Page 10 of His Daggered Heart

“Well, what happened? He was crying, Alex.”

What is her fucking deal, and just when I was about to let her know that I was going to talk to him and try and make it work? Tsk tsk. “Well, Cora, it’s no longer my business. I saw him. He was drunk off his ass and I talked him down after he assaulted Levi.”

“Forget your precious Levi for one second and think about the man you fell in love with. I feel bad for him, Alex. He’s hurting.”

“I’m not having this conversation again.” Just as I’m about to hang up, she walks through the front door and I’m glad Levi went to the gym early.

“I knew you would hang up on me, that’s why I called on the way home.” I roll my eyes and start to walk upstairs. We had fallen asleep on the couch watching movies, hoping Cora would finally be home to talk. “I’m just concerned. He was good for you, Alex.”

“I’m not talking about this, Cora. Drop it.” I take two steps at a time to get away from her as quickly as possible.

She shouts up the stairs, “Of course, not, so run. Run away like you always do. You’ve moved on fast enough. I guess you’re good.”

The fucking nerve. I rush down the stairs, interrupting whatever words were about to leave her lips before she has the audacity to speak them. “I didn’t run this time, Cora,” my voice rises. “HE RAN!Hedid. You want to talk about who’s hurting? Me, but you wouldn’t know that because you’ve been running around having the time of your life with Edward. Want to know who was here helping me pick up the pieces? Levi. So yeah, I’ve moved on but not the way you think.”

Tears fall, even though I don’t want them to. I hate looking weak, but I’m so fucking angry and hurt that I have to cry or I might do or say something I will regret. I take a moment to internally pat myself on the back. Lee would be proud.

“Excuse me if that’s a little hard to believe since you’re partying, and have a new guy in your bed as if Kohen never existed. So what’s different? Tell me,” she shouts back, which is highly unlike her. I stare at her, eyes wide.

“What is your damn issue with this? It’s my life. Mine,” I say, wiping the tears angrily from my face.

“Because he loves you, Alex, and you love HIM. I know you do,” she says, sounding defeated.

I stare at her blankly before responding. “Then he wouldn’t have left.” I pause. “And for your information, I haven’t slept with Levi. Not in the way that you think I have. Not yet, anyway.”

I’m not sure if I want her to know we are just friends or if I want her to keep assuming we are dating, so I added that at the end. I tried when we first met and he stopped me. He kept me safe while I was drunk. Since then, I haven’t gotten drunk again. “I’m working on myself, and healing my broken heart. Kohen should do the same.”

With that, I run down the stairs and rush out the front door. I need air...and space... Every single time I’m reminded about him hurting, I weaken. I don’t want to be weak for him. But I do want him, I miss him. I want to make it work. At least I think I do, but in my time and my way. It’s nobody’s business but mine.

I know I broke him but he still holds all the pieces to my heart. He never fully put them back together and I think he holds them in his heart now, daggered with all the broken shards. No matter what lie I tell myself, I’m tied to him and he knows it. I am his.

I climb into my car and pull out my phone.

Me: Kohen, can we talk?

Handsome: …

Chapter 11

Kohen

Gettingthattextmessagefrom Alex lights a fire under my ass. The anger fueling my body dissipates, and the beast inside me is resting. Whatever hangover I had is now gone. I shower so fucking quick. I just need to get to her, to see her. I know I made a fucking ass of myself last night but here she is, wanting to talk.

I’m speeding down the highway to get to her, my girl. This is the chance I need to tell her how I feel, why I left, and how I’ll never do it again. Thank fuck training ended early or I would have missed the opportunity.

When I got the text, I looked over at her cowboy. I wonder if he knows we are meeting. I think about rubbing it in but I don’t. She belongs to me, was created just for me, and no matter how hard she tries to fit him in the space that’s meant for me, he won’t. I belong there, only me.

I pull into the parking lot in front of the dance building and see her car parked in its usual spot under the big Texas mountain laurel. She loves that damn tree. I pull up next to her and I look into her window smiling, but when she looks at me I break. Her eyes are rimmed with redness and her nose is pink from sniffling. I rush to unbuckle my seatbelt and get out of the truck.

I hear the click from the doors being unlocked and I open it and climb in. I face her, reaching over the center console to hold her beautiful face in my hands.

“Angel, what’s wrong?” I stare into her chocolate eyes. They look so dark in the shade of the tree, no golden flecks, no warmth.

Using her sleeve to wipe her face, she begins to respond, “I’m so fucking broken, Kohen. I’m hurting inside and all of you keep treating me like I’m the bad person here but you left. I’m tired of talking about it, about how you left.” More tears fall. “And I’m so fucking tired of crying. You promised me. You made me trust you and I did. I did. I know I’m hard to handle, to love, to be friends with, but you told me I wasn’t and then you walked.”

“Baby, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, please-”

“No, you don’t get to be sorry,” she interrupts. “I have walked around this campus with a scarlet A on my chest, bearing the sin of being the girl who broke you, and I’m done. In the words of Meredith Grey, I make no apologies for how I choose to repair what you broke. You fixed me, you made me feel whole again, and then you pulled the rug right from under me and made me feel the lowest I have ever felt. Like I’m not even worthy of a fucking conversation. You had another girl answer your phone when I was at my lowest, drunk and high, and feeling like I didn’t even want to take another breath without you.”