Page 47 of Bound to the Mafia King

I thought this before, but now I was certain that I was in love with him. I was in love with Valerio Valdez. The Calloused King. The Prince of Darkness. I had given my heart to this man without even realizing it, and when I’d finally noticed how far I had fallen, it was too late. There was no safe landing for me. I had only hoped that he would be there at the bottom, waiting to catch me. But judging from the way things were going, I had little hope I would feel his arms around me. Instead, I would be met with cold, hard floor.

Tears pricked the back of my eyes.

It was a cruel and twisted joke that had been played on me.

I stared out into the water and breathed in the crisp air.

I could always think when I was close to the water. I closed my eyes and placed the back of my head against the trunk. The stinging behind my eyes increased, and when I closed them, I could feel the first tear roll down my cheeks.

I was overwhelmed. Everything just felt so heavy at the moment, and I didn’t have the energy to do anything. Valerio had abandoned me, and my brother had boxed me into a corner.

The tears flowed down my cheeks faster, wetting my skin.

I could feel my heart breaking. I didn’t know that was possible.

I felt a shadow loom over me, which caused me to peel my eyes open. I immediately connected with a pair of dark brown eyes that stared down at me.

“Do you mind if I join you?” Savina stood above me in her summer dress and a small little child in her arms. Her hair was down, and her face was void of any makeup.

I was so used to seeing her done up and polished that seeing her laid back and… normal, humanized her.

I cleared my throat and wiped away the stray tears that remained on my face. I blinked away the last moisture and then forced a smile onto my face. The wind blew through my hair gently, and the leaves whistled along with the air.

“Sure.”

The corner of Savina’s lips was titled upward in a small smile. “Can you hold her for me?”

Without hesitation, I opened my arms ready to receive the little one. Her mother gently placed her into my arms without stirring her awake.

“Oh, my goodness.” I stared at the little piece of heaven in my arms. Her cheeks were rosy, with a perfect little cupid bow. Her little chest rose and fell gently as she slept in my arms. “She’s gorgeous. You made a beautiful baby, Savina.”

She sat beside me with her legs crossed and looked down at her daughter. I could see the love radiating from her eyes. Her children were her heart and soul.

“Thank you. I didn’t know that evil like me could make such purity and innocence.” There was a distant tone in her voice. “Inever saw myself as a mother. I knew there was a certain part of me that always wanted children, but I didn’t know if I was capable of actually doing it. I was terrified when I found out I was pregnant. I was excited, but there was another part of me that didn’t want to fuck this up. I only knew of this world. That was what I had grown up in. I was calloused, cold, and deadly. It was what I needed to be to survive the world that I had been entrusted to lead. How could I, the Ice Queen, raise children with love and compassion?”

Savina brushed the back of her finger against her daughter’s cheek. Seeing them interact made my heart contract from the thoughts of the reality my life would have been if this world had been different.

I rarely saw her children, and within the weeks I had been here, I had only ever seen her son a few times and sweet Esmeralda twice. She was protective, which meant she jealously guarded them. She understood the world we lived in, and she wanted to protect them as any mother would.

“She softens you.” I moved my eyes from the sleeping baby to Savina. She stared right back at me with that same piercing gaze that Valerio had often given me. “Them, and Andres.”

“Love has a funny way of doing that.” Her words had a double meaning in them. There was more to what she was saying, and I was almost certain I understood it well. “Youmade him soft.”

I didn’t need to ask who she meant. The true question of what she was asking had been in her eyes for weeks. She had known of Valerio.

“He’s gone.”

She nods her head slowly in agreement. “Not to his own vocation, I would say. You do understand why the two of you can’t be together, yes?”

“I do. I’m not a child. Sergei is meant to help revive my family’s honor and all that we lost.” The words had been burnedinto my mind by my brother. I understood the role that I had to play. His life was on the line, and there was no other choice left for me. I needed to protect him just as he had done for me, for many years of my life.

“Women in our world are often used as the bargaining chip to elevate a man’s status and power level. We have no access or claim to that power. We are simply used as the key to turning the lock so they can walk through the doorway. They think that we are the ones who are useless, just toys to use, but they are wrong. I know you feel powerless. I felt the same when I was told that I would be forced to marry Andres. We were from opposing families; how could we ever make peace? But I knew that the duty was to my Family and the Organization. I had to be selfless. But within myself, I was selfish. I did everything on my terms, and I bowed to no one, including my fiancé. I was trained to be a weapon, but I saw that the most lethal attack against my husband was my women-ness. Men start wars for women. They have broken down entire Kingdoms for a pretty face. Men may hold the power, but we can command it whilst it is in their grasp.”

I never thought of it that way.

“You see, men use their violence and brutality. Women, we use our brains and beauty. We cannot be leveled down by sex or looks. We have control and restraint… so use yours. Wipe your tears. The life you will live is long and hard. You cannot allow him to see you weak. You already are the face that launched a thousand ships, Anastasia. You brought one of the most calloused and cruel underbosses in the country to his knees with one look.” Her words were strong and piercing. She wanted me to grasp that concept and make it mine. “For what it’s worth, I am sorry that you have to marry that man.”

I waited for a beat to allow her words to sink into my mind. I stared down at the little sleeping child in my arms. Shewas only but a baby, but from the moment she took her first breath, she inherited the enemies of her parents. Poor little thing didn’t know just how much power and violence covered her life already. And yet, her mother had managed to shield her and her older brother from the outside world. Savina had managed to create a haven where she could exist away from it all.

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