Page 42 of Jagged Edges

“No, Bello.”

“Then tell me why Brisk? Tell me why I’m alone right now because I’m not feeling that shit, baby.”

“Because, I felt we both needed the space, Bello.”

“You needed the space. I don’t need shit… but you. So, tell me where you are.”

“I can’t do that Bello. And, you’re right. I needed the space to clear my head and figure out how to go about this Melonie situation the right way.” I stared at my toes as they dangled from the camper.

“There’s only one way and that’s to just tell her.”

“It’s not that simple!” I found myself doing something I rarely did. I yelled.

Bello was stunned into silence, forcing me to continue the conversation on my own.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized, “I just feel incredibly stressed, Bello. Until I make this right with Melonie, I won’t be able to lay in your bed as if I don’t have a care in the world because I do. Her name is Melonie and she doesn’t deserve what I’m doing to her.”

“But I do?” Bello posed.

“No, no you don’t. That’s what makes this so complicated.”

I wasn’t only letting Melonie down, but I was letting Bello down, too. I understood that, which only piled onto my stress. He was ready to introduce me to his family as his girlfriend, yet I was still trying to process how much differently I’d be seen after the cat was out of the bag.

“Come here, baby,” he pleaded.

“I can’t Bello. Just give me the night, okay?”

Hesitantly, he sucked the skin of his teeth before replying, “First thing in the morning, Brisk. Be here. One night!”

“One night,” I reiterated.

Nineteen

One nightquickly turned into two… and then three. That’s how long it took me to build the courage to break the news to Melonie. Aside from a few missed calls from Bello, there wasn’t too much effort on his end to contact me and I appreciated that.

So beautiful.

The stars twinkled in the sky, strategically highlighting particular spots in the sea of endlessness. After being away for some time I’d missed these moments. The hills had been home for so long, I didn’t realize how much I’d grown to love them. The peace and tranquility they offered were priceless and something that I valued more than I knew.Until this moment.

The little time I’d spent away from Bello was daunting. To be quite frank, I’d even call it horrifying, emotionally. However,it was just what I needed to get my thoughts aligned with the actions I’d been making so that I didn’t feel like crap when I thought about it all. The truth was, I wanted Bello in every way possible. Not in secrecy, but openly and honestly. He deserved that and Melonie deserved the truth.

Just send it,I rallied. I’d been typing and deleting the same message for the last thirty minutes. Before I could change my mind again, I tapped the blue arrow.

I love you and I miss you. We have so much to talk about.

I waited a mere minute before the gray bubble started bouncing. It wasn’t until her message appeared that I realized I was holding my breath.

Melonie: Yes. We sure as hell do. Are you already in bed? Can you come over, now? Please. I have so much to tell you. Everything is a mess, B. I went to the clinic two days ago because I’ve been burning every time I pee. I got my test results back today and I just need you… tonight!She shared with me.

I’m on my way.

I responded as soon as I finished reading her message. It was clear that she needed me. Just as she was always there when I needed her, I desperately wanted to be here for her. In under three minutes, my camper was packed and everything that had the potential to fall in motion, I secured.

I slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine. It lit up without hesitation. Since being serviced it hadn’t stalled once and the ride was much smoother than before. I wanted to thank Bello every time I got it going but I hadn’t been able to bring myself to do it for the last few days knowing that I’d lied to him and stayed away much longer than I’d promised.

The twenty-five-minute drive to the Frank’s residence was a breeze, literally. My hand hung out of the window as I caughtthe night air in my palm. The city’s lights danced on my skin as I appeared and disappeared from beneath them. The late September air was dreamy and very indecisive. Fall had come, but Summer wasn’t quite ready to leave us. So, we were faced with a slight chill at night, nippy mornings, and heatwaves from midday to the evening. The weather was just as confused as I was.

I crept down the street, noticing Melonie in the driveway fully invested in a conversation on her cell. Just before pulling into the spiraled driveway, she spotted my van. Hadn’t it been serviced, she would’ve heard it at least a mile before she gained a visual. It was pretty loud.

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