Page 104 of Consume Me

Scooting myself into a sitting position, I drag my knees to my chin.

If I gave him the chance, he would take me, and I wouldn’t care about anything other than the all-consuming pleasure of our bodies joining. I am sore in the most delicious ways, yet I still crave more.

“I don’t want to pressure you. It’s just that I would love it if you were comfortable telling me why that is. I am sure it’s not me who steals your sleep.”

“Oh, you definitely are.” But his smile fades from his gorgeous face, and a frown appears between his brows.

Silence falls, thick and heavy.

I place my hand on his, and he interlaces our fingers. Giving it a light squeeze, I signal that I am here for him. I would open my chest to let him see that my heart beats for him, show him how much I love him, and that nothing he would say could change that.

“My father experimented on me.”

My body freezes, but I force myself to take measured breaths.

“I told you, I am not normal.” He sighs.

“Normal is a concept society came up with for the majority to have a guideline.”

“Nothing scares you away from me, does it?”

“No. Nothing, Blake. I promise.”

He looks ahead, lost in his thoughts.

“I will tell you and if that changes––”

I shut him up by pressing my mouth to his. “Nothing will change. Give me the chance to prove it to you.”

So many emotions battle in his eyes before resignation takes over his features.

“After Kaden was initiated and Celine was sent away, that changed our perspective about the Family. We have been in chains since our birth, knowing the initiation was inevitable. It loomed over us, but I thought we would pledge our damn loyalty to the Family, and that would be the end of it. But there was torture—both physical and mental. I would party and fuck just to try to forget.”

I wince, and he says, “I know my words will mean shit, but if I had the slightest hope that I’d meet you, I would have waited.”

“You had to cope.”

“I’ll never deserve you, and that fucks with my head even more.”

“I accept you just how you are,” I say wholeheartedly.

“But then Abigail’s initiation happened, and it was no longer about being chess pieces on their board of power. They took away what we wanted most for ourselves. They called it weakness, and weaknesses in the Family had to be obliterated. When Abi returned from the rehab center for her eating disorder and told us how far they went, it was on me to protect my friends. To do that, I had to earn their trust. But I had to catchtheir attention first so I could show my father how repentant I was.”

I know the hard part is just starting because Blake has a faraway look on his face, radiating so much distress.

“I threw a party during my senior year. I got drunk on purpose, and the principal called my father that night. Caleb brought me home and shouted at me. I had to act like I was sorry. He made me admit that I was an irresponsible prick and to promise that I’d do anything to earn his trust back. He bought it.

“The next morning, Caleb brought me to the laboratory, where I had to say the same shit to Felix. Their plan was to make us compliant at whatever cost, even if that meant altering our brains.”

“Oh my god,” I say, cupping my mouth to hold in the sob, but it breaks free.

“Shh, don’t cry for me.”

I knew I couldn’t have fallen for an unfeeling bastard, but he is something else entirely.

“My initiation was basically my father enhancing everything about me. I can’t get drunk, drugs don’t affect my brain chemistry, and I don’t feel pain.”

That’s dangerous—just because he can’t feel it doesn’t mean his body can keep up if he goes too far.

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