Page 25 of Wilde Abandon

She didn’t want anything from him.She just wanted to be with him.

Even for this trip back to the past, and the present that still sucked, but at least he wasn’t going to get a beating.Not today.Never again.

Because if his mother ever laid a hand on him again, he’d be out the door for good.And he knew she didn’t want that.Not now.Not when she needed him the most.

“Some days are good,” he explained.“Some are bad.She can be…cranky.”

“I’ve seen her be a royal bitch.She doesn’t scare me.I don’t care what she says, so long as she doesn’t hurt you.”

Fuck.This woman, she got to him so deep he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to take losing her again.“The one thing I can tell is that she’s trying to be on her best behavior when I’m here.We’re strangers who share a bloody past, and still don’t know how to talk to each other.”

“It must be really hard to want her to be the person you imagine she could be in your head if only she tried.Or cared to do it.It must be incredibly disappointing and frustrating that she won’t.You can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change.”

No one had ever come close to understanding his complicated feelings about his mother and what it was like to be her son.“How do you understand that so clearly?”

“She taught me that lesson, same as you.When you’re ready, you’ll see her for who and what she really is and you’ll know it’s time to cut this anchor dragging you down.”

I’m not there yet.

“She’s dying.I can’t turn my back on her.It’s just not who I want to be.”

She put her hand on his thigh.“You’re a good man.If nothing else, you’ll know in your head and heart that you did everything you could to make this relationship work.It’s not you.It’s most definitely her.”

He laughed.

She eyed him.“You aren’t the problem, Fox.She is.There is nothing wrong with you, and everything is wrong about her.She should have loved and protected you.She didn’t.She only cared about herself.”

“He beat her, too, sometimes.”

Her lips pressed tight and anger filled her eyes.“The answer to that is not joining in when he beat you.”

Those words hit him right in the chest.He hooked his hand at the back of her neck and pulled her into another of the amazing kisses they shared.“So fucking fierce.”

“She is the abuser.You are the survivor.You should be smug when you walk in that door because you are a million times better than she will ever be.You have a life she could only dream of having because she’s done nothing but wallow in self-pity and rail at the world that she deserved more and everyone should give it to her for no fucking reason at all.”

Maybe it made him a little off, but he loved seeing her riled up on his behalf.She cared.For him, that mattered more than anything.

So fucking tell her the truth.

Still, he kept his secret.“Let’s go.”The sooner they got through this, the better.Plus, Melody had to be at work soon.That gave him an excuse to leave earlier than Tanya would expect.

She always tried to get him to stay as long as possible.She always complained about him living in town and not at her place.He simply couldn’t stand to be in that house.The memories overtook him.Especially the more she tried to get him to do what she wanted with that tone that came into her voice sometimes.He remembered it well from the past.

Tanya and this place were best taken in small doses.

He met Melody at the front of his car and halted before going to the porch steps.“You didn’t say anything about the car.”

“It’s awesome.What’s not to like about a cherry-red Mustang Mach 1?”

He grinned.So easy to do with her.“Do you remember the car?”

She raised a brow.“Should I?”

“You gave me one for my seventh birthday in second grade.”

She turned and stared at the car.“Seriously?You bought a life-size one because I gave you aHot Wheels?”

He grinned.“Yes.”

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