Page 115 of The Flame and the Forsaken

“If only either would proffer the peace that has eluded me for so long.” Rylahn sank deeper against his thighs. His head faced the ground. “But peace and I are unacquainted.” He abruptly sat tall. “I won’t hurt you, Mariel. My son loves you, and I love him too much to break his spirit when he’s only just discovered he has one. But as I’ve just given you my testament, I’m asking for yours in return. For your full honesty. Will you, for once, give me that?”

Mariel cautiously settled back down, crushed so far to her end of the bench, she was half climbing it. “Don’t ask me for names. Those I will never give.”

“Do you actually love my son, or is it just another one of your lies?”

“Aye, I do.” Mariel felt lighter suddenly, not in the confession but in answering the question from the one person whose belief in her was absent. “It would be far, far easier for me were it all a lie.”

“Then tell me how that is possible, after all your hatred for us? Afterten yearsof vengeance, whyhim, the son of the man you most hate? For if this is not retribution, it is one hell of a happenstance.”

Mariel already had her answer, for the many hours she’d spent contemplating it. She only had to decide how much was for others and how much was for herself. “I saw his heart, and I knew it was good. And when I gave him mine, he treated it with the utmost care. I knew he would never do to me what his father had.” He didn’t deserve the rest, the most vulnerable and raw parts that were hers alone, but she said it anyway. “He was the first safe place I’ve known since I lost my parents and sister. Angeriseasier. There were years it was all I could consume. Love, forgiveness... They take so much more from us. They give us everything to live for and everything to lose. Nothing about loving Erran has been easy, but that’s not his doing. My armor was so thick and calloused, I’ve forgotten how to remove it. Still is. Yet somehow, he’s discovered a way, and bit by bit, I’ve let him.”

Rylahn frowned, considering her words. He stood. “I’m going to ride through the lake district with Erran.”

“You have?” Mariel rose with him, stunned. Her pulse hastened again, as though the fragile trust they’d built was crumbling. “Why?”

“He asked me to.” Rylahn stretched a tentative hand toward her. It landed awkwardly on her shoulder with a quick squeeze. “You’ll obviously do as you please, but I hope you will leave speaking with Destin to me.”

Mariel nodded remotely. The late afternoon haze only added to the surrealness of a moment she still didn’t understand. “Why... Why did you tell me all of this?”

But Rylahn didn’t answer. He cast another squinting look toward the sky and limped back to the maze path.

Erran wanted Mariel there.It was her story to tell, and he had no right telling it for her. But his father would only go if they went alone.

On the ride to Mistgrave, he told him why.

About Mariel’s mother.

About Destin.

The aftermath of his fateful choice.

And then he stunned Erran again when he revealed he’d told all of it to Mariel first.

“The truth is I’ve been here plenty in recent years. I come alone.” Rylahn led them down an unfamiliar path, which took them deeper into the woods. “To a place Mariel might want to see. You could take her sometime.”

Erran was still fuddled by everything his father had said, and so casually. He didn’t care about some place in the woods; he had questions, too fucking many of them. But his father refused to answer any.

Rylahn pointed as they entered a small clearing. There wasn’t much beyond the brush and fallen leaves, but in the center was a cairn. Stones of similar size were piled and stacked. “I made this for Ofaelia.” He nodded sideways. “Eh, maybe for Astin too. And their young lass. Never learned her name.”

“Whoa. Whoa, whoa.” Erran shuffled in front of his father. “You cared enough to build a memorial but not tofixeverything you upended when your feelings were hurt? If you wanted to honor Mariel’s mother,that’show you do it. Oh, and her name was Angelika.”

Rylahn’s knuckles went bone white as he twisted his reins. “There are things I didn’t tell you about the auction. There’s a reason it was necessary.”

“What does the auction have to do withanythingI just said?”

“The contract I signed with the barons who took over the lake,” Rylahn said, “gave them fifteen years of prosperity. At the expiration, all authority was to revert to me, their services no longer required. The decrees they’d instituted and upheld would be undone, though they’d keep anything they’d earned in that time. But they wanted to renew the arrangement that made them very wealthy men. Why wouldn’t they? A taste wasn’t enough. It never is.”

The entire ride, memories from Erran’s childhood had become wisps of remembrances in his thoughts, only to be reframed with everything he’d learned about his father. Celebrations he’d held with other men had obviously been about the land confiscations. The barons who would approach Rylahn in the villages about his “beneficence,” sealing their proclamations with knowing looks, made far more sense. And, however illogical, Erran at last had an actual answer why carrots and cabbage had always been forbidden in their kitchens.

But it all added up to one thing: the man he’d known as Father was not the man others had called friend.

Still, he was there. Observing. Confessing.

“I should hope you wouldn’t want to renew such a foul arrangement,” Erran replied when it seemed his father was waiting for one.

“I never intended for it to exceed the fifteen years. That was more than enough time to make a point, and a year in, I already had deep regrets. I never foresaw how... bad it could get if I wasn’t there to oversee their choices. But if I reneged on a contract I signed as the steward of this land, then it would undermine all contracts, all laws. I cannot be above judgment. No man is.” Rylahn dismounted and crept toward the cairn. He crossed his arms as his shadow spread over the rocks. “The barons threatened a coup if I didn’t sign for another fifteen years.”

“And? Do not all the soldiers of our region answer to you alone?”

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