Page 83 of Fate and Fury

According to Andrei, the failure of the crops had not yet spread to Rivki. But surely it would, and then what? No one would be safe.

There was a knock on the door of the library, and Ana stepped through, her smile widening at the sight of Katerina. “I thought I’d find you here,” she said, taking the chair next to her fellow Dimi. “Look what I brought you.”

Bringing a hand out from behind her back, she presented Katerina with a perfect, beautiful roll, sprinkled with seeds. It was still warm, and Ana unfolded her hand to show Katerina the tiny flame burning beneath it.

“A gift,” Ana said.

Katerina’s eyes prickled with tears. “Surely you’re hungry, Ana. I can’t take this.”

“Nonsense.” Ana pressed the roll into her palm. “As hard as you’ve been working, you need to eat, Katerina. I…I wish I could help. Maybe I could look through these books with you, or…”

She cast a doubtful glance at the teetering stack of volumes, and despite herself, Katerina bit back a smile. Reading had always been the bane of Ana’s existence. For one thing, it required sitting still for way too long. And for another, she’d always complained that the letters danced, turning backward and upside down and blurring off the page. For her to make an offer like this meant a lot to Katerina…perhaps even more than the present in her hand.

Accepting the roll from Ana, Katerina tore it in two, then gave half back to her friend. “You’ve already helped,” she said. “You’re the only one who’s stuck by me. The only one who dares besmirch their reputation by being seen in my company. And now this.” She took a bite of the ambrosial roll, chewing as slowly as possible to savor it. “I’m more grateful than I can say.”

Ana pressed her lips together. “I’ve been thinking, Katerina. I know I told you that I would stay here to tend Niko’s grave. And…and I will. But what if Alexei and I rode to the Magiya? Not now, but maybe the night that the Kniaz arrives to Reap you. It’ll be chaos, I’m sure of it. Already there’s much talk in the villageof making preparations. He and I could leave then. We could ask the scholars if there’s a way to save Niko. To free his soul.” She gestured at the pile of books. “I know that’s what you’re doing. What you’re trying so desperately to find. But if there’s an answer here, you would have discovered it by now. And I just—I can’t stand to see you…”

Her voice trailed off, and Katerina patted her friend’s hand. “No,” she said around the lump in her throat. “I won’t risk you that way. Look what happened to Nadia and Oriel. I did this, Ana. Fixing it is my responsibility. Not yours.”

“You don’t have to do everything by yourself!” Ana said, wiping furiously at her eyes. “I know how prideful you are, Katerina. How stubborn. But just…just let me help you. Please.”

Numbly, Katerina shook her head. “I told you. You’ve already helped. I…I care for you like a sister, Ana. I can’t drag you down with me. And besides,” she said, managing a small smile, “Kalach needs all of its defenders. I can’t ask you and Alexei to abandon your duty now, with three Shadow-Dimi pairs away at Rivki and me about to leave, too. The village has already lost one alpha Shadow; it can’t lose another. Much as I appreciate your offer, I can’t be that selfish. I’ve already done enough.”

Ana heaved a sigh. “I thought you’d say that. At least let me help you put these books away. And then I’ll walk you home. Again.”

No doubt, her fellow Dimi was thinking of the mob that had attacked Katerina. Of the chant,Shadow-killer,the fusillade of stones. Katerina couldn’t ask Ana to put herself in the way of that, either.

“I’ll do it,” she said, managing a small smile. “There are some I still haven’t read all the way through, believe it or not. You go home. Rest. And thank you for the roll.”

She crammed the rest of it into her mouth and made exaggerated moans of delight, which elicited a reluctant gigglefrom Ana. “You’re welcome,” her best friend said. “Don’t stay here too late, Katerina. That fool who’s wandering about, Andrei…I don’t trust him.”

“Nor do I,” Katerina said softly, remembering how Andrei’s eyes had lingered on Elena. How he’d insinuated Katerina’s place was in Kniaz Sergey’s bed. “Nor do I.”

She watched as Ana walked from the library, closing the door behind her.

After she’d finishedevery delectable morsel of the roll, even dabbing the crumbs from the table with a moistened finger, and reshelved all of the books, Katerina sat alone in the library, head buried in her hands. She refused to believe her quest was at an end. There were four days left until the Reaping, and she needed to use every one of them to save her Shadow.

She wished she could talk with Sofi. Other than Ana—and Niko, of course—the other Dimi had been her closest friend. But Sofi had more reason to hate Katerina than almost anyone. Because of what she and Niko had done, Drezna had fallen. Sofi and her Shadow had lost friends, fellow warriors, parents, home. She probably detested Katerina now. Maybe Sofi, Trina Samarin, and Dimi Zakharova were sitting around a rowan-fire in Rivki at this very moment, listing all the ways that Katerina was a disgrace to the realm.

If so, then Katerina deserved every word. But was it uncharitable for her to think that, homeless or not, at least Sofi and Damien still had each other? What would she herself do, if faced with a choice between saving Niko or Kalach?

She hoped that, whatever befell her now, one would not preclude the other. That Baba had been wrong when she’d said,Katerina, you have doomed us all.

She wouldn’t give up. She couldn’t. There had to be a way.

I told you I would stay here to tend Niko’s grave,Ana had said. Well, Katerina hadn’t left yet. Maybe that was something she could do, while she tried desperately to free her Shadow’s soul.

She stood, drawing a deep breath, and slipped from the library, making her way through the darkened village. No one spoke to her as she crossed the square, where Maksim and his father were putting up the last of the tents for the celebration to welcome the Kniaz in the gathering dark. No one stopped her when she passed by the tavern where Andrei and his cronies sipped watered-down ale, served by a woman who had once asked Katerina if the Dimi would bless her first-born child. She wondered if she’d become invisible. Or if the villagers had come to hate her so much, they could no longer bear to acknowledge her existence. The few people who spared her a glance gazed at her with such disgust, she could hardly stand to meet their eyes.

In better times, having Kniaz Sergey visit Kalach would be a tremendous honor. But now, when the village had so few resources, putting together an event worthy of welcoming the nobleman was devastating. If they failed to supply the Kniaz with enough food and drink, he’d be insulted, and Saints knew what he would do to them. But if they offered him what little they had left, then the villagers would starve in earnest.

Once again, this had somehow become Katerina’s fault, even though she hadn’t asked for the Kniaz to come here. Even though the idea of becoming the man’s plaything, bonding to a stranger, and leaving Niko behind was the last thing she wanted.

An undeniable sense of relief washed over her as she stepped from the lights of the village onto the path that led to Niko’sgrave. Here, at least, there was no one to stare at her with accusing, hungry eyes. No one to judge or ignore her.

She knew she shouldn’t do this. That being alone out here, with the Darkness gnawing at the edges of Kalach, was dangerous. But who knew how many more chances she’d have to pay her respects to her Shadow? When she left for Rivki, she might never come home again. Any number of disasters might befall her between now and the rise of the false Bone Moon. If this was her last chance to sit by her Shadow’s grave, she would seize it, and damn the consequences.

She walked as silently as she could through the trees, along the path that led to Niko’s grave. She didn’t dare use her magic to light the way. With as out of control as it had been lately, she might well burn the woods down. So instead she carried a small lantern, and hoped its light wouldn’t summon anything untoward.

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