Page 144 of Cruel Promise

“But I’ll stay for now,” I say.

I expect him to pull his hand away. It’s what the Nikolai I know would do.

But this Nikolai only holds my hand tighter.

Neither of us lets go.

Nikolai is discharged from the hospital after a week. During that time, I’ve been busy planning Claude’s funeral.

“You don’t have to do it all yourself,” Mrs. Brown said to me, but I told her I had to do it.

“I need to pay him back somehow, you know?”

Because of the funeral planning, I had to break my promise to Nik to stay by his bedside. He told me he understood, and I think a part of him was relieved I wasn’t staying by his bed twenty-four seven. He doesn’t want to seem weak in front of me.

He’s better. He has to walk with a cane for his leg, but he can move, and the doctors told him he’ll fully recover with physical therapy within just a few months.

I pick him up from the hospital the day he’s let go.

“You didn’t have to do this,” he says, easing into the car.

“I know. But I’m still your wife.”

“You feel obligated, huh?”

“Maybe a little.”

He smiles slightly, easing the tension between us.

I drive him back to the mansion.

“You’re not coming?” he asks after he gets out of the car.

“More funeral planning. Mom and I have lunch plans. But …”

“You don’t need to explain yourself, Ava. I understand. Trust me. I understand.” And then he limps into his house.

A flash of guilt hits me. But why am I the guilty one? Nikolai is the one who forced me into marriage. He’s the one who lied about my mom being alive. I have no reason to feel guilty.

But I know why I do.

It’s because I’m giving up on this marriage.

I begged for Nikolai to let me in, and now, I’m the one pushing him out.

I don’t follow him inside. I just drive away, knowing I need to figure out what I’m going to do with Nikolai. It’s not fair to keep him waiting and wondering.

My mom has been subtly pressuring me to stay with her full-time. It would be so easy to fall back into an old routine with her. I’d be happy. I know I’d be happy.

But would there be something missing in my life? Can I truly forget about Nik?

And do I even want to?

He has a claim on my heart, but he doesn’t even know I love him. That’s what makes me feel most guilty of all.

Chapter

Twenty

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