Page 21 of Forgiving Fate

She shakes her head no when a gust of wind hits us, her hair flying in her face and goosebumps break out on the little skin she has exposed around the collar of her shirt.

Allie gathers her hair in one hand, nods to me, then looks back out at the lake.

I drape the shirt across her back, pulling it slightly forward so it covers her arms.

I stand back to my full height and stare out at the lake. Silence blankets us and I know I need to go back to the beach to give her space, but something about this place is so peaceful and I want to stay in this state as long as I can.

“You can stay. I know that this place is addicting.”

She’s not wrong. I know it’s selfish, but I step up to where she is and sit down, giving her enough space between us. Resting my arms on my bent knees, I run a finger along the tattoo on my wrist.

Overleve.

My eyes close as I trace the reminder tattooed amongst the mosaic of broken art, cracked lines, and stories no one else knows but me.

The lake air fills my lungs as I repeat the word over and over in my head. And when I feel my mind settle, I open my eyes and stare out at the water below us.

The sun reflects off the water and each tiny wave that breaks from the jet skis further away casts tiny little rainbows in the wake.

We both sit lost in our thoughts and in a rare instance, my mind isn’t racing and my skin isn’t on fire. It’s usually the moments of quiet and peacefulness when they shine the brightest.

All the voices are gone and what remains in their place is an odd sense of comfort and peace fighting against the noises waiting to scream in my head.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Allie shift, and I turn my head to look at her. Her eyes are fixed on the water.

“When I was little, my parents used to bring me here.”

Her voice is quiet, but I can hear the slight edge of happiness as she watches as a kid jumps off the floating dock on the other side of the lake. Not wanting to interrupt her or stop her, I return my gaze to the lake and wait for her to continue.

“I was always confused why we never went to the other side. It was nicer and the kids in school spent summers there. I begged them to let us go over there, but they were set in their ways of sticking to this side,” she starts.

“I didn’t care as much when I was younger, because what kid would complain about going to a lake and jumping off the dock with their parents? We would stay until sunset and Mom would break out a giant picnic basket with enough food to feed a village, but we didn’t care. We would all sit here and watch the sun fall behind the trees and share our favorite parts of the day. Dad would say something like watching Mom belly flop. And Mom would say something sappy about watching her favorite people enjoy the sunshine.

“And when it came to me, I would always say something about being in the water all day. But as I got older, kids commented on the fact that we would go to the crappy beach. And as time went on, I started saying I wished we could go to the other beach, but they never budged.

“I never understood it until I was about fourteen or fifteen. Mom and I were on the swings while Dad was on the dock reading. I finally asked her and she–”

Allie pauses, slips her arms into my shirt and folds her arms on her knees. A tear slips down her cheek and she looks up at two bluebirds dancing in the sky. She watches as they make circles in the air above us, then fly off towards the shore. Her gaze returns to the water and she wipes a tear away with her sleeve covered hand.

I’m about to look away when I see a small smile spread across her face. It’s tiny and probably one of the few that she has worn in months, but it’s there.

Continuing, “She said something I will never forget until my last breath. This place may not be the most glamorous. It may not be beautiful according to the standards that society sets, but beauty isn’t just what is outwardly shown. It’s what lies beneath the surface under all the cracks and bumps. And when you actually take a chance to see what lies underneath, suddenly that thing that is flawed to the outside world is the most breathtaking view you have ever seen.”

My chest constricts for some odd reason as the words of Allie’s mom hit me hard.

She wipes another tear as the bluebirds soar by again.

A smile spreads across her face, and she clears her throat. “And from that moment on, this place had a new look. Everything was brighter. The swings didn’t squeak, the dock didn’t creak, and the other place faded into the distance, leaving me and my two favorite people in the most magical place in the world.”

Tears fall down her face, but her smile doesn’t falter. I should look away, but I sit in this moment a few seconds longer.

I return my gaze out at the lake, turn my hat around backwards so I can feel the sun against my face and soak in the moment. And then, somehow, the sun shines brighter, and this place radiates something that can only be described as magical.

And I know in this moment that this unexpected road trip was worth it.

Together, two strangers sit in complete silence. Fighting two completely different invisible wars that are unknown to each other. But in this moment, even through the pain and heartache, we are experiencing the same sense of peace.

Chapter Ten

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