Page 156 of Forgiving Fate

My head snaps to Landon, and he shrugs. “I had no idea.”

“No one did. Wesley explained that he heard someone was investigating the person who was looking into Allie. Once he found out who I was, he moved mountains to get me stable and on the way here. Wes tried to call everyone and see where y’all were when we were told by a girl at the tattoo parlor that you were all at the bar. And here we are.”

Holy shit.

Everything hits me in waves, and I can feel panic rising in my chest. Suddenly Landon stands and holds his hand out to me and I take it.

He tells everyone we will be right back and leads me outside, the cool air hitting me and calming me.

Landon pulls me to his chest and we stand in silence as my mind tries to process everything.

Part of me is happy that my mom is here and alive, but the other part feels like I am losing my dad all over again. Add in the fact that I have no idea if my long-lost sister is still alive.

My chest aches with every emotion and I try to focus on Landon’s hands running up and down my back.

I can do this. I am strong.

Overleve.

I repeat the words that have gotten me so far in my head a few times before looking up at Landon.

A smile spreads across his face as he places a gentle kiss on my forehead.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Knowing exactly what I needed, even when I didn’t.”

“Always.”

Resting my head back on his chest, I look out to the deep forest and say, “What are we going to do? What can we do?”

Landon hugs me closer, placing another kiss atop my head. “I don’t know. All we can do is take it day by day and wave by wave. We can’t stop life from taking turns, but something that will never change is that we are in this together. Forever. And nothing will drag us under because we will be there to bring each other back to the surface.”

He’s right.

Day by day. Wave by wave. We will survive this thing we call life together.

Chapter Fifty-Seven

Landon

Allie looks out atthe waves crashing on the sand. The clouds overhead are raging and threatening to spill at any moment, but she doesn’t notice.

She is staring out at the vast ocean like it holds the answers she is desperate to find.

I could sense she was having an off day and honestly, so am I. Stella was finally able to get in touch with Sutton’s parents and they are very open to bridging the gap between all of them, but Sutton is not in the right place for it at the moment. Allie understands it more than anyone, but I know she is feeling guilty and afraid of the unknown.

My guilt and feelings of failure have been rearing their ugly faces at the knowledge that Sutton was on Reslience’s radar for so long and we couldn’t find her. Factor in that we didn’t see the signs that Harrison was a snake in the grass. I’m really trying hard to not let the waves of guilt pull me under.

Allie has been meeting with Dr. Kim daily to help her through everything. I think being around her mom, Logan, and myself is what is helping her the most, because she knows she isn’t aloneand will get through this. I know this is bringing up feelings she worked very hard to get a handle on, but this is just a setback. We have all reassured her that it is okay to have setbacks, especially when it comes to the betrayal she experienced. So all we can do right now is show her we love her and that she has plenty of people to lean on.

Recovery doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t just happen with the snap of a finger. It is an everyday battle between your mind, body, and the thing standing there waiting for you to take one step forward so it can swallow you whole.

Today is one of those days where I want to run to the closest store and buy any form of alcohol I can get my hands on.

The guilt comes rushing in and desperately tries to pull me under.

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