried sick I’ve already screwed up with Ella.”

“I don’t think so.” Audra shook her head adamantly. “Ella is a beautiful, well-adjusted girl who adores her father.”

“God, I hope you’re right. I love her more than life.”

“Trust me.” Audra sipped her tea. “Tell me about Liz and your life together. You haven’t spoken of her very often.”

This too made him sad. Liz was a wonderful woman and should be remembered. But damn it wasn’t easy. “For a longtime it was difficult to even think about her much less talk about her.”

“I can imagine. When my ex and I divorced. I didn’t want to think about him either. Certainly didn’t want to talk about him. For entirely different reasons obviously. We had no children and he was a total jerk as it turned out. But that’s the way life works out sometimes.” She shook her head. “The heart wants what it wants often without conferring with the brain first.”

“True.” Kurt summoned a smile, knowing she needed it. “Liz and I met in college. We rushed into everything we did together. Marriage. Having a kid. But I wouldn’t change a thing—well, except my failure to be there for the two of them. I should have listened more. Been present more. But I felt it was my responsibility to keep us afloat financially and I took it to the extreme. Spent a lot of my sparse off time drinking away the nightmares from work.” What he would give if he could do over just one minute of that lost time.

“I’m certain you were a good husband and you’re still a good father.” She squeezed his hand again. “I keep a pretty close eye on you after all.”

He appreciated the thought, but the facts spoke for themselves.

“There’s a lot I could have done better.” Memories he usually suppressed surfaced now, haunting him. “When Ella was ten she started having some issues at school. It was like she was so far advanced beyond the other kids that she didn’t fit in. There was always something. She was frustrated and in pain emotionally. Liz felt she needed a more advanced situation so she found a private school, the Learning Institute, which we couldn’t afford. Thankfully there were scholarships. Ella did great, but then Liz got upset about the direction Ella’s personalized curriculum was taking. She tried to talk to me about it but I didn’t have the time or the patience.”

He shook his head. “Sometimes I was just a jerk about it. I told her it was what she wanted and now she was the one unhappy. Ella seemed to be doing fine. The problem was, I probably didn’t know the whole story. Liz didn’t tell me or maybe I didn’t listen. The next thing I knew she was dead. I will always wonder if it was my fault. If it was some sort of retaliation.”

“Her murder?” Audra asked.

He winced. “I took down some seriously bad guys. The MO of hers was very similar to some of my cases. But the connection never went beyond that. Ella was having problems at school again and I decided to just get the hell away from all of it. A detective who was my mentor had retired and he’d once lived in Camden so he urged me to come here. He knew the former chief of police and was aware he was on the verge of retirement. So here I am.”

“And I, for one, am very glad you are.” Audra’s smile was sincere but brief. “What sort of problems was Ella having? Was it about her mother’s death? That’s a difficult tragedy to overcome. Adjustment is more often than not a long journey.”

“I’m assuming so. She was ditching school. Sneaking back home. That sort of thing. I just felt a change of venue was necessary.”

“She’s done beautifully here,” Audra assured him. “There have been no problems.”

“Until now.” Kurt frowned. “If we can’t find?—”

“No.” Audra stood. “You will find her. Now, come on. I’m taking you up to bed where you will get some sleep. Ella is counting on you. So is Brian.”

Kurt checked his phone. Wished for news. But she was right. He had to get some sleep. He had to be on top of his game in the morning. Ella needed him on his toes.

Audra was waiting in his bed after he showered. She kissed him without suggestion of more. She held him and whispered sweet assurances until he fell asleep.

If only her voice had followed him into his dreams. Instead all he heard was Ella’s cries…

CHAPTER TEN

Wednesday, December 18, 6:00 a.m.

Even at six in the morning Doreen beat Kurt to the office. The woman was dedicated for sure and Kurt had never appreciated it more than he did just now.

She’d followed him into his office and given him a rundown on the tips that had come in—none that panned out other than the one from the Village Stop. Nothing relevant in on the Amber Alert. She’d also given him the schedule and search areas of official personnel as well as civilians. The idea of how much help continued to pour in had his eyes stinging.

“Thanks, Doreen. I’m sure some of those folks need more sleep but I’m grateful they’re hanging in there.”

He had slept about four hours, then he’d been up doing all he could online and taking a final look around the house and in the garage Ella used to ensure he hadn’t missed anything. No such luck.

“None of them wanted to take even a minute off,” Doreen let him know. “But I saw that they all got breaks. We’ve been rotating teams.”

“I appreciate your hard work.”