Page 11 of For Three Seconds

“Scarlett, are you okay?” Gigi was waving her hands furiously in front of me.

Before I could answer,hewalked in. A whole summer without seeing him, and it didn’t matter. I felt like I got punched in the stomach. Gigi and Dylan were scrutinizing me, watching my every move, and after the way I’d lost it last year, I couldn’t exactly blame them.

“I’m good,” I lied, but neither one of them called me out on it.

We were all standing there when I felt him get closer. I could lie and say I wasn’t anxious even though I was—a whole summer without seeing him was a long time. I knew he wasn’t mine, but that didn’t mean I didn’t watch him. I tried hard not to, but my eyes had a mind of their own when it came to him. Sometimes it felt like looking at him was the fix I needed to get me through the day. Looking was safe because he was Gigi’s.

He would always be Gigi’s, even if it got to the point that he wasn’t.

Girl code 101: thou shalt not date thy bestie’s exes.

The floor parted for him like the Red Sea did for Moses, and instead of staying and witnessing Mr. Football God, I turned my heel and left before he could reach us.

Gavin Dunn wasn’t mine to want. He wasn’t mine to kiss, and those three seconds of bliss weren’t mine to take.

One more year in his presence, and then I never had to see him again.

If that was the case, why did the thought of never seeing him again fill me with anxiety and dread instead of relief?

Four

“How humiliating—ifI were her, I would have rather be homeschooled.”

“Her brother had to take her to the looney bin.”

“Poor Nick. This must be so hard on him.”

Those were just some of the things I heard whispered about me. Of course, no one dared say anything to my face whenever I came to the room. The whispering would stop. I just wished they would also stop staring; it made me feel like a caged animal. It made me wish I still had their pity.

Kind of.

Not really.

Mr. Reeves’s class was up on the third floor, last room right next to the west stairwell and directly across from the boys’ bathroom. At least it wasn’t the bathroom on the first floor; that one always smelled like weed.

When I walked into the room, I wished that economics didn’t have to be a seniors-only class. It was already hard enough trying to catch up, and it was easier when students didn’t know about me.

Colleges wouldn’t care about my personal shit, would they? I probably should go and have a chat with my counselor. Mrs. Wells was a lovely lady. I knew I should be grateful for everything she’d done for me. Thanks to her, the possibility of a good college was still on the table.

As soon as I walked into class, the teacher told us we were sitting in alphabetical order. For once, I didn’t mind. Not like I had many friends left.

Not any real ones.

My seat was the second to last in the first row, which I didn’t mind, as it was next to a wall. I just hoped the person behind me wasn’t annoying. Maybe they wouldn’t talk to me? That would be nice.

Looking at the clock, I noticed I still had three minutes before the bell rang. Jeez, what was wrong with me? I got to class like a minute after my last class. What happened to the days where I would go and chill by my locker? That didn’t appeal to me anymore.

When I noticed the people who entered staring at me, I put my head down. That way I made it hard for them to keep looking at me.

When the bell rang, I raised my head and did a quick scan of the room. Everyone was a senior—no surprise there. A bunch of people I didn’t talk to, who apparently knew about me, stared.

When I met their gazes, unflinching, they turned away. Seriously, who the heck did they think they were? Just because they’d heard about me didn’t mean they knew me.

I hated nosey people.

My eyes landed on Becca, cheer captain, the girl Gigi wanted to top but never seemed to get at her level. For which I was glad. Maybe I just hated Becca because she called me fat and wouldn’t let me join the squad.

Nah, she was just a bitch.