Page 31 of Consume Me

“Unnecessary is whatever you’re doing.”

She takes a sip of her drink, glaring at me. “Dating. That’s what I am doing.”

“Searching for ‘the one’?”

She inches her face toward mine. Our lips are so close, almost touching. One slight dip of my head and I’d devour her—and ruin her for all others.

Her tongue pokes out, and she licks her lower lip, adding fuel to someone who’s already burning from within.

“Yes. And you can’t stop that.” Indignation colors her tone. “What is your problem, anyway?”

I snake my hand around the back of her neck and hold her close to me—close enough for her sweet scent to activate the madness in me. Close enough that I am entertaining things I shouldn’t.

“You want to date, then fucking date. Find someone who would go against me in the ring, and I will step away.”

She crosses her arms, mumbling. “Who would that be?”

Someone who will want you bad enough. Like I fucking do, because I’d take on the entire world for her. Yet, I can’t fight my demons.

Acceptance settles in my chest. I don’t know how, but when the day comes, I will shake the asshole’s hand and imagine the most fucked up what-if of my life: how it would have been if I were in his place. I already know, from the fist clenching around my lungs and making it hard to breathe, that losing her will fuck me up for good.

“You seem pretty motivated, so I am sure you can find someone.”

“Just for clarification. If I do find that guy, you’ll stop sabotaging my dates?”

“I will,” I say through a clenched jaw.

She offers her hand, and we shake on it. We both look at our hands clasped together. Hers perfectly molded to mine, her soft touch against my calloused one. My peace and war. My inferno and heaven.

She gestures for Xander, and he puts two shots in front of us. While she raises hers, I stare at the transparent liquid, which lost its potent numbing effects the night I threw a party in my senior year of high school. It got out of hand, but I lost it when Abi returned from her stint in rehab for her eating disorder and told us everything about her initiation. My father, being who he is, made sure I could never get drunk again. That’s not the only thing he experimented on me with.

“You’re not drinking anymore,” she whispers, as if not to scare me away. “Why?”

I move to leave when she grips my wrist. “Talk to me. Please. I just…”

That’s always been the problem. With her, I want to tell her everything. Be hers and let myself drown in all her softnessand goodness. But all I can offer her is my darkness and fucked up brain.

“Mia, that guy is not me.”

That seems to wake her up. She stands up and waves at Xander to pay the tab, but I take care of it instead. She mumbles, “I’m too tired to deal with you right now.”

On the way out, she hugs Tyson, and I stare him down while the asshole smirks, hugging her tighter. Once we’re outside, she starts walking toward the house. This girl is going to be the death of me.

“Mia.”

“I am old enough to take care of myself.”

“Get your ass in my car.”

She turns around, huffing. “I managed just fine while you were away.”

“Bitter?”

Mia storms in my direction, but I scoop her up and toss her over my shoulder.

She lets out a yelp. “Put me down. What has gotten into you?”

You, damn it. I can’t stay away.If something happened to her, I would go nuclear, reducing the world to nothing but atomic dust.

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