Page 64 of Survival

“Andwedeserve a mother who doesn’t abandon us when we need her most,” Annie tossed back. “Let her go stay withyoubecause we’re not ready to get her back.”

“This is herhome, Annie, but I will be staying here in the guest room for a couple of weeks to make sure everything’s okay.” He sighed. “I know you’re mad, andhurt, but what about your brother? Doesn’t he deserve to have his mom back?”

Annie swallowed, fury still pulsing through her glare, but she held her stance. “Don’t do this,” she pleaded. “I’m not ready.We’renot ready.” She reached out for my hand, and the second she grasped it, it was like someone had taken a chisel to a block of ice, breaking me free from my frozen prison. I sucked in a gasp of air, everything hitting me like a brick. I wasn’t ready. I was so far from ready.

I yanked my hand from Annie’s, taking a step back, my heart pounding. I couldn’t hear. There was a pulsing in my head like water was rushing through my ears. The pressure too much. Their faces shifted into concern, alarm touching their eyes as I took another step back. And another.

“I have to go.”

I turned and bolted, flinging open the front door to race to our truck. It took three turns before the ignition kicked in and the engine roared to life, the seat vibrating beneath me. I threw it into reverse and hit the gas, Annie’s alarmed expression watching me from the porch as I pulled away.

I couldn’t handle it. I couldn’t think. I needed some way to process, and right now I could only think of one place where I could do that. I called Leo when I reached a light, wishing Tucker wasn’t at work so I could have called him first.

“I’m heading to the studio now. Meet me?” I said, desperation thick in my voice when he answered.

“What’s wrong?”

I shook my head, silently cursing. I didn’t need him asking questions. “Just meet me. Please.”

He was silent for a beat, but then I heard, “Okay.”

Relief washed through me as I tossed my phone back into my purse. I needed to escape. To process. I wasn’t ready to face my consequences from that night. All I wanted to do was shove it back because Mom never would have had that accident if I hadn’t taken off. If I hadn’t lost control.

Like I’m doing now…My stomach sickened, and I forced myself to take a breath and pull into a gas station for a minute to gather myself. The last thing I needed was another accident. My phone rang, and I knew it was Annie without even looking. Just like I knew the one a few minutes later was from Tucker, that Annie had let him know I needed him. But I wasn’t ready to talk. I needed to dance, and Leo would be waiting, ready to work on our partner piece we still hadn’t mastered.

I glanced down at the dash before pulling back out and scoffed, annoyed. Apparently, I was close to repeating part of that night, anyway. Backing up, I pulled up beside one of the pumps and got out to fill the tank. I leaned back against my truck, everything in me drained. There just wasn’t much left to give. My emotional tank was on empty just like the tank in my truck.

My phone started ringing on the seat again, and I knew I was going to have to answer soon. I couldn’t ignore them forever. It wasn’t fair, and with the way I’d taken off, I was sure Annie was worried.

God, I was a shitty sister.

Forcing myself to take in several long, deep breaths, I closed my eyes and was finally starting to calm when someone said, “Looks like it’s my lucky day.”

Everything in me tensed at that familiar dark voice, and my head whipped to the side to see Zane standing right by my gas tank. His car was at the pump behind mine, the gas ignored. He’d zeroed straight in on me.

I wanted to cry. Zane was the last thing I wanted to deal with right now.

“Please, don’t. Not today.” My voice sounded weak, and he frowned, shifting so his arm leaned against my truck.

“Something happened. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Zane. It’s just a really bad day.”

“How can I help?” He stepped closer.

“You can’t,” I snapped, my eyes flashing, frustrated that he once again refused to get the message.

“I can if you’d let me. Is it Tucker? I’ve heard the rumors, and I’ve heard about your mom being gone. I’m sure that must be rough. Why don’t we go somewhere? Talk?” He took another step closer, his body now leaning over mine as he reached for my hand, and I flinched back against the side of my truck as my thoughts spiraled. Because he would. Hewouldbring her up.

My throat clenched as tears threatened to spill, and I desperately blinked them away. He was too close. Too many memories threatened to surface as my body remembered the consequences of having him near, my breathing becoming panicked and harsh as my PTSD tried to kick in. I shoved against his chest. “I said you can’t help, Zane, so stop! You’re just making it worse! You always make it worse.”

“Hey! She’s telling you to stop, so back the fuck off!” Someone appeared, forcing Zane back, and my eyes almost bugged out of my head when I realized it was Micah in a standoff with my ex.

“Like you’re any better than I am. I remember what you and your brother did. This is none of your damn business.” Zane glared, his fists clenching at his sides, but Micah just crossed his arms over his chest, his large frame hiding me, giving me the chance to escape into the cab of my truck. I scrambled inside, watching them from the side mirror.

“She. Said. Stop. Now, leave her alone, or I’ll be removing you myself.”

They stared each other down, but when Zane saw that I’d ducked into my truck, he backed away, glaring at Micah until he was in his car and driving off.

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