Page 158 of The Duke and the Disciple

Drazhan quietly left the room.

“And I will try to forgive you.” She stretched up for a kiss, soft and lingering. “In time.”

He gripped her face in his hands and kissed her harder. “I’m an imperfect man, and I will make more mistakes, but never one like this. Never again.”

She slowly lowered, frowning as she returned to her feet. “Why now, Rahn? Why not say these things before I left?”

He fought the urge to look away. “Years I’ve been holding onto something terrible... and itwasterrible. But in the years since, all I could remember was that the last time I’d loved to the ends of my own soul, all of it was taken from me.” A sad smile cracked the corner of his mouth. “So I lied to myself as well, because I’ve always loved you, and whether I lost you to my own stupidity or to Marek’s...” He cleared his throat. “In the end, we’re all lost to the inexorable call of time, but we don’t have to be dead before it happens, do we?”

Aesylt watched him closely. “You killed him. Marek.”

“About eight weeks too late.”

“I wouldn’t have predicted it.”

“Because there are parts of me, Aesylt, that I’ve not shown anyone.” He brushed the back of his hand along her forehead. “But I want to try. For you.”

She let the words wash over her in silence. It was another minute before she broke it. “Whatdidhappen to you out there?”

“This imbecile rode through an ice storm, broke his arm, sprained his ankle, and nearly lost half of his toes.” He chuckled without humor at his idiocy, which was so much clearer with the danger having passed. “Drazhan healed me, but I’ll need a few days of rest before I’m back to my usual self.”

“I’m surprised he didn’t leave you for dead.”

“I fear he only saved me because he was afraid to face you if he didn’t.”

Aesylt laughed softly. “Maybe you’ll survive another day. Or two.”

Rahn gathered her hands in his and lifted them, then pressed them to his chest. “It was never just research to me, Aesylt. I was in awe of your belief you could separate the emotion from the science, but I knew I never could. Every moment with you felt like an insidious betrayal of your trust because every moment with you was the best moment of my life.”

“I failed too, over and over and over.”

He smiled. “I know.”

“What you said in Wulfsgate... I’ll try to forget the words, but I don’t think it will be so easy to set aside something that caused me so much pain. You were so... so resolved, a different man than the one standing before me now, but I don’t understand how.”

“He was a man in denial of more than his own feelings. A man who could not address the past, because to do so would bring forward a brighter future, and he didn’t think he deserved one.” Rahn kissed her hands. “I’d like to tell you what happened to me the night my family died, if you’ll hear it. What I did. Not tonight, but... but soon.”

“I would like that.” Aesylt rolled her lips in, nodding. “And I... I’d like to tell you more about what happened the night of the Nok Mora. Not tonight, but soon.”

“It would be my honor, Aesylt.” He swayed, teetering and sinking onto a nearby chair. “I’m...”

“A mess,” she said. “You’ve had a taxing night. Why don’t we go to bed?” With a sigh and a soft smile, she said, “We can talk more in a few hours when we wake.”

“I’m sure my old room is still made up.”

“No, Rahn. Mine.”

“Go to bed together? Will I wake with a sword to my throat?”

“I always bolt my door, so if you wake with steel at your throat, it will be mine.”

“I don’t recallthatbeing on the curricula...”

“Whatever will we do now that we’re not bound by their restrictive rules anymore?” Aesylt’s eyes narrowed deviously. “You never gave me your answer.”

“About what?”

“Reenacting the Dyvareh, but without the restriction of rules.”

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