Page 38 of Broken Bonds

I sniffle, my lips trembling.

“I know! I’m eating, I swear. I just can’t keep it down most days. And sleep comes when I’ve cried myself to exhaustion. If I haven’t cried, then I’m up for hours on end. This depression has its claws so deep in me and I don’t know how to get myself free.”

She sighs and kneels in front of me, cupping my cheek in her palm. Her soulful brown eyes stare deep into mine and it feels like she sees me. She can see every jagged, busted piece of me that’s been ripped apart at the seams despite how hard I’ve tried to push it all back together.

“You gotta talk to someone, baby. Gotta get everything off your chest that’s weighing you down and the thoughts in your head out,” she tells me gently.

“I don’t want to see a shrink, Ma.”

“So don’t. First, talk to your doctor. Then, maybe talk to Jilly. Vent to her.”

I sigh and grab her hand in mine, holding it in my lap. “I don’t want to put all of that on her when she’s grieving, too. I’ll find someone else to talk to. And I will bring up the way I’m feeling to my doctor at my appointment today as well.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Good. Come on, I’ll walk you back out.”

She stands and holds her hand out to me. I place mine in hers and let her help me up out of the chair. I’m nearly nineteen weeks now, and today is supposed to be the day I find out the genders of the babies.

I’ve decided not to.

Just doesn’t feel right without my alphas here. As badly as I’ve been dying to know this whole pregnancy, without them here, it doesn’t really seem to matter.

I know I’ll love them no matter who or what they are, anyway.

Maribel and I head out of the office and out to the bar area. I can feel Forde’s eyes on me the minute I’m back in open view, the hairs on the back of my neck standing in awareness. The urge to turn and look back at him is there, but I ignore it, keeping my eyes straight ahead.

“Don’t burn the place down while I walk Ramsey back out to her car, you two,” Ma calls out to the alphas behind the bar.

“Hey! I think I’ve more than proven that I won’t go burning shit down around here. Forde, maybe. Can’t say for sure about the big lutz sometimes, but me? I’m good, Miss Maribel,” Rion calls back, pulling my eyes to him.

He wears a toothy grin and his eyes twinkle as he eggs Maribel on while he cleans the glass in his hand. There’s a toothpick sticking out of the side of his mouth, clenched tight between his pearly whites, and his hair is tied in a knot at the base of his skull. His beard is trimmed neatly and matches the color of his hair, and I just know that copper streaks gleam beautifully in the sunlight.

“Hush, you. Don’t go acting up with the boss lady here or she might give you the boot,” Maribel snickers, nudging me with her elbow and making a tiny smile appear on my lips.

“Aw, well, I wouldn’t want that. My apologies, Omega Daniels,” Rion says, flicking his gaze towards me and looking at me softly as he dips his head.

I can feel my cheeks heat with his eyes on me and an odd warmth spreads across my chest, which makes me uncomfortable. I clear my throat awkwardly and give him a tight smile.

“I’ll let you off with a warning this time, Alpha,” I tell him softly. “If you’ll excuse me. It was nice seeing you both again.”

I quickly turn and stride towards the doors with Maribel right on my heels.

“And what have I told you about that ‘Miss’ crap? Cut that shit out before I shove my size five foot up your ass,” I hear Maribel gripe as I walk out making me shake my head.

I don’t hear what’s said after that, but Ma chuckles when she meets me outside. I huff as I lead the way to my car and throw myself into the seat once the door is open, looking up at the older beta as she leans in.

“You okay with them working here? You say the word and I kick ‘em right on out,” she says, showing me her booted foot.

I shake my head. “No, it’s fine. Honestly. You say they’re good workers, and I trust you. You love this place as much as Van and Lake did. I’m just grateful you agreed to keep running her,” I whisper, looking back atJinxwith a fond smile.

“Got that right. Go on and get out of here. Check on those babies and have that talk with your doctor, hmm?”

She shoots me a stern look with her eyebrows raised before slamming the door of my car, patting the roof once and then retreating into the bar. I pull out once she’s back inside, heading straight to my appointment with a stone sinking in my gut.

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