Page 2 of The Lies We Believe

Pain seared my lungs as I inhaled. Gritting my teeth, I climbed onto the toilet and carefully stripped off my stained clothes. I couldn’t just leave them in a soggy heap on the floor—I’d have to wash them in the shower with me and hope they’d dry in time for when I needed them.

Time passed in a blur once the icy drops had numbed my skin and eased the ever-present pounding in my head. By the time I blinked back to the world, I was curled up on the old mattress I shared with Dale, teeth chattering a mile a minute. The rough fibers of the threadbare blanket covering me did little to retain heat.

“It’s okay, Riv. I’ve got you.” Dale slid his arm around me and pulled me into his body. His larger frame wrapped around myback, the heat from his skin slowly seeping into mine. “You can sleep now.”

My body took him at his word, and everything went dark as unconsciousness claimed me.

“Do you want a hit?You’re gonna need it to get through tonight.”

I glanced up at Gabe through my lashes as he poured the baggie of coke onto the cleared surface of the one dresser we had in our shared room. There were six of us in here, with three queen-sized mattresses between us. It was squalor at its finest.

We didn’t get nice clothes unless they were required for an appointment. We didn’t get to leave the room either, but as disgusting as these walls were, at least we were safe in here.

“He’s not wrong, you know,” Dale added, taking the straw from Max, who’d just taken a hit.

I knew that, but I hated drugs and the feeling of losing control of my body. It scared me that a john could do anything to me and it wouldn’t register. In a life where I had no control over the autonomy of my body, I clung to the tiny scraps I had.

“Come on, Riv.” Gabe held out his hand, hauled me up, and put the straw in my hand. “Let it take the edge off. I’ll give you another bump before we get there.” Dahlia had built tonight up to be something incredible for her business, which meant we needed to take whatever was forced upon us without question or there’d be serious repercussions. It was the fear her words invoked in me that made me accept Gabe’s hand.

My shaky fingers wrapped around the straw as I held it over the innocent-looking white powder and inhaled. It burned, probably due to being cut with shit that would kill us—if a john didn’t first—but I welcomed it. It let me know I was alive for a moment. A minute. A second.

The next thing I knew, we were being let in the back entrance of a swanky hotel. The sounds of a busy kitchen echoed down the corridor as they herded us like sheep into a service elevator. Black Dahlia had sent me, Dale, Gabe, and Max, with her compliments for the night.

Our handler, Sean, leered over his phone at me before going back to his Candy Crush game. The ride was smooth, but it did nothing to eradicate the dread sinking into my bones. Something was off, and it wasn’t just from the coke flooding through my veins. It was in the air, making the tiny hairs on my body stand on end, alerting me of danger. I couldn’t grasp on to it long enough before a wave of euphoria washed it away.

The elevator walls rippled around us like we were in a scene fromThe Matrix.Maybe it was the drugs, after all. I blinked, and pristine white walls replaced the steel ones, so bright and clean they made my eyes burn. Sean knocked on the door in front of us. The penthouse, according to the brass plaque.

It opened, revealing a man in a white shirt and black tie. He looked like a waiter. He ushered us inside and whispered into Sean’s ear. The oaf nodded and shut the door behind him. It was almost like he was never with us to begin with.

“Follow me,” Black Tie Guy said and led us into a laundry room. Turning, he looked down his nose at us. “Strip and put your clothes here.” He pointed to the empty counter. We followed his orders without question, the urge to fight long beaten out of us.

Shame regarding nakedness didn’t exist. Whether it was one-on-one, or in a room full of people, it didn’t matter. I didn’t care.I’d never had the chance to be a prude growing up the way I did. It just was what it was.

“Tonight is gonna be a shitshow,” Dale breathed, leaning over me to put his clothes next to mine in a neatly folded pile.

“Once you’re done, line up here,” Black Tie barked and pointed to the area by a stainless-steel sink. One by one, we stepped up, and the asshole snapped on a pair of latex gloves.

He shoved Max into the counter and pushed against his shoulder blades until his chest pinned against the cool granite. “You’re not allowed entry until I’ve searched you.”

It didn’t register what he meant at first, and my mind struggled to hold on to his words long enough to make them make sense. But I would never forget the sight of him ramming his hand up Max’s ass to do a full cavity search.

“Oh shit!” Gabe gagged.

“Silence!” Black Tie’s words were whip sharp.

I flinched, hunched my shoulders, and wrapped my arms around my chest.Retreat.Years of abusive words went off in my head like fireworks. The once visceral blows to my flesh echoed across my broken soul.

“Someone is on a power trip.” Dale pulled my hand from my face. “It’s going to be okay, Riv.” He squeezed my shoulder and took Max’s place.

Gabe took advantage of my distraction and shoved a pill down my throat, mouthing “swallow” before slipping around me to go next.

Once Black Tie searched all of us, he ushered us through the solid oak door into the penthouse. The lights were a low, deep red that colored the walls, making it seem like we’d just stepped into the second circle of hell. A low beat pulsed through the air, already saturated with the heady scent of sex and drugs.

Whatever Gabe had given me was taking effect, and a mellow buzz drowned out the rising hysteria clawing at my insides. A tallguy, face covered by a black mask, grabbed my arm and dragged me behind him to a table fitted with straps and surrounded by seven others.

“Heads or tails?” The man who’d dragged me over asked, laughing at his own joke. I tried to focus on their voices, but they were fading, just like the room around me.

My back landed on something hard and unforgiving as they pulled my arms and legs in opposite directions away from my body. I was slipping, and the world flickered and faded into blackness.

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