Page 46 of Chasing Sunsets

Tamara glared up to the sky, then faced Ruben.

“I’m only going to aim for spring training next fall. If nothing happens, I’ll stop. I’ll stop, go to school, and get a full-time job without ever mentioning the NFL again. Except for watching games, you like those as much as I do.” Ruben took steps toward his wife with every word he spoke. “You’ve been exceedingly patient. Give me one more year. I can’t do it without you. I need you with me.”

“One, you promise?”

Ruben made an x over his heart. “Promise.”

Tamara closed the distance between them, and he engulfed her.

“You called Dre?” Sadie whispered to Zack.

He nodded. “He set it all up. A wise woman once told me, ‘Help where you can. It’s what we’re on earth to do.’ That same woman has helped her roommate and is setting up a barbershop amidst thisChasing Sunsetsadventure.”

A lump clogged Sadie’s throat. She’d said that a long time ago. Of course, talking to Kelly and calling her cousin had been simple things, and she realized how much she’d missed doing for others the last months.

~

Dr. Blankenship endedup being older than Kelly expected. He wore red-rim glasses and his hair was a mix of black and gray. He put her at ease from the first words he spoke. “I first want to say how hard it is to be in your position. Vaginismus is a frustrating diagnosis. It’s different for each woman and must be treated individually.”

“Thank you.” She meant it.

“I’d like to speak to Brett privately first, then you, Kelly.”

An hour later, Kelly hung up with Dr. Blankenship. Needing to collect herself, she paced back and forth in front of the door leading to the suite living area where Brett waited. Her stomach growled. She’d barely eaten anything at brunch.

The doctor suggested she try to live in the moment.

Had she ever done that?

No. She was a planner, a worrier. It was time to try something different though.

She wanted to have dinner with Brett tonight. Where would they eat? Would Brett want to go to dinner with another couple or spend time alone with her?

Damn.She wasn’t doing well living in the moment.

She brushed her teeth, gathered her courage, and stepped into the other room. She spotted Brett sitting on the balcony. A blast of heat met her as she opened the sliding door. She went to the railing and used a hand to shield her eyes from the afternoon sun as she peered down at the Riverwalk. People crowded the walkways. “How did your visit with the doctor go?”

“He asked what I wanted out of our marriage,” Brett answered.

“What did you say?”

“You. I want you.”

Her first instinct told her he was trying to spare her feelings because of her sexual issues. Except, the doctor insisted she needed to listen to Brett instead of projecting her fears into their discussions. She turned toward him and leaned against the black iron railing. “I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t want me after the way I’ve acted.”

He scowled.

“Dr. Blankenship asked me my biggest fear. I told him I knew how much you wanted kids, and I feared I would never be able to give them to you. He replied with, ‘Is that all?’”

Brett simply looked at her.

“After thinking about it, I explained I’m afraid I’ll never be able to satisfy you.”

He opened his mouth.

She held up her hand. “Then the doctor said you shared with him how we pleasure each other and what we do is enough for you. I know you’ve said the same to me, but I didn’t believe you. My inadequacies made me completely insecure and deaf to your words.”

The dam she’d erected for her tears threatened to break. “I didn’t think we’d enjoy a normal marriage without having traditional sex. The doctor said I shouldn’t gauge our marriage by some standard or preconceived notion. In love, in life, there are no comparisons. No ledger of right and wrong. And I need to trust you’re being honest with me.”

---