Page 26 of Wild Dreams

"The things we survive aren't always obvious. I saw how your parents' absence hurt you and how much you enjoyed being at our house."

"Your parents saved me. I don't know what I would have done without them." I would have been alone even more. Scarlett's friendship meant a lot to me.

"I'm glad my family could be there for you."

I stood up and gathered our trash. "On that note, we should keep going."

Chance nodded. "This snack is only going to get me so far. I'll need to eat lunch soon."

"Isn't that your tradition, a big steak dinner after outings?" I asked as we got on our bikes and pushed off at a more leisurely pace this time.

"We work hard. Play harder. Plus it gives us a chance to talk and reconnect. I assume that part is more for the brothers. But I've always felt like a part of their family."

"You're like one of the brothers."

"They treat their cousin Walker like a brother too. Ever since his parents died, they took him in."

Why hadn't my parents done the same? It was the same pain that resurfaced over and over again. I wasn't good enough. Instead of dwelling on those feelings, I pedaled harder, pulling away from Chance.

He said he understood what my life was like and what I went through, but I wasn't so sure he did. How could he when his life was so different? Not only did he have his family, but he'd been adopted into the Wildes' too. His life was full. That was the reason he didn't feel the need to meet someone and fall in love. He already had everything he needed.

I was the one who was deficient, always looking for something to fulfill me. How many times had I told myself that happiness comes from within? I didn't need other people's love to feel complete. It was a hard concept to let go of though.

We cycled the rest of the way in silence with me pedaling in the front. The path was busier now, so we had to maneuver carefully around families with kids and those who were walking or jogging.

By the time we got to the end, I was sweating and dying for a drink. I pulled off to the side and grabbed the water bottle. Idrank my fill, then squirted some on my face. The combination of the liquid and the cool air chilled my body.

When I wiped the drops from my eyes, Chance was looking at me with a strange expression on his face. He probably felt bad for me. And as a police officer, he was trained to help others. If he sensed I was a damsel in distress, his instincts would kick in. I didn't want that.

Chance cleared his throat. "You have plans after this?"

"I'm grabbing a drink with Scarlett.”

"It seems like that at times." When we reached the tailgate, Chance put our bikes inside.

Chance held the passenger side door open for me. "You ready to head back?"

I climbed inside. "I'm sure you have a busy day today."

"I'll probably check in with work." Chance inclined his head before he shut the door, closing me inside the cab.

I watched people biking and walking on the paths. Was it a bad idea to spend more time with Chance? It was only making me long for what I couldn't have. I needed to refocus on finding someone new to date. Someone who didn't know my back story, wouldn't feel sorry for me, or assume I was boring because I was the town librarian and enjoyed reading.

At least I'd gotten out today and done something. Usually, I spent Saturdays, cleaning my house and making dinner plans for the week.

"Did Oakley get adopted?" Chance asked.

"The application for him didn't pan out. He's cute and everyone wants him, but it doesn't mean they're ready to be a dog owner."

"You'd be a good one."

"I've been wondering if I could hire someone to take him out during the day."

"I know a teenager down the street from you. He's looking to earn some money."

I rested my head back on the seat. "Is this one of the kids who's gotten into trouble before?" I remembered his dad tried to help the kids who had run-ins with the law. He thought if he could show them that he cared, that they'd choose a different path.

"You know me well. He was hanging out with some friends who were trespassing. He hasn't gotten into any trouble since. I set his family up with services from the county."