Page 58 of Forgiving Fate

The final minute ticks by and as the soon as it runs out, I already have my key in the door ready to unlock it.

As I open the door, my body is on alert, but I keep my eyes down just in case she is in the living room sleeping. The last thing I want is for her to feel exposed.

“Allie,” I call out.

When she doesn’t answer, I slowly lift my eyes to scan the living room. It’s quiet, and the TV is playing some Christmas movie quietly.

Maybe she is sleeping upstairs, but then my eyes see the mess in the kitchen.

Steam is billowing from the stove, and I run over and turn it off. Luckily, it looks like it was only water and nothing that could have turned into a fire.

I turn around to face the sink and freeze.

Blood.

Blood covers the inside of the sink and I try to stop myself from panicking, but I feel it rising in my chest.

“Allie!” I yell and wait again, but hear no response.

I take a step back and feel something hit my foot. I look down to see a butcher knife covered in blood on the floor.

No. No. Please no.

I frantically start searching every room downstairs and as I start up the stairs, I hear a low cry.

Skipping two stairs at a time, I hit the loft bedroom and see the bathroom light on and run straight to it.

When I get into the doorway of the bathroom, I see her.

Part of me is happy that no one is here with her and I didn’t just walk in to her being murdered. But the way she looks right now tells me this is almost just as bad.

She is sitting in the bathtub holding her wrist. The shower is running, and she is sitting fully clothed, staring at her still bleeding wrist.

Slowly I walk into the bathroom, making my steps loud so my presence doesn’t shock her. “Allie,” I say quietly.

Her light blue eyes slowly rise to look at me, but as soon as she sees me, she immediately looks back down at her wrist.

When I reach her, I put my hand up to the water and feel it is seconds from becoming freezing and turn it off.

I quickly grab a towel and drape it over her shoulders.

Now that I’m close enough, I can see how much blood is in the bathtub and how pale she is.

Crouching down to kneel in front of the tub, I say, “Allie. You need help.”

I watch as tears stream down her face, and she shakes her head no.

I take a deep breath and try to calm myself before continuing. Fuck. This isn’t my norm. This is what Grayson does. This is why we send him in after the victims. He has this ability to make everyone feel safe. And I just get him where he needs to be to do it.

But there’s not a chance in hell she would let him around her. So she is stuck with me. Pressure rises in my chest and I will it to go away.

I cannot have my own demons trying to take me down while someone else desperately needs me.

“Allie. Please.”

She shakes her head no again.

“Okay. Can you show me the cut?” I say, barely above a whisper.

---