Page 1 of In the Line of Ire

Chapter One

"Checkus out," said Lily, placing her left hand over mine so that wecould view our engagement and wedding rings side-by-side. Lily hadbeen wearing hers for a while now but my wedding ring was less thana month old. My left hand still felt the extra weight from thenewness of the band. "We're all grown up."

"I neverthought we would live long enough to say those words," Iadmitted.

"Therewere some crazy moments," agreed Lily. "Now zip me into thiscocktail glass."

"Breathein and suck hard!" I demanded.

Lilysucked in a deep breath and I yanked the zipper of the neoprenecostume upwards. She turned around, hopping slightly, thanks to thenarrow stem glass that formed the leg compartment. "How do I look?"she asked, her face peeking out of the constricted headhole.

"On ascale of one to crazy?"

Lilynodded.

"Twelve," I decided. "Are you sure this will drum up morebusiness for the bar?" We both turned to look at the long mirrorLily had recently installed in the employee bathroom. Lily'scostume was shaped like a martini glass, complete with a stemmedcherry that was perched on top. I really “lucked out” with myoutfit. I was a pint of beer. Amber-colored satin, topped with arim of white, frothy foam that was made out of some kind of fluffy,synthetic fabric and couldn't be allowed within a mile of a nakedflame. Emerging from the middle of each of the costumes were ourfaces. Surprisingly, we weren't even blushing but I figured thatwould change just as soon as we waddled outside with the stacks offlyers that Lily printed up to promote happy hour at the bar sheowned and ran.

"I thinkwe look awesome," said Lily. "I knew I should have gotten the wineglass suit for Ruby. I wish I’d covered all the bases: beer, wine,and cocktails."

"Rookieerror," I lamented as I shook my head, adding a dab of lip glossuntil I realized it didn't do anything to improve my look. Nothingcould have.

"Let'sgo outside and hand these flyers out to the passersby." Lilyattempted to hook her arm through mine as we headed for therestroom door. We both gave up when we got stuck in the gap.Eventually, Lily gave me a shove and the beer suit squeezed beforethe sides collapsed and I was thrust out first. I reached behind meand tugged Lily through, turning just in time to see her cherrystem hitting the top of the door frame and waggling back andforth.

"Howfortuitous it is that you just got back from your honeymoon anddon't have any cases lined up," remarked Lily as we wobbledforwards.

"Sofortuitous," I sighed. When I departed for my honeymoon, I was LexiGraves, Private Investigator; when I returned, I was Lexi Graves,flammable beer glass. It wasn't the career turn I chose orexpected, but I did promise to help Lily out, especially since, asshe pointed out, I didn't have anything better to do atpresent.

Wewaddled through the quiet bar and stepped onto the sidewalk,blinking at the bright sunlight.

"Happyhour at Lily's Bar!" Lily announced loudly, shoving flyers into thehands of the two young men who were walking past. They took onecursory look and stuffed the flyers into their jeans pockets."They're a sure thing," said Lily with absoluteconviction.

I handeda flyer to a mom with twins strapped in a stroller.

"Overindulgence in alcohol is how I got these two," shewhined, pointing to her toddlers before she handed the flyer backwhile shaking her head.

"Drinkmore responsibly," called Lily, waving as the mom pushed her twinsaway.

"Bitlate for that," I added but Lily had already jumped into the pathof a group of neatly suited women. She was reeling off the cocktaillist and trying to convince them to come to happy hour postwork.

I turnedaway, pushing a flyer into the hands of the next oncoming man."Happy hour at Lily's Bar. Bring your friends!"

"Lexi?"said my colleague, Tony Delgado. His mouth twitched like he didn'tknow whether to laugh or ask the obvious. "Is that reallyyou?"

Isighed. Of course, I had to bump into someone I knew.

"GoodLord, it is you!" squeaked my sister, Serena, who was married toDelgado. She gave me a head-to-toe scan before pulling a disgusted,but impeccably made up face at me. In her smart pantsuit andblouse, she appeared the exact opposite of me. Outshining me wasone of Serena's primary reasons for living so she took anyopportunity very seriously. Yanking the flyer from Delgado, sheraised her eyebrows. "Did Solomon already fire you?" sheasked.

"No!"

"You'veonly been married a month!"

"He didnot fire me!"

"Why are you doing this?" Serena persisted. "What is wrongwith you? What if someone sees you? What if someoneI knowseesyou?"

"Hi,Serena! Hi, Tony!" Lily waved cheerfully.

"This isso embarrassing," muttered Serena. "Do not tell anyone you know me,let alone, that we're related," she added as she pushed past ushastily.

---