Page 3 of Cruel Promise

When we left him, we had nothing. Both my mom and I had to learn a lot of things without him around.

“I’ll be judge of that.” I grab a spoon, dip it into the stew, and take a small bite.

And almost spit it back out. “Nope. You’re right. It’s horrible.”

She laughs and turns the burner off. “We can order takeout.”

“Can we afford that?” I received some scholarship money to go to Yale, but I’m also using student loans and can’t afford much else.

She pauses, the smile on her face dimming. “Well, maybe we can buy a frozen dinner.”

“Ok. That sounds good.” I grab her hand before she can walk away. “Mom, you’re doing your best.”

“I’ve been trying for the past couple of years, and I never seem to get better. I always seem to forget we don’t live that same lifestyle anymore.”

“Just because we don’t have money doesn’t mean our lifestyle is bad. I think it’s a lot better now.”

Now that my father isn’t constantly abusing her. Now that he’s not screaming at me.

He had money, but it wasn’t worth it to live in that house. There are more important things in life than money when your constant state of mind is at risk.

Mom squeezes my hand and lets go. “You’re sweet.”

“You raised me right.”

“Come on. Let’s head to the grocery store and grab some frozen dinners.”

Standing in the checkout line, I get a text from Jason asking if we can meet up. I text him, asking him what for, and he replies that he just wants to see me.

“I don’t understand,” I murmur.

Mom takes one look at the text and laughs. “Honey, he has a crush on you. I’ve been telling you that for a while.”

“No he doesn’t. Jason and I are friends.”

She tucks a piece of my hair behind my hair. “You can be so innocent sometimes. Never change.”

“Mom, Jason and I are friends.”

“Then why does he always ask you out for coffee?”

“Because we’re friends!” I grab a chocolate bar from the stand by the cashier and notice it’s five dollars. I put it back. Every cent counts right now.

“You know, you never date. I get why you didn’t when we lived with your father. He wouldn’t let you. But you’re an adult now, Ava. We’re free of him. You can date. Have some fun.”

“I don’t want to date Jason because we’re friends. I don’t see him that way.”

She nudges my arm. “So, is there someone you see that way?”

I shake my head. The truth is my father scared me out of dating. He would scream at me, tell me I was a whore, for even looking at a man on the television. It made the concept of being with a man terrifying.

And even now that I’m free of him, I still can’t forget his words. I once read this article that said we tend to date people like our parents, and that instantly made me not want to be with any man. Not if there was a chance he was anything like my father.

For right now, I want to focus on school and just being free with my mom.

“I just don’t want you to be alone forever,” Mom says.

“I’m nineteen, Mom. I have time.”

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