Page 17 of Merrily You

“We are,” she said, squeezing my hand.

“Oh, can we get a picture of you kissing under the mistletoe? Please?” Of course, Mom would want that. Just as I predicted.

“Sure,” I said, tugging Danny with me right to the arch where the mistletoe hung.

“Okay, give me a second,” Mom said, messing with the settings on her phone. I went ahead and let her position us before turning to Danny.

I tried to reassure her with my eyes since I couldn’t say anything without my parents hearing.

She nodded back at me and then on my mom’s command, we kissed like we were supposed to.

This time it was different than in the car. Not as uncomfortable, that was for sure. It was only natural to sink into this kiss. Did it count as our third? I didn’t know. But this time it felt only natural for me to kiss her with no inhibitions and for one of my feet to lift from the floor and curl up behind me in the perfect pose.

To her credit, Danny kissed me back with as much enthusiasm, her mouth relentless against mine, pressing hard like she was trying to crawl inside me. I wasn’t opposed to that at all. She could do whatever she wanted with me as long as she didn’t stop kissing me. I’d grabbed onto her shirt to anchor myself and I knew I was wrinkling it, but I didn’t care. She had her arms around my waist, her fingers digging into my skin just on the right side of too hard.

It wasn’t until Danny pulled away that I heard the cheers of people around us. Oops.

My intention with the kiss had been subdued but convincing and we’d swung all the way to intense and borderline inappropriate. I had no excuse except that I couldn’t help myself. Every time Danny’s lips touched mine for longer than a second, I lost my damn mind. Forgot every plan and rule I’d made for myself.

Danny stared down at me, her breath coming in little gasps as if she’d just run down the stairs. Her brown eyes were wide in her face and she looked a little stunned. Probably the same way I looked.

“Sorry,” I said, not really sure what I was apologizing for. She’d kissed me back just as recklessly.

“I…” she trailed off. She closed her eyes. “I think we need to talk.”

She opened her eyes and my heart dropped into my stomach. This couldn’t be good.

“Okay, um, let’s go to my room.” I gave my parents what I hoped was a normal smile and winked at them before heading for the stairs. They’d hopefully think that we were going upstairs to fool around. Gross, but necessary. My parents had never been weird about sex, even when I’d come out. They’d made sure I had all the information I needed and had taken me to the doctor for birth control if I decided I wanted it. In some ways they’d been a little too progressive and had swung over into embarrassing, but it was better than the alternative.

Danny shut my bedroom door behind us, and I clenched my hands behind my back.

She was going to break this off. Right after we’d made out under the mistletoe and told my parents we were “dating.” Fuck.

“Just say it.”

Danny had been staring at my bed and turned around slowly. “Say what?”

“You’re going to say that we should break up. Or fake break up since we aren’t actually dating. Whatever.” I hated this. Why had I come up with this idea in the first place? She’d been right. It was a bad one.

“I don’t… Fuck, Holiday.” Danny shook her head and started pacing around the room. “I don’t know what to do with this.”

“With what?” I was thoroughly confused now. “It’s fine if you want to call this off. Bad timing, but I can just tell my parents it was a joke.” They would not get the joke, but if Danny wanted out, I’d do whatever it took to make her happy. I would do anything for this woman. That had always been true, and it would always be true.

“That’s not… I don’t…” She ripped her hand through her hair and yanked the clip out, making me wince. That looked painful, but she was going through something right now.

I stepped closer to her. “What’s wrong? You can tell me.”

Danny stared at my face with a pained look.

“I’m scared, H.”

The devastation in her voice hit me right in the center of my chest. What was going on?

“What are you scared of, babe?” I asked. The last word just slipped out of my mouth without me even thinking about it. How did that happen? I put my hand on her arm and begged her with my eyes to tell me what was going on so I could fix it for her.

Danny finally broke. “I’m scared of the way I feel about you.” Her voice was barely above a whisper.

“And how do you feel about me?” I asked slowly. She was going to have to spell it out.

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